RCR/ DIVORCE

Thanks Prabhakaran for your advise. Even i was surprised listeing that how bluntly and fearlessly my husband is stating this infront of the judge that he wants to end this marriage at any cost and has filed RCR only to safegaurd his family. But since this is a family case, The Judge must have thought to give him a second chance and see if my husband gets ready to continue with this marriage. And thats why I have decided that in the coming hearing, If my husband will deny to take me along, I will request the honable' Megistrate to dismiss this case and write this on his notings that it was filed by my husand with wrong intentions. I am still silent and not taking any action against him since i still want to give this marriage another chnace but in case my husband will deny it in the coming hearing and when the Judge will get the case dismissed, It will make grounds for me to get justice for myself and fight for my rights.

He and his family are not ready to compromise on anything , not ready to even talk to me or any of my family members and are just stating to everyone that they want to end this marriage. I am not sure of the reason but I know they are greedy people and they must have found another prey who would be ready to give dowry to meet their demands.Since there is no ground for my husband to get contested divorce from me and he knows i will never get ready fora  mutual one, My only concern is:

1. If still there is another way he can file for divorce? If yes, on what grounds?

2. How long can i defer the divorce by not giving my consent (signing on the divorce papers)?

3. He filed RCR in August, 2010 so legally we are not living together since August 2010, so will this period be counted for a ground of divorce if we still dont get to live together untill August 2011 (completing 1 year of not living together)?

4. My husband's family is pressurizing me stating that they would make my give divorce by having my husband marry another woman in between. If he does so will he be liable for any prosecution?

Please advise..

First an order should be made in the RCR application. The 1 year limitation period of non-compliance of the order will run from the date of judgement so this period which you have stated will not be taken into account..

I dont know how your husband was so frank in saying that he wants to divorce you during the pendancy of the RCR application. This is the first time i am hearing this... Very weird....

If he is a Muslim, then i dont think that marrying another girl during pendancy of matrimonial dispute will attract any criminal prosecution... If this is the case, then your contention that he is threatening you will not have any effect...

Members correct me if i am wrong...

No Javid Sir, we are not muslim but belong to Punjabi culture and yes, you are correct it sounds wierd but this is a true example of how people misuse the laws. We blame girls for misusing acts like 498A but this is a classic example that shows that we still have a biased society and even law has not remained untouched. Thats the reason that even the honable' Megistrate could not pin-point my husband when he said openly that he wants to end this marriage despite of RCR stil in proceedings.

My husaband has actually misused the RCR and is still living fearlessly because he knows how much i love him and so will never take any action against him. On one hand he has filed the petition to save this marriage , on other hand has ended all the contacts with his wife and communicating this that he wants to end this marriage at any cost. He and his family are not only making fun of  me and a sacred relation like marriage but of law as well.

Being an educated woman, i am also aware of my rights and what steps can i take to get the justice but still keeping silent in order to make this marriage work and give time to my husband and inlaws so that they realise it at their own whatever wrong are they doing.

However my questions are still pending, request the members of this forum to advise me at the earliest::

1. If still there is another way he can file for divorce? If yes, on what grounds?

2. How long can i defer the divorce by not giving my consent (signing on the divorce papers)?

3. He filed RCR in August, 2010 so legally we are not living together since August 2010, so will this period be counted for a ground of divorce if we still dont get to live together untill August 2011 (completing 1 year of not living together)?

4. My husband's family is pressurizing me stating that they would make my give divorce by having my husband marry another woman in between. If he does so will he be liable for any prosecution?

Women wrong , men right; women emotional fools, men rational, intellectual and logical: these are the stereotypes on which patriarchy thrives!

@ Mr.Prabhakar, great inputs. Thanks!! just one question (though might not be related to this case). If the husband cites few acts of cruelty after RCR was filed, can he withdraw it?

Thanks Prabhakar Sir for your valuable inputs one more time, it really helped me think and decide which direction can i move if  he gets ready to join me/ if he doesnt gets ready to join me. Your advise helped me clear my doubts. Atleast this is for sure that he can not get divorce from me unless i give my mutual consent which i will never give and also what rights do i have to get justice being his legal wife.

@ Prabhakar sir, If the wife and parents take back their articles and create a huge scene in front of the public after RCR was filed, the we the huband can withdraw the RCR correct?

Mr. Anonymous and Mr.498A victim,  this discussion was initiated by me as i am suffering due to the misuse of RCR by my husband and his family. Your questions do not pertain to my case. Please start with another discussion on the respective topics you want to get the inputs. I have joined this forum since as of now there is no other way for me to get information around RCR and the grounds of divorce (if my husband wants to take). Please spare this discussion since your queries are actually not serving my purpose and diverting the thoughts. Thanks

Dear 498A victim, I guess i need not to clarify this to you what were the reasons for the rift between my husband and me and why he left me. What i have gone through and facing currently is all my business and not yours. And whether im right or wrong, I have my conscience to tell me, you need not to clarify. Would apprecaite if we can end this discussion here and like i said earlier its better if you dont intervene on a issue when you know you cant provide any useful input.

Thanks..

well said Member account -deleted - advocate

well said Member -  deleted - account

I don't agree. many women are misusing law now a days. may be few women are not... But most men are suffering from being inncoent and law is not properly made for neutral gender... I am also inncoent victim here and I have n't done anything wrong and my wife harrassing me, my family members even after she put divorce with huge alimony.... I would advice indian men never ever marry indian women...... you need to get bail first before marriage... I love my wife very much But she is exploting me and my family members... just 4 months she lived and threatened me with police in UK. I requested her many times and begged her. also her family members.. my parents went to her house and requested her family to send her daughter to my house in UK. They ill treated our elderly parents and my father passed with this pain in his heart..... I am the eldest and my siblings got fear in marriage..... No marriage is needed in India as long as law for men is not supported.

@Author

I dont buy your story.  Neway if the RCR decree is passed in your husband's favour, then after one year he has every right to file for divorce under desertion. and thats a ground, for that you dont need to sign :-)

If your story is to be believed, then the RCR should be dismissed in the hon. court.