Domestic violence need help

1. It is not OK for husband to physically or verbally abuse you. You have right to a physically and emotionally safe environment to live. 
2. I wish Indian courts were able to solve the problem of Domestic Violence without breaking families. Sad reality is that the slow and ineffective legal system increases frustration, bitterness and eventually destroys relationship between husband and wife. 
3. It is better to get divorce and leave abusive relationship. 
4. Another option is to go for marriage counselling and try to rebuild trust in relationship.
5. Going to court with DV case will help you get maintenance, right to stay in your home and protection from further physical abuse. This is good option if eventually you want divorce and financial security. It is not so good option if you want to save marriage.

So he was not a habitual drinker.Why didn't U make efforts to change his attitude when he was drunk that too occassionally.Ego's misunderstandings and communication gaps are quite common in marital lives,but they should not be stretched beyond control,which ultimately reaches a saturation point.

Still I sense a remote possibility of a reunion with proper mediation and counselling.Running after police stations and courts not only takes away UR time and money but also a part of UR life.Both of U have forgotten the future of UR daughter born out of the wedlock.

The above experts/advocates have given you good advice. If you want to rebuild your marriage then you need to stay away from the police stations and not encourage your family or brothers to encourage you to file a case. But remember you should not take physical or mental abuse from any person including your husband. If you think that the relationship cannot be rebuilt or that your abusive husband will not change his bad habits or his abusive nature, then you should file a DV case. The decision is entirely yours we can only suggest or advise or provide alternative options.

The above experts/advocates have given you good advice. If you want to rebuild your marriage then you need to stay away from the police stations and not encourage your family or brothers to encourage you to file a case. But remember you should not take physical or mental abuse from any person including your husband. If you think that the relationship cannot be rebuilt or that your abusive husband will not change his bad habits or his abusive nature, then you should file a DV case. The decision is entirely yours we can only suggest or advise or provide alternative options.

Men do drink, but you are talking as if drinking is his full time job and beating you is on contract basis.  

 

Have you ever asked why he drinks?  Have you tried to know root cause? The root cause is you. You give birth to girl child, surely he willl be upset, but you have to make him undrstand that male himself is responsible for birth of girl child and women are not to be held responsible.

 

And I dont believe that he simply hits you, you will takl back, you will argue, putting ghee to fire.  I have not met a single man in my career of 5 years where, a man hits his wife without any reason, most of the time it is coz of nonstop jabbering and bickering and taunting does male raise his hand on woman. 

 

Why dont you correct your attitude and behaviour and then see a sea of change in his behaviour?

 

Dont file DV case, doing like that you will spoil your own life.

 

A husband drunkard or not, wife needs husband, this is India, remember.

Forget small quarells.Life is very little. so enjoy life together. Husband & wife living together is keeping good health. Women's health is more strongly impacted than men's by marital conflict or satisfaction, such that unhappily married women do not enjoy better health relative to their single counterparts,

1. No matter what factors have contributed to bad behavior of husband, physical abuse is not acceptable in any form by anybody.
2. Do not resign yourself to accepting physical abuse.
3. Try to find an effective way to resolve problem.
4. Legal system in India is ineffective.

Dnt file any case if you want to save your marriage. Once you file any case it will ends with divorce. Sister do one thing just record when he beats you and harass you. Save all your medical papers . Try to hold his hand when he is beating you. One day when all your patience loose file DV with the help of evidence. I know it will end with divorce but every person has tolerance limit. No husband has right to beat his wife. Only because we are girls we have to tolerate all beating. No . Now he is beating occasionally but soon if you dnt control or oppose him he may beats you regularly. Dnt tolerate if he beats you continously it is better to live alone than to live in abusive relationship .

Dnt file any case if you want to save your marriage. Once you file any case it will ends with divorce. Sister do one thing just record when he beats you and harass you. Save all your medical papers . Try to hold his hand when he is beating you. One day when all your patience loose file DV with the help of evidence. I know it will end with divorce but every person has tolerance limit. No husband has right to beat his wife. Only because we are girls we have to tolerate all beating. No . Now he is beating occasionally but soon if you dnt control or oppose him he may beats you regularly. Dnt tolerate if he beats you continously it is better to live alone than to live in abusive relationship .

I am only asking expert opinion about the legal proceeding. If you are not a legal expert please do not come to advice me. I know the general things.

You have to file DV case in court. If court gives protection orders in your favor and husband beats you even after that, then arrest of husband is possible. Protection orders can take atleast 1 year of regular hearings in court, you will need lawyer to represent you for drafting documents as well as arguments in front of judge.