Help to remove my wife from my house

Relationship between my parents and my wife:  She loved them as if they were her parents. She used to cook whenever we visited them in Chennai and took care on them.

My wife is from a well settled family. But she never behaved so.  She is very simple.

What more you or your parents can aspire for?

I tend to add to version of Dr Ramani

He has already expressed what more they want. 

A house in Bangalore and money……………..followe3d by more demands as long as either of them doe not die.

There is an old saying that barabar mein he kijiye biah bair our preet. As narrated by him it appears that his in-laws agreed for a socially less prosperous family and are now paying for it.

So first I stopped going to her home. Then I never allowed her to see her parents.  Once in 6 months I allowed her to go home.  I told her to restrict her talks with her parents. Arguments came between us, fight and at last she sacrificed for me all. But I came to know once I am gone to office she used to sit and talk with her parents without my knowing. There were fights between us. Male ego that wife should obey the words of her husband.

Do you think all these were right on your part? You yourself admit that it was your male ego.

I tend to add to version of Dr Ramani

He is right.  Dowry beyond paying capacity of girls parent does not come in platter.  Their daughter has to be tortured only then they pay The persons with this bent of mind do not think what they did is wrong.

Whatever I asked my wife, I got within a week from her parents, all house hold items. Then my parents told me to ask them for a house in Bangalore and money.

She and her parents were doing everything to please you. But your parents were greedy and unreasonable. They wanted even more.

I tend to add to version of Dr Ramani

A typical dowry greedy behavior.

What about living in a very large house either at Great Northern Trunk Road, Off NH 5 in Chennai or another large house between Shalom charuch and Hosa lake in Banglore

Her parents said they were not interested as I was looking their daughter well and they can’t do anything more.  These things came as big problem between us.  I beat her a lot. I threw her out of the house. Neighbours called police and complained’

If she and her parents got disgusted with you and your parents’ demands, was it not justified? According to me a husband who beat his wife only once is a despicable creature. Even your neighbours, who were only third parties got enraged and called the police.

I tend to add to version of Dr Ramani

People with this bent of mind do not like resenting dowry demand.

She excused us in that situation also.  

What a nice and innocent girl?

I tend to add to version of Dr Ramani

No she is stupid woman

But my parents not ready to take a girl who went to police station. So they asked me to leave her in Bangalore and come back to native place.

Please think for yourself. It was your neighbours who went to the police. Even if she or her parents had gone to the Police they cannot be blamed.

I tend to add to version of Dr Ramani.

People with this bent of mind do not like resenting dowry demand.

They do not reaslie that place for such paraetns in actually in prison only and she is merciful

  I left her. She came to Chennai to see me I never allowed her inside home.

This shows that you and your parents were really bad people. Can one imagine? A young girl and that too, the wife of their son leaves Bangalore and comes to Chennai. But they do not allow her inside the house. What kind of people are you?

I tend to add to version of Dr Ramani

Stupid lady. She does not know she has to dial 100 and police has a duty to facilitate her forced entry.

She complained to the women’s station in Bangalore saying I never allowed her inside. I told them I am going to apply for divorce.

You may apply for divorce, which you may or may not get. But until then she is your wife and she has  a right.

I tend to add to version of Dr Ramani

Stupid lady. She can have all of them in Jail and live along in the house.

She called me many times, said what I was doing was wrong and that she would fight for her rights.  She filed complaint under 498a. I got arrested. I was in jail for 5 days and now on bail.

Were you not doing the wrong things? She is very much justified if she fights for her rights. Hers was a genuine complaint under 498A. She respected you as her husband. But you crushed her.

I tend to add to version of Dr Ramani

And he misused bail for attacking her in house.

He has so far not replied whether parents are also accused anad arrested or he is only their sacrificial goat.

After coming out I forced her to vacate the house.  She refused.

While she was not at home, I broke the door and try to shift home two times.  Neighbours informed police and stopped.

After you came out of the jail you started taking vengeance. Again your neighbours had to come to her rescue. If I were her father, I would have approached the court for cancellation of your bail. And you will be in jail until the case is disposed of and the time you spend in jail is set off against the punishment awarded to you.

I tend to add to version of Dr Ramani

Stupid lady. This event was sufficient for applying for bail concellation and filing fresh case on him.

After seeing all this how my parents will accept her? They don’t like her.

It should have been the other way. How could she accept her brute parents-in-law?

I tend to add to version of Dr Ramani

Your wife is not morally justified in accepting your parents.  But her bahaviour as narrated by you is stupidily liberal and she may do the stupidity of respecting your parents if you decided to reconcile and mend your way.

I want to keep my parents happy. Now please suggest what i can do, how to remove her?

You are blind and you are under the spell of your misplaced filial obligations. I hope you understand what I say.

You parents do not deserve your concern for their happiness. If you meekly obey them whether right or wrong you have no salvation. And they have no salvation.

On the other hand if you take a tough stand and make them understand that they are unreasonable, they will come round in due course of time. You cut off your relationship with them for some time. They will come round and you, your wife, your parents, her parents all will be happy.

I warn you, if your wife and in-laws pursue 498A, you are sure to get punishment. Your neighbours in Bangalore are witnesses against you. If the complaint is extended even your parents could be hauled up.

If you are forced for a settlement in the end, you will lose everything, including a chance for a happy life with a good wife.

I tend to add to version of Dr Ramani

DO YOUR PARENTS WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY ?

WE HAVE READ STORY  OF SHRAVAN KUMAR SERVING HIS PARENTS

BUT DO NOT UNDERSTAND THAT HIS PARENTS NEVER ASKED HIM TO TORTURE HIS WIFE FOR DOWRY DEMAND AND DID NOT FORCE THE NEIGHBOURS TO CALL POLICE TO ABATE THE TORTURE.

I think even law is helpless in his case. He knows very well that he is doing the wrong things. Still he will continue to do the same wrong things because otherwise his parents won't be happy. Is there a provision in law to jail his parents for life, keep the son out but with a ban on his visiting or communicating with his parents in jail. Under such a situation he may be a good boy and a good husband.

And where shall we place his wife in our mythology Sati, Savitri, Sheelavati. No all these women served only their husbands. Can someone suggest the name of a woman in mythology who dutifully looked after her brute parents-in-law?

or can anyone suggest any lady in mythology who refused to oppose dowry demand.

To  Housewife

He doesn't know Hindi. Tell him in English or Tamil. He is willing to give the telephone number of his wife. Get it from him and talk to her. Tell her to show him some mercy in the court. After all he will still be her husband in the court and in the jail thereafter.

To Ajay

When you are called to court the judge will ask you "Do you plead guilty?". You reply "Yes my Lord."