Pension office, mumbai - dodgers

I am a lady soon to retire, but since 1991 staying separate from my husband (married 1990) and have single handedly brought up my daughter, she is 27 now. The Pension office is demanding "a letter from spouse - stating we are staying separate and not connected in any way" and 2ndly since my daughter is above 25 she cannot be the legal heir, in that case whats the next alternative. Please help, much appreciate knowing the relevant clauses to such issue enable speak with my office/ pension office too. THANK YOU.