(Guest)

Re-applying for a appropriate legal advice

(this is wht was my prior post..pls give me some legal advice....plssssss...i love my wife very much))))

hello members,

iam 28 yrs old man.my parents expired 10 yrs back when i was 18..from then i was staying with my grandmother and my uncle n aunt.

on 21/06/2010..i got married to a girl..it was an arranged marriage and all ceremonies took place at my grandmothers house..i married her without taking or demanding any dowry..after marriage my wife

was witholding s*x by saying that she needs some time for it...i respected her and gave her time for it..we lived for 5 days at my grandmas house..then we went to honeymoon but the

same problem also persisted there...i tried my best to explain relationship of husband n wife to her and to gave her more time as she demanded but the tension n frusturation started to build in me which

started small fights between us...but whenever i tried to talk to her to solve the problems she used to speak loudly n create a scene which used to embarasse me and further lead me to frusturation..

any how we returned from honeymoon after 10 days..we went to my grandmas place as our all cothes n stuff was there..she was still witholding s*x for unknown reasons to me...so i disclosed this problem to my family...

next day she had a fight with me and called her father who took her to her house without talking to me or asking me whats the real problem..i was really pissed off by this...then her father arranged a panchayat/biradari and called me there...

my wife was already there and was blaming me for many false reasons like i use to beat her,im a drug addict...it made me mad but i remained quiet bcs i wanted to save my marriage as i loved my wife...at that meeting my wife n her family demanded that the girl wants to live seperately

with her husband and not with my family...i told them that it has nothing to do with my family and whtever the issue is its between me n my wife..but they forced me to leave my grandmas house...so i took my wife to a different city and we started living there...still she was witholding s*x

for unknown reasons ...by this time one month have passed since our marriage...i was depressed,tensed and mentally disturbed bcs of all this sh*t...due to this there used to be fights between us..she also used to have problem if any of my relative used to call me on phone...one day we had a fight over a small issue and again she called her father and her brother to our house..

they without talking to me took her with them and also took all her stuff including clothes n gold n everything...i was very disturbed..i went to my grandmas house...next day their whole family came outside my grandmas house n started abusing me n my family with very very bad words..and also threathened me

me with false 498a case and several other cases..i was going through a hell ride at that time..i was ready to go to jail n fight as i knew that i never did anything wrong..but my wifes family again formed a panchayat and demanded 6 lacs rupees..to save my old grandmother n my uncle n aunt i gave them this money and we were

divorced by signing stamp papers on 06/08/2010..so in total i lived with my wife for 40 days..i loved my wife so much but was forced for this seperation n forced to give money...

anyhow a big sh*t happened with me but on 12/01/2010..i recieved a call from my wife in which she abused me and my family...but she told me that she had love for me in her heart but she doesnt wants to live with me...i saw a ray of hope in it and since then till today i had sent a lot of relatives n friends to her house for

reconciliation..but everytime they refused...iam under a huge mental tension n depression..i cant understand whts the real problem and why r they doing this sh*t to me...i even told them to accept their all demands whtever they want bcs i want to save my marriage...now one yr period of after marriage is going to get completed on 21 june 2011...

but i still dont wanna divorce my wife..i want to live life with my wife with love n respect...so i need advice regarding many things....is that divorce which panchayat did is legal???secondly the money i gave to them i have its reciept..in which the amnt is not mentioned but its mentioned that i have given all streedhan back to my wife...now i paid

alimony before courts divorce...is it in my favour or in their favour????thirdly...should i file rcr????wht should i do...pls suggest a way to save my marriage..pls.

Reply Follow

7 Replies

(Guest)

Hi..u won't get the proper advice here.plz post your query in expert section

after some time it would be flooded with many irrelevant posts scolding your wife.

1 Like

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner ) 29 May 2011

Originally posted by :utpala kaur
"	Hi..u won't get the proper advice here.plz post your query in expert section after some time it would be flooded with many irrelevant posts scolding your wife.	"

@ Utpala

If you are not a Lawyer then kindly keep quite instead of suggesting above. Lawyers reply to all forums including Experts thread. Do not disrespect a free forum which is giving a platform to you to speak un-moderated.

@ Author

1. is that divorce which panchayat did is legal???
Take: If it is not customary then it is not legal divorce.

2. secondly the money i gave to them i have its reciept..in which the amnt is not mentioned but its mentioned that i have given all streedhan back to my wife...
Take: That can be used as Evidence at appropriate stage subject to cross examination of parties with appropriate produced witnesses.

3. now i paid alimony before courts divorce...is it in my favour or in their favour????
Take: Subject to cross examination it may become material records to use at appropriate stage.

4. thirdly...should i file rcr????
Take: To an unwilling spouse RCR is not the appropriate remedy and in non Execution stage it may become matter of Divorce decree to her easily.

5. wht should i do...pls suggest a way to save my marriage
Take: To an unwilling spouse a marriage cannot be saved by Court. Least two spouse will not get a decree in divorce and or rcr proceedings yet live in seperation.

Legally no Court can compel your wife to cohabit without her free will with you nor you can make her cohabit with you at given 6 L and or at gun point and or by changing city / location and or by any societal act other than destined will of God! Try counseling her via neutral third party mediation without making her aware it was proposed by you.

1 Like

(Guest)

I don't think the 498a and DV cases stand strong against you if filed after 1yr of seperation. she is really making foul of you...and taking advantage of your weakness....so be bold and ask her consent for mutual divorce if she wants to end the marriage. If she not agree for Mutual Divorce, file RCR and wait for results...if you get divorce notice .. contest it !! Before filing RCR, try to have telephonic talk with her in detail...and record it. If possible also try to have meeting with her & family at your place and video record it secretly.

DEFENSE ADVOCATE.-firmaction@g (POWER OF DEFENSE IS IMMENSE ) 29 May 2011

yes this section is flooded with people who just for ego give advice whether they know or not.

(Guest)

thank you members...but its very difficult to let someone go whom u love so much and its also very true that it still hurts a lot ...but thanks to mr.498a ipc which made it all possible...only name of this 498a can destroy someones life...

(Guest)

Thanks Tajob and sonu for keeping dignity of the forum.Many threads asking legal advice by people in trouble went unanswered.

@ Tajb

And I am not a lawyer so I did not give a legal advice as this problem is beyond my general knowledge and I dont feel shame in learning.Thanks

YOGESHWAR. (ADVOCATE HIGH COURT-criminal /civil -youract@gmail.com) 29 May 2011

people who give multiple replies in one or two words without knowing any thing about the problem are absent on office holidays. So it is their pastime to use office facilities for this purpose.