Santa's interpretation

• शास्त्रों में लिखा है कि पति-पत्नी एक ही गाड़ी के दो पहिये है! अगर दोनों में से एक भी ख़राब हो जाये तो गाड़ी नहीं चल सकती!
  तो इससे हमे यह शिक्षा मिलती है कि स्टेपनी हमेशा साथ रखो!

   

• संता और बंता जंगल में घूम रहे थे! सामने से शेर आ गया!
  बंता ने शेर की आखों में मिटटी फैंकी, और दौड़ने लगा और संता को भी दौड़ने को कहा!
  संता: मैं क्यों दौडू, मिटटी तो तुमने फैंकी है!

   

• संता : बंता भाजी आप जुआ मत खेला करो ! जुये में अगर आदमी एक दिन जीतता है तो दुसरे दिन हारता भी है !
  बंता : ठीक है संता भाजी!
  आज से मैं एक दिन छोड़के जुआ खेला करूँगा !

   

• संता और बंता रेल में सफ़र कर रहे थे ! गाड़ी बहुत तेज चल रही थी !
  बंता : अगर गाड़ी उल्ट गई तो ?
  संता : तो हम टिकट दिखाने से बच जायेंगे !

   

Dear Doctor,

Today morning I read all ur jokes, Thnks.

oye sachin sab,

ye aapka santa tripathi ji ne pakard liya.

complaint to admin u/s-363,366against tripathi sir............

hahahahahahahahahahaha...............

two haha for every joke.............

Once Santa & Banta were travelling along with their friends Monty & Jaggi. On a road surrounded by forests on both sides, their car was attacked by robbers. Santa & his friends were pulled out of the car. The robbers blasted the car and took Santa, Banta and their friends in the middle of the forest where their boss was residing.

Now, this boss was fond of jokes. So, he put the condition that whoever tells a joke that makes every single person laugh should be left unharmed and alive, but if one single person doesn't laugh then the joke-teller would be shot to death.

Banta started telling the funniest joke he had ever heard, "One day........." and when he was finished, everybody were falling with laughter except Santa. So according to the vow, the boss shot poor Banta.

Now, it was the turn of Monty. He also told the best joke he had ever heard. Again everybody laughed including the boss & his robbers, but still Santa was quite as a statue. So the boss shot him.

Then came Jaggi. As he opened his mouth to tell the joke, Santa suddenly burst into laughter. Everyone was puzzled. Santa was laughing madly.

The boss asked him, "Why the hell are you laughing without hearing the joke?"

Santa said laughing and giggling, "Oh! How funny Banta's joke was!"

i bhai santa is santa.

A man hasn't been feeling well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete check-up. Afterward, the doctor comes out with the results. "I'm afraid I have some very bad news," the doctor says. "You're dying, and you don't have much time left." "Oh, that's terrible!" says the man. "How long have I got?" "Ten," the doctor says sadly. "Ten?" the man asks. "Ten what? Months? Weeks? What?!" The doctor interrupts, "Nine..."

A man hasn't been feeling well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete check-up. Afterward, the doctor comes out with the results. "I'm afraid I have some very bad news," the doctor says. "You're dying, and you don't have much time left." "Oh, that's terrible!" says the man. "How long have I got?" "Ten," the doctor says sadly. "Ten?" the man asks. "Ten what? Months? Weeks? What?!" The doctor interrupts, "Nine..."

• बंता: यार हिंदी भी अजीब भाषा है!
  संता: वोह कैसे?
  बंता: घडी ख़राब हो तो कहते है "बंद है" और लड़की ख़राब हो तो कहते है " चालू है"

   

संता : एक खुशखबरी है बंता मैं और मेरी प्रेमिका शादी कर रहे है!
बंता : अच्छी बात है कब कर रहे हो शादी?
संता : मेरी 7 दिसम्बर को और उसकी 13 जनवरी को!

• संता : बताओ इंसान के बच्चों और जानवरों के बच्चों में क्या फर्क है ?
  बंता : गधे का बच्चा बड़ा होकर गधा बनता हैं!
  उल्लू का बच्चा उल्लू बनता है!
  पर इंसान का बच्चा बड़ा होकर गधा भी बन सकता है और उल्लू भी !

   

Sharrma ji, eh acchi baat nahi hai; mera joke room aapne dekh liya ! yahan se mai chutkule churata tha, aap churane lage? jo chutkule aapne churaye hain unhe mai reject  karke chala aaya tha!