Dear Experts,
I and my wife were not in terms for more than 3 years. We have a 10 year old kid. I had asked her many times to go for a family counselling, but she never cooperated. Most of the days she stayed in her parents house for no reason. Two years back, she even asked for divorce. i took it lightly, But she again after two days.. Again, after 3 days, she sent an SMS asking about the divorce and left got her parents houses.. I did not react.. The next day, one of our neighbours came and told me that my wife had met her and informed her that I and my wife were parting ways. I was shocked to hear that, however, i sensed that she had some other motive. After 2 days, my wife returned and again asked for divorce. That time I told her that it should be on mutual consent divorce and asked her a copy of her identity proof to initiate the divorce procedure. I insisted that she wrote on the photocopy that -- "I agree to produce this copy of my identity proof for the purpose of filing mutual consent divorce" -- along with her signature. She didn't say anything and did not give me any documents. After 2 days, again I reminded her. . Again she left for her parents house. The next day, she sent an SMS stating that she had asked divorce by mistake. i replied that i had lost faith in her after all such happenings and therefore, want to with the divorce procedure. After few hours, she replied pleading that whatever she had done was wrong and she would not do that in future. Even for that message, I said the same thing that i would not retract from my decision as she had forced me to take that decision and I had lost trust on her.
From the above incident , I understood that she wanted divorce, but want to portray to her relatives and friends that it was me who wanted divorce and therefore I had initiated the divorce. She wanted to show that she was innocent.
After that incident, my mother and my close relatives advised to continue for the sake of our kid but with a caution.. Since then we never communicated with each other though living under one roof, except that she will ask me one thing "I need money for expenses".
Now, since the start of pandemic situation, she has been staying in her parents house the whole last year. She came for one month in this year and again left just before the lockdown despite advising her that it was not good to travel. All these two years, her behaviour did not change and I felt that it is waste of time to lead such a meaningless life.
Now, I have decided to apply for divorce as this kind of life is creating too much of stress personally and socially. (Hope experts would understand what kind feelings i would be going through!.)
Based on the above incident, my query is:
1) Will it be appropriate to send a legal notice to her for "Judicial Separation" instead of 'Divorce"? Because I wanted to be legally separated from her in any form.
2) In case, she has any revenge motive and tries harasses me in any form, can I file for 'divorce' in the court even though i had sent notice only for 'judicial separation'?
3) Will the above incident and the SMS sent by her help me in my divorce case?
4) From the earlier incident, I know she won't give divorce but will try to loot my properties through court. How to safeguard it? I am ready to provide her alimony with my monthly salary but not with my hard earned properties.
Thank you!
Sekar
