sathishkumar 23 June 2017

Wife is not interested in having physical relationship

I got married in June 2016, it was an arranged marriage, our both families live in coimbatore, i work for a software company in bangalore. my wife is not working. we live in a rented house in bangalore. since the first day, the problems started to occur, she is not interested in having s*x and it continued, we have taken her to counselling with a psychiatrist and a gynaecologist and found out her hormone reports are normal. but she is psychologically not interested in having a physical relationship. she says her parents forced her to marry. once she has attempted a suicide with a note leaving "that no one is responsible for her action". i took her to hospital and gave treatment and sent her back home. Then we along with our relatives went to their home and talked about the issue, there she was keeping quiet. after leaving her in her home for 2 months, their parents called and asked us to take her back. we both went back to bangalore again. she is always reluctant in having any sort of physical relationship and I didnt force her though.I cleary explained their parents about the situation in the phone. After some days she said she is ready to try, while at the situation when we ready to try, she says dont touch anywhere and didnt not allow me to do anything, I got frustrated and shouted at her (she has recorded my conversations in her phone, later i came to know) and the next day, I left her back in home. we along with our relative went to their house and asked for a divorce. While we were talking, she showed one of my relative a recording that she has recorded in which I was shouting, scolding. Now their family is not ready to come for a divorce. What shall I do in this situation?

Can I send them a legal notice asking for a mutual divorce with the help of lawyer?

And proceed to file for divorce on the grounds of the marriage not being consummated if they are not ready for mutual divorce?

We have all the medical reports ( counselling, gynacelogist harmone FSH test reports, suicide attemp discharge summary and her suicde note)

With the recording can she take any action against us in case if we file for a divorce?

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6 Replies

Ms.Usha Kapoor (CEO) 24 June 2017

Mere shouting by you doesn't prove anything. Try one more time to meet her.You call her and take her to another well reputed Psychiatrist If she has some problem with her phobia for s*x he would find out. and treat her.Once she is successfully treated your problem of not having physical relations with her is solved and you can drop the idea of divorce from your mind. If still she behaves in the same way and the docter says there is no problem with her . If still she refuses physical intimacy with you you again ask her the reason for not having physical relationship with you.If she doesn't answer your question you decide to divorce her.As you said MCD is best. Otherwise go for contested divorce on the ground of Marriage not consummated.You both can visit marriage counseller also prior to moving for divorce.

Sudhir Kumar, Advocate (Advocate) 24 June 2017

Originally posted by : Ms.Usha Kapoor
	Mere shouting by you doesn't prove anything. Try one more time to meet her.You call her and take her to aPsychiatrist.If he also says there is no problem with her psychiatrically you again ask her the reason for not having physical relationship with you.If she doesn't answer your question you decide to divorce her.As you said MCD is best. Otherwise go for contested divorce on the ground of Marriage not consummated.

Agreed. You have not disclosed the contents of shouting and it is not possible to comment on the validity of your cause for worry.

Sudhir Kumar, Advocate (Advocate) 24 June 2017

You need to hve divorce. MCD or contested. Do not ever (never) commit the mistake of sending a notice of RCR which many persons will advise you.

Beware. MArriage is not more than 7 year old. If her suicide attemept (even if in parent house) is successful her parent shave to utter dowry harasssement and you have to prove innosence or go to jail for 7(+) years (with/without family)

(Guest)

She must have been in love with someone else, and swore not to have s*x with anyone else. Hence she is behaving like this. You talk to her and ask if she is willing for divorce, take mutual divorce. If she is not interested in s*x, then marriage is not conssumated. On this basis you can file for nullification of marriage, as you did not have s*x with her at all.

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Dr J C Vashista (Advocate) 24 June 2017

You have already suffered for about 12 months, it is enough.

Instead of filing mutual consent divorce move for annulment of marriage on the ground it has not so far been consumated, which shall save you from the divorcee status.

Consult and engage a local lawyer for proper proceeding.