Further, it is not clear to me whether you are interested in divorce or not. if you are interested for divorce, the best for you is mutual divorce, under sec 13b of hma.
"13B. Divorce by mutual consent.
(1)Subject to the provisions of this Act a petition for dissolution of marriage by a decree of divorce may be presented to the district court by both the parties to a marriage together, whether such marriage was solemnized before or after the commencement of the Marriage Laws (Amendment) Act, 1976, (68 of 1976.) on the ground that
they have been living separately for a period of one year or more,
that they have not been able to live together and
that they have mutually agreed that the marriage should be dissolved.
(2) On the motion of both the parties made not earlier than six months after the date of the presentation of the petition referred to in sub-section (1) and not later than eighteen months after the said date, if the petition is not withdrawn in the meantime, the court shall, on being satisfied, after hearing the parties and after making such inquiry as it thinks fit, that
a marriage has been solemnized and
that the averments in the petition are true,
pass a decree of divorce declaring the marriage to be dissolved with effect from the date of the decree"
so far i understood you both are highly educated and financially self dependent. then either you take divorce or started living with him ie, consumate the marriage. every moment of a life is precious, quite unnecessarily, we should not waste it. could you bring your hubby in this club, by which we can get a chance to talk to her?
do you have any knowledge about his complain - if any?
can you not talk with him? will he displeased for it?
please you take initiative to break the ice. that will be more frutile.