How to get rid of my mother?

Your question looks inhuman as you are a retired man, your mother must be much older, yet I understand your problem.I want to know what ld members advise in such critical situation.

how you got the house? is it purchased by you or an ancestral property?

The land is purchased by me and also the house was built by me by my own money, when I was working, around 15 years ago for my father and mother.

Now, I am paying the price for it.

@ Author

1. Is anyone from your wife's side alive who are able bodied?

why? yes, most of them are. why are you asking this?

Mr Chauhan

I can totally understand what you must be going through

I really appreciate your concern for your wife, may GOD bless every woman with such a husband.

However you should also try to understand your mother. I understand that your mother must be really very old may be in her 80's and in this age people become kids again. You should completely ignore what ever she is saying and just remember that she gave you birth and she is the one you raised you with all the love and care, hwen you were a kid  you may have hurt her her a lot but as a mother she nevertook even a notice of it as you meant everything to her. Now just think her of as a kid who does not even understand the meaning of what she is saying. Make you your wife also understand that. Tell her" ki unki baaton ko dil se mat lo". Your mother cannot harm you physically she can only speak..... and you completely ignore whatever she is saying, and fulfil your duties of a son. She may be very bad to you at present....but remember you exist becuase of her...remember you childhood....

With your sister you can talk to her straight away explain things and if that does not work tell her to keep away from your family matters.

(All mothers hold grudges against their daughters in law in the Indian family csenario: As Women never get love and respect from their family members , only thing they have is to hold on to their children especially sons as they know that daughters will leave after marriage. So all their life is spent doting on their son. After marraige the sons drift apart and the daughters in law are blamed for it. If the sons know how to keep a balance between mother and wife he can help develop better relationship between them)

Consult a phychatrist and take his advise for your problem, it may be that medical help will help you and your mother. often such problems comes in old age.

you don't know my mother. she once tried to poison my wife and my baby son. I regret my decision to not handing over her to police at that time.

mr chauhan

i can understand ur prblm.i think ur wife is ill because of ur mother.may be in the past u never tried to listen to her prblms which she was having b'coz of ur mother & sister.she never got the care & attention which she expected frm u.As a result she lost her self-esteem &faith.but anywaz now u know evrything.frm now onwards give as much love& care to ur wife which she always deserved.regardig ur mom ...as she is in her 80s she cannot harm u or ur wife physically.try to ignore her but  give full attention to ur wife.This will b a defeat to ur mom & sister.everything will b fine:)

i fail to understand how an 80+ lady is affecting ur life..

not just ur wife,ur mum also needs psychiatric help.at this age,they too long for peace and simple food.i think that somewhere down th line,u have not learnt to handle ur mum.so she has become overbearing.take her to a psychiatrist.if he diagnoses her to be having some illness,get her treated for it...

besides my above advice,i wonder why u dont live separately from ur mum if she is so bothersome?

even if this is ur self owned house,u let her live alone here,without naming this property in her name.so no one will snatch ur house even if u live separately.

if this is also not possible,construct a dividing wall so that she cannot access ur area.now please dont say that an 80+lady is so powerful,that she will break the dividing wall also to intrude into ur ife..

all said and dun,i feel u shd not abandon her completely.after all she gave u birth..she got u married.because of her upbringing only,u were able to work...if she had not brot u up well,u wud not had any confidence to work also.

u give her some money monthly for her sustenance,even though u may boycott her.

even if u take recourse to law,people there will wonder why u dint take any action against her,wen she had tried killing ur family....they may think u r cooking up stories about an elderly person to harass her...law may/may not book her as she is too old....

please think with a cool mind and solve ur problems urself.how will u feel if ur son and his wife treat ur psy. wife in the same manner in her old age,if by chance u die before her?will ur soul not cry seeing all this ill-treatment?

see,our problems which seem like a mountains have simple solutions which we never try to seek,because we are always charged wid emotions.

so act wisely and coolly,else u may have to repent later on if u do anything illegal,and all ur retired life will become more torturous than now...

good luck!

by any means,send your mother for few days to your sister's home. within a week she will understand the nature of her daughter. MOST happly married daughters treat their own parents badly.