Mediation process

Mediation is a process wherein a mutual settlement is sought to be arrived at. All this happens in the presence of a mediator.

Keep the company of a good mediator with you and do not give in to the demands of your wife....

Regards

Chetan(dot)7679(at)gmail(dot)com

Originally posted by : Suresh AAA
	Hi Sir/Madam, Thanks all for the support you people provide on this forum. Really Appreciated.. My query is about Mediation process. My marriage did not last for more than 6months. False 498A was filed against me and my family, along with CrPc 125. For 498A  we have got a later date. CrPc 125 still going on and nothing is finalised yet.  I have filed for a divorce on the basis of cruetly. After 4 dates, she appeared before the court and finally judge reffered for mediation. I would like to know, what exactly happens during the mediation process? Anything important I should keep in mind. Thanks in Advance.

The first step towards divorce:  Mediation

There will be a queue of people waiting for their turn, as you saw in the family court, your number [ not much difference will be left by the end of it, your name would have taken the form of a number] will  be called out.

Now both of you go in.

Usually it will be a bench of 3 lawyers who act as mediators, at least 2 female lawyers will be there and 1 male lawyer.

They will ask you whats your story?

You tell yours, that youve been humiliated to such an extent that you do not wish to continue with her under any given circumstance and that accepting back is ruled out.

If she says she does not want to live with you etc, good for you.  The mediators will write down both sides of the story and will ask you to sign, which of course wont have any value, but of evidence that mediation happened and that the process failed or passed.

The mediators will talk as if they are your well wishers [to be precise as if they are your parents].

Dont ever lose cool during mediation, tell each and everything is a  polite manner even if the same question is asked a 100 times.

I came to know that mediators may mention something more rather than "MEDIATION FAILED DESPITE OF BEST EFFORTS"

In other words, can they mention some kind of blame upon the boy if he refuses to take back the wife & refuses to pay XX amount? Is there any set law that they CAN NOT MENTION REASONS OF FAILURE IN THEIR REPORT?

Originally posted by : rajiv_lodha
	I came to know that mediators may mention something more rather than "MEDIATION FAILED DESPITE OF BEST EFFORTS" In other words, can they mention some kind of blame upon the boy if he refuses to take back the wife & refuses to pay XX amount? Is there any set law that they CAN NOT MENTION REASONS OF FAILURE IN THEIR REPORT?

They will surely mention their findings as failed and give one explanation as to why it failed, take in writing what you said etc what she said etc, get you to sign it etc

What there to blame? nothing, two people dont want to live together what will mediator do?

Will they write and give boy adamant girl adamant?  Let them write whatever they want, what will happen?

Nothing, mediation has failed the judge will write down in his diary and the case papers, thats all.

Now I dont know why you are scared of such a thing,

Chill man.

Want wife, take her back.

Dont want wife, tell them that you dont want her back into your life.

Nobody will hang you for not taking your wife back ! No court on earth could punish you for not taking your wife back.

only output of mediation :

report stating - Mediation Succussful / Failed.

nothing else appears on Record.

mediation can be helpful IF both the parties want to resolve the dispute amicably through WISE discussion.

otherwise its nothing more than a Fiasco.

if u r a husband - 

just assume that u are in a platoon headed by a rude Lady commander - she abuses u in all the ways - degrades u for nothing - does not listen to u at all - assumes that whatever wife tells is True & whatever husband tells is False.

my observation :

Mediation is a Time Killing process.

Sorry to read that above 2 posts reveal contradictory stand:

If blame is mentioned that boy is adament....It creates a lot of damage in the courts which have biased judges, they are just finding some excuse to damage boy's side. Many of judges sit on the seat with PREDETERMINED MINDSET. So in my view, things do matter if BLAME IS MENTIONED IN FAILURE REPORT. Experts/members who have been through the process may please tell:

1) Whether documents are generated (who told what) at mediation cell? Are these taken on record? Are these day nots sent back to main court at the end?

2) In summary report/final report, whether cause of failure is mentioned? To what extent mediator can write down damaging remarks?

things do matter if BLAME IS MENTIONED IN FAILURE REPORT.

nothing is mentioned in the report except success / failure -

NO REASONS R RECORCED AT ALL.

1) Whether documents are generated (who told what) at mediation cell? Are these taken on record? Are these day nots sent back to main court at the end?

NO - NOT AT ALL.

2) In summary report/final report, whether cause of failure is mentioned? To what extent mediator can write down damaging remarks?

nothing - at all.

Is this universal or varies from place to place?

Is there any legal binding upon mediators too, how to write FINAL REPORT, are they legally also bound not to write blame?

Is this universal or varies from place to place?

same for entire India

Is there any legal binding upon mediators too, how to write FINAL REPORT,

YES

are they legally also bound not to write blame?

YES - they can not blame any of the parties, if mediation fails.

mediation is a voluntary process, meant to settle the dispute amicably. One can also refuse to go for mediation, if he/she wishes - nothing can force a party to go for mediation.

Hey All,

Thanks a lot for your valubale inputs. Mediation process happened and as expected she and her family demanded  for 10LAKHS to take back all the cases filed on me and my family.

From then I am in a confused state of mind. Requesting few suggestions or inputs which will help me come out of this mess.. Just an FYI.. I am NOT in a position to give away 10lakhs..

Thanks in advnace.. 

Then bargain with her, o'wise let mediation fail.

Case wil be decided on merits

hi all,

tomorrow I am going for mediation. Hope my lovely wife turns up. 

This particular thread has given me some insights into the mediation process. Will handle accordingly. But i am not going to be diplomatic as anyway this mediation is not going to affect any case later. Let me directly say that I want to divorce and see the reactions of my wife.

will post the outcome. meanwhile any suggestions from you are welcome.

@suresh AAA,

bargain, try to bring it to down. I wish my wife makes a demand to settle down the matter amicably. 

Mediation with reference to query is all about introspection in today’s world of female specific laws vs. your age / monetary capacity r/w lady luck to your side and a damn good seasoned advocate backing your fights;

i.e. if you are young and really believe in family life and think you need to give one chance to yourself then agree to all her / her side’s say before mediators and come back to home hand in hand with her. All cases withdrawn and both live happy ever after.

i.e. if you are entered midlife and still believe in family life and think she needs to be given one chance then walk halfway before mediators and come back to home hand in hand with her. All cases withdrawn and both live happy ever after.

i.e. if you have crossed your youthful years and have experienced mid-life years too yet have just entered your sunset years and thus now realized that your matrimonial life was all facade all these golden years and wants to now save whatever is so called left of your old age and cool your heels afresh with probable a live-in partner then concede to all her / her side’s say before mediators and come back to home with just empty pockets minus un-disclosed savings warning smile and then live happy ever after with lost/found live –in partner.

So far as what mediators have to mention in file goes with reference to query there are two judicial bottom line versions if above workup by you cherry picking the one which best suits your age / monetary capacity r/w lady luck to your side and a damn good seasoned advocate backing your fights was digestive enough and it really goes only like these;

One – Parties agreed to close their differences based on such and such terms and file sent to Court for decree accordingly. Parties informed of next date of hearing.

Two – Parties failed to reconcile inspite of our best efforts and parties have been informed of their next date of hearing in Court and file sent to concerned Court with our annexed report for further proceedings as per Law.     

Point to remember here is that party’s respective advocate(s) have equally greater role to play to draw a closure of client(s) issues than mere mediator’s best efforts who are trained professionals from legal / social law backgrounds. Now if 1 mediator or 3 mediators sits for mediation is all dependent as per allocation as per District Courts / HC’s mediation Cell’s roaster and may differ from place to place.

ahaaa !

here Tajobs returns !!