Advice- divorce

All three are not possible practically now.
Reasoning;
1. The house that belonged to him he has right to gift / sell it which he already did in absence of any claim by child via guardian (you). The security of house is all now blown off.
2. MCD can take place while living under same roof. Only thing barred is sharing bed with him during the cooling period.
3. Discovering now of his old affair is now too late to ask him to mend his ways hence if he is reasonable enough in keeping agreed terms of MCD as per your mention in your brief then get over with MCD and restart fresh life with your child instead of spending years in Court.
4. Also note visitation / custody orders are never permanent and so do mentioned maintenance order under MCD and under change of circumstances they all can be modified in future.

dear TAJOBS sir,

i know you dont like people jumping in threads but wanted to say thanks for comming back with a bang as we all were missing one of the biggest backbones of lci

secondly you have a great fan following more than a superstar so please dont leave the forum as lot of people like us need expert advices on going the proceedings.....

                                                                                            thank-you............!!!!!!! 

Thanks Sir,

What about secutiry of house, i have no house to stay.

secondly, i have all proofs of his picture, confession about his affair with his gf. his thretening recording and emails to me. 

Will this stop my divorce .

i want to stop my marriage and have shelter for me and my daughter.

please advice

@ Lady,

Based on emerging facts;

1. Appoint via reference sympathetic advocate and direct him to file bigamy case against husband and his g/f along with her brother (common intention). The case is powerful to bring him to his knees and then settlement for security of a house may cometh.

2. Like I advised before (previous I said all three not possible) now I amend and say proposed two (security and saving marriage) also not possible for continuing reason the marriage is beyond repairs. reason being 13 years of marriage out of which 8 years he had an affair and your brief says you just came to know which to me may be fact without much questioning but if he spent 3/4 of his married life in affairs then what good he can become now ! Ask this question twice to yourself. As far as minor child future is concerned if he already assuring 35 k maintenance then via bigamy case once you get basic shelter over head as part of compromise (quash / settlement of bigamy case) the same could be increased or better lump sum amount could be put in a F/D U/G of you for child better welfare.

3. As far as present MCD motion is concerned you may choose your foot down not to join proceeding instead adopt stick (bigamy case against him as in above para suggested) and carrot (can later be opted into MCD / as part of whole scenario settlement deal) policy for the time being. If he can sell property and offer 35 K maintenance then in my opinion he can jolly well afford a 1 BHK as shelter and tweak the 35 k and turn it into some F/D too which all are some number re-assesment he has to devise his future into.

It is now all doable except saving marriage as today if he comes back he will come back with no warrantee that he will not be having rowing eyes. I will not suggest DV or IPC sections as for a fact you have some collection of proofs for 8 years of his roving eyes which to me is not done thing in healthy matrimony, either people kick other partner out then and there or use such collection for benefits which is what I have opined as quick way OUT.

Think about whole mess calmly and believe us 'divorce' is no more a dirty word in society provided shelter and F/D is cometh as you say you have some proofs of his bigamous character. Be advised further that the photos should be having negatives if they were clicked via older generation cameras and if they are printouts then photo printers shop valid bills should be preserved for evidence stage (also for admission / denial) etc. etc.

BTW if it is not out of place here then do introspect that a spouse collects such narrated proofs only for some motives (be it good here figure of speech) and not for continuation of relationship otherwise we term it as Stockholm Syndrome. 

@The senior,

CC-@Querist,

1.Bigamy and adultery charges cannot be brought in view of the given facts. The definition precludes this situation to become an offence under those sections of IPC.

2.Such adultery by the husband with a divorced lady prepares a ground for divorce. It's also a kind of cruelty.Therefore,Certain IPC section can be set in motion.

The above two paragraphs is only to bring the facts of the circumstances to your knowledge and I request you to not to take it otherwise.

Note-This reply should be taken as per the declaration given in my profile page.

Thanks,

Regards,

Mr. Sumitra Kumar,

Yes you are more or less right too in your advice, appreciate your free and fair second view on this query.  

There are things called abilities of a person against known disabilities. Here is a case of a young working lady where the said lady had love marriage of more than a decade old and out of it a teenage daughter they have and discovered in quick succession almost good quality proofs of husbands long time cheating character r/w may be some money trail of sale of his property going to brother of his ladylove and like she briefs us here she has some confession statements too which if litmus tested in Court instant results comes in her favour as she has a feeling that divorce is immanent yet her immediate requirements are for shelter and some financial comforts for her teen daughter which she will be left with in her socio-legal facts.

My advise here are based on conducting THAT litmus test which this lady claims she discovered wherein if same put to test a overconfident husband will collapse the moment a showcause Notice of a criminal court is issued to summon him / his g/f and brother of his g/f to the Criminal Court against earlier sweet Civil pep talks he roped in this lady into proposing just 30 K as some maintenance forgetting he cheated her for almost 3/4^th. time in their marriage.

I agree she has case for proving ‘cruelty’ but given to understand her disabilities like she is a working lady r/w a teen minor to look after and young age divorce looming on horizon, it would be too much to take in to see Court corridors for years proving THAT “cruelty” leaving aside immediate carrot he pledged if she opts for MCD keeping everything under the carpet as his freedom.

Well when I replied second time I felt it was not fair justice at the end to her, hence I suggested giving him a glimpse of bigamy laws with proofs she claims she have and then bargaining her comfortable exit route which I feel he may be able to see through as it looks he is in deep terms / deep relationships with this divorced lady and is also influenced by her side of relations too otherwise no straight married man blows away his property sale money to brother of his mistress in normal social context. That influence bonding needs to be shaken and unless heavy monetary compensation awarded there is no other quick way to keep all parties to the lis satisfied that justice being done as per facts which is filing a case of bigamy where quick and better results comes and it was not an un-ethical advice when divorce is inevitable between parties.

Hello Sir,

Proofs- Couple pictures emailed from my husband email account to my email account.

Chats- blackberry chat emailed from husband email account to my email account- mentioning they love eachother and are engaged.

Threatening email- husband email to my email (where he confessed of killing someone during college days and the same way he will kill me)

Recording- Killing me, my daughter if i dont divorce (Kill with a wepon (Hundting Khife) which he recently shop. (I have the knife and the receipt of the knife)

Recording- He confessed about his relationship with his girlfriend. Recording where he insulted me, threatened me and used all abbusive language and insulted my parents.

Last nite he tried to throw me out of house infront of my daughter and torchered me by insulting me infront of my daughter. (i did not utter a word as my daughters exams going on)

Kindly advice.

nisha.

@ Nisha 

you cannot clap with one hand it requires both hands and so is marriage and as the saying goes you can take a horse to the water but you cant make it drink  . As you are well aware that he is in a relationship with a Divorcee who i assume is after his money from the facts and circumstances which you have described and they are using him as a bait  . As long as the flow of money is there she will tango with him as and when it stops she would just disappear like thin smoke  and than seek for the next Bakra :-) which is my feeling  . 

Opt for MCD and settle the issue . Getting into litigations is just a waste of of your time and money spending time in the court premises and leaving your daughter while attending these court cases and leaving her with some one else would only lead to additional problems for your self . You would have to adjust to work as well as your daily chores which would be a hectic schedule and as he has proposed 30 K for your child take it and start your life afresh with your child . As you are a working women you wont get maintanence . i presume you can very well take a loan and go in for a place of your own .

Hello Sir,

My name is in Cibil where i wont be getting any loan in future. As during the initial period of my carrier, i had credit cards and auto loan by my name. He promised to help me to repay the EMI but failed to pay, also he used my credit card for his personal expense. That was the initial stage of my marriage and had never thought i would come to this stage today.

i recently approached a bank for home loan, but they rejected my home loan application due to my cibil record. In such condition how will I buy a property for myself. Also the maintainance he mentioned in MD is 30K for child till she get married.

Due to love marriage,i did not study further, (Am a graduate) and have no stable job, since am working in small firm. I had many gaps in my carrier due to personal problems that he created at home.

Secondly, while he is well qualified and used my money for further studies. Today he stands on a high position of being a VP of big company.

Advice.

nisha.

Read details of proof / his standing in society which are matter of interpretation in a court of law;

1. Interesting to note revelations placed here in installments and still same question being asked which is obvious. 
2. For a moment ignore all that is discussed earlier and if you want to save your marriage and want security of shelter then only one is possible out of the two remains as my stand i.e. security for a shelter / maint. for child and I still say the marriage cannot be saved.
3. These revealed proofs / his social standing also points to usage of two types of complaint case; DV and/or S. 498a. Both are time consuming and if used then prepare to juggle career r/w minor welfare over their long term outcome which is pointing to divorce.
3.1 In DV complaint case you may get rent for residence (till divorce), one time compensation, medical, restraining order not to remove you from present residence (till divorce) / contact, child custody and some maintenance for child as you are working etc. and court cannot give you that sold flat back nor court can tell him to purchase new flat for you.
3.2. In S. 498a complaints case the alleged proofs come under various interpretation scanners and may result into his conviction that also after years of proving a case.
4. The moment you deviate from present MCD and use DV / S. 498a the 30 K that he pledged is off and plain divorce / MCD filed by either (more likely pressed this time by you) / jointly sooner than later is inevitable which is all experiment is my stand.

Sum total the marriage is thus not saved yet left with glooming divorce r/w some maintenance for child over present offered 30 k r/w rent for residence and finally some conviction of his that also after few dozen years spent in Courts during evidence stages by you and initial money drain by you towards advocate fees carrying frustration of justice delivery system that our judiciary is getting famous for.

Against previous discussed and now said if you pull out from present filed MCD and use simply bigamy complaint case by finding local advocate and meeting part fees he / his associates who are declared proposed accused in the complaint case and the moment they all are summoned after placing these fresh revealed proofs and made accused persons I still take same stand that he / his associates will shake up and offer better monetary compensation by way of plea bargaining converting complaint case into compromise (MCD route later) which may cover both decent maintenance for child as well as better security for shelter yet the marriage is not saved.

Your brief says that you have come to a stage where you have to choose which bridge to burn and which bridge to cross. Thus make informed decision accordingly.

Re-read all that has been discussed here in your thread and use appropriate Law as in Chamber discussion now I have nothing more to add to your brief.  

Originally posted by : Tajobsindia
	Read details of proof / his standing in society which are matter of interpretation in a court of law; Against previous discussed and now said if you pull out from present filed MCD and use simply bigamy complaint case by finding local advocate and meeting part fees he / his associates who are declared proposed accused in the complaint case and the moment they all are summoned after placing these fresh revealed proofs and made accused persons I still take same stand that he / his associates will shake up and offer better monetary compensation by way of plea bargaining converting complaint case into compromise (MCD route later) which may cover both decent maintenance for child as well as better security for shelter yet the marriage is not saved. Your brief says that you have come to a stage where you have to choose which bridge to burn and which bridge to cross. Thus make informed decision accordingly. Re-read all that has been discussed here in your thread and use appropriate Law as in Chamber discussion now I have nothing more to add to your brief.

I agree to all of Tajobs points 

Highligted in red with no offence to anybody and read in good faith of any defamation cases, please note i wont be able to even offer  a  char Anna coin :-) . And this is a free Forum and i have my right for freedom of expression !! since nowdays i have been seeing threats among some Amicus curaie about summoining each other  here and there and there are open challenges being given by opp members okay i am practsing here and here, go on summon me and i too will summon you without even realising that a case even cannot be established for what they want to summon each other :-) :-) 

Now coming back to the point to the highlighted portion i wish to convey to the author of this post it may work out the other way round his counsel may buy out your counsel due to his standing in society and with his capability of throwing away money  and as a matter of fact the counsel's would benefit from this under the table deal  and you would be left to square one and standing  to get what was opted for in the MCD.

Now  the choice is yours as to how to handle the situtation !! 

Its difficult to get everything on a platter and all that glitters is not gold !!

It would be advisable not to give away your name as cibil in a public forum as chances are that your hubby too might be there on this forum :-)

Hello Sir,

Thanks for advice. After going through the response, it concludes i cannot save my marriage and have to let him go.

- Shelter and Maintainance is what i will fight for and accordingly ask him if he is ready to agree mutually.

- If mutually he denys to give me long term shelter and maintainance for myself and daughter , will take further steps and fight prolong years.

Thanks,

Nisha.

@The senior,

CC-@Querist,

Bigamay and adultery charges cannot be filed due to technicality in the difinition of Bigamay and Adultery.

 Bigamy is a gender neutral law.Therefore,It can be filed either against husband or against the wife.But Bigamy charges cannot be set in motion because here the husband hasn't married the widowed woman bust just live-in relationship at farthest.Also,It's difficult to prove so.

Adultery requires an outsider to intrude into the marriage institution and does not include strictly the husband and/or the wife.Adultery is gender specific law.This outsider must be a man and not a woman strictly to speak.

Though,I am not in disagreement with your advice, she can set either the criminal law or the civil law or both in motion. There is no prohibition to go for both the remedy at the same time. But that would be an extreme step.So It all depends on the querist how she wants to proceed.

Note-This reply should be taken as per the declaration given in my profile page.

Thanks,

Regards,