Username12345 (1) 09 March 2016

Urgent guidance

Hi Experts,

Need your urgent advice.

In my 10 yrs of marriage I have stayed with my husband for 3.5yrs and from almost more than 7yrs he is absconding. In these 3.5yrs I was tortured physically and mentally by my Husb and FIL a lot. I have a kid who is 7yrs old and he is with me as husb is absconding. After 4 months of marriage they started torturing me for petty reasons and money issues tht i get from my parents for them to buy assets and that the dowry which we gave ws not sufficient for them and they lost a good match becoz of me who was going to give them 10 lacs.

I was mentally tortured stating tht gas pipe will be removed or kerosene will be poured on me and will tell tht i commited suicide or they will cut each part of my body every day or i will be tied to the tree and not given any food. I wasnt allowed to call my parents and my parents not allowed to either call me or come to meet me, phone was always locked, me and my kid not used to get proper food, i was nt allowed to go out of the house or not allowed to talk to anyone in the neighbourhood.

They used to beat me very badly that once i had a miscarriage at home due to the beatings. Second delivery was also very critical, me n kid were both in ICU. Kid was in ICU for 25 days. Evem after the kid's birth nothing changed. One day they beat me as rice got spoilt. I was beaten so brutually tht i thought im gonna die for sure. Next day my relatives had to come to see me (my parents were in different state). We went to file FIR but police jst sent us the next day for counselling in the CP ofc. My wounds were clearly visible and the officers there scolded him a lot. They took in writing from both of us that we attended the counselling and remaining will be seen in the police station. But police didnt even send me to hosp even though i requested for medical. SI told me to go and have a pain killer and i will be ok the next day.

After that a meeting was called in the panchayath (as my uncle requested to the sarpanch) wherein they cudnt tell any reasons why they used to beat me. All reasons given were petty and eveyone laughed at them for those reasons. At last my husband told my parents that I am mad, I have BP Diabetes and to take me and get treated. He promised he will come after 3 monhths and take me. The panchayath meeting was called the next week. None of them came and we tried to contact and get a hold of them for 2 months but all trials in vain. Atlast we got hold of the person who was acting like a mediation who was their relative and he told me to go and husband will come in 3 months. Respecting the elder person I went to my matrimonial home and 3 months became 3.5 yrs but no response from them.

I tried texting him by sms, emails, letters, calls, giving message to neighbours and relatives but all waste never got reply from them. Infact my husb went absconding I didnt knw his wereabouts. His father just kept on saying he doesnt knw and misguiding us. Also if we went to talk he never allowed me to enter the houses, had fights and used all rubbish language which was filthy. After trying for 3.5 yrs I filed a FIR in their village. One of the lawyers in their village misguided me saying tht he will help me to get out of these issues in just 7 days. But just took money from me and stuck me in filing cases there which i could have filed in my matrimonial place. We filed 498A and DVCC. ITs been 3.5 yrs and DVCC still going on and is at the stage of my cross questioning which didnt happen till now.

Im terribly under lots of pain as every time i have to travel to a different state plus not getting proper help from the lawyers there. I have changed 3 lawyers till now. First one who got me stuck, second who was interested in pulling money frm me and nw got elected in Lok sabha elections, third lawyer is the present lawyer who always speaks very rashly and i dont find him guiding me properly. Infact i feel he has joined the opposite party and just tries to knw what will be my next step. I told the lawyer to speak to the opposite party and try to get the matter setteled outside of court as travelling is really difficult for me.

Right from the start I keep texting my husb for birthday wishes, festival wishes, informing about the kid's health if hez not well (once admitted in ICU), telling him he can come to visit the kid and no one will stop him, asking about his wellness. I didnt get any reply from him till now. 1.5 yrs back I decided that i dont want to live with guy and want divorce. No one helped me so I texted him stating tht there is nothing we are going to gain from court proceedings. Lets sit together deicide and file for mutual divorce and get out of this so that both are happy. But the opposite party mas manipulated the sms and added some more content that i was threatning him. In none of my message have i sent any threatning text instead i loved him a lot even after all this. Till now never thought that something bad should happen to him. I have filed case just to get my rights and proper nyay from the court.

The opposite party lawyer showed all the messages to my lawyer and my lawyer not at all listening to me but just trying to ge rid of me asap. Now I dont knw what to do as lawyer is playing games. Secondly i dont have any evidence of domestic violence as this happened within the four walls of the house. I tried to get copies of the counselling tht happened in the CP ofc which will atleast show that i has wounds on my body. But in CP ofc it seems they dont maintain any such data for counselling. I sked in the police stating and SI too told the same thing. I am shocked as to how come these govt bodies dnt have any records of what had happened.

I consulted one more lawyer in my matimonial place and he asked me to file Divorce and Maitenance together. I do not have my husband's address as he is absonding and has deserted me. I came to knw that he got remarried but no one is helping me to get the proofs. Also some how i traced the company in which he is working but they too not helping me. I am in serious pains and my lilfe has become miserable. Even though I am BCom I am not able to do job becoz of the health issues which came because of stress and physical torture that i had gone thru.

Recently I had a major surgery of the uterus and its seriously difficult to travel soo far and not earning anything. I am depending on my parents for every single paisa. I have a school going kid and he hasnt seen his father yet. I regret on being born as a woman in this country and writing this on Women's day all this,

Please pleases advice me. I want my case to go on fast tracka nd also to get divorced asap. Please give me suggestions.

Thank you.

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4 Replies

(Guest)

Originally posted by : reddy
	Hi Experts, Need your urgent advice. In my 10 yrs of marriage I have stayed with my husband for 3.5yrs and from almost more than 7yrs he is absconding. In these 3.5yrs I was tortured physically and mentally by my Husb and FIL a lot. I have a kid who is 7yrs old and he is with me as husb is absconding. After 4 months of marriage they started torturing me for petty reasons and money issues tht i get from my parents for them to buy assets and that the dowry which we gave ws not sufficient for them and they lost a good match becoz of me who was going to give them 10 lacs. I was mentally tortured stating tht gas pipe will be removed or kerosene will be poured on me and will tell tht i commited suicide or they will cut each part of my body every day or i will be tied to the tree and not given any food. I wasnt allowed to call my parents and my parents not allowed to either call me or come to meet me, phone was always locked, me and my kid not used to get proper food, i was nt allowed to go out of the house or not allowed to talk to anyone in the neighbourhood. They used to beat me very badly that once i had a miscarriage at home due to the beatings. Second delivery was also very critical, me n kid were both in ICU. Kid was in ICU for 25 days. Evem after the kid's birth nothing changed. One day they beat me as rice got spoilt. I was beaten so brutually tht i thought im gonna die for sure. Next day my relatives had to come to see me (my parents were in different state). We went to file FIR but police jst sent us the next day for counselling in the CP ofc. My wounds were clearly visible and the officers there scolded him a lot. They took in writing from both of us that we attended the counselling and remaining will be seen in the police station. But police didnt even send me to hosp even though i requested for medical. SI told me to go and have a pain killer and i will be ok the next day. After that a meeting was called in the panchayath (as my uncle requested to the sarpanch) wherein they cudnt tell any reasons why they used to beat me. All reasons given were petty and eveyone laughed at them for those reasons. At last my husband told my parents that I am mad, I have BP Diabetes and to take me and get treated. He promised he will come after 3 monhths and take me. The panchayath meeting was called the next week. None of them came and we tried to contact and get a hold of them for 2 months but all trials in vain. Atlast we got hold of the person who was acting like a mediation who was their relative and he told me to go and husband will come in 3 months. Respecting the elder person I went to my matrimonial home and 3 months became 3.5 yrs but no response from them. I tried texting him by sms, emails, letters, calls, giving message to neighbours and relatives but all waste never got reply from them. Infact my husb went absconding I didnt knw his wereabouts. His father just kept on saying he doesnt knw and misguiding us. Also if we went to talk he never allowed me to enter the houses, had fights and used all rubbish language which was filthy. After trying for 3.5 yrs I filed a FIR in their village. One of the lawyers in their village misguided me saying tht he will help me to get out of these issues in just 7 days. But just took money from me and stuck me in filing cases there which i could have filed in my matrimonial place. We filed 498A and DVCC. ITs been 3.5 yrs and DVCC still going on and is at the stage of my cross questioning which didnt happen till now. Im terribly under lots of pain as every time i have to travel to a different state plus not getting proper help from the lawyers there. I have changed 3 lawyers till now. First one who got me stuck, second who was interested in pulling money frm me and nw got elected in Lok sabha elections, third lawyer is the present lawyer who always speaks very rashly and i dont find him guiding me properly. Infact i feel he has joined the opposite party and just tries to knw what will be my next step. I told the lawyer to speak to the opposite party and try to get the matter setteled outside of court as travelling is really difficult for me. Right from the start I keep texting my husb for birthday wishes, festival wishes, informing about the kid's health if hez not well (once admitted in ICU), telling him he can come to visit the kid and no one will stop him, asking about his wellness. I didnt get any reply from him till now. 1.5 yrs back I decided that i dont want to live with guy and want divorce. No one helped me so I texted him stating tht there is nothing we are going to gain from court proceedings. Lets sit together deicide and file for mutual divorce and get out of this so that both are happy. But the opposite party mas manipulated the sms and added some more content that i was threatning him. In none of my message have i sent any threatning text instead i loved him a lot even after all this. Till now never thought that something bad should happen to him. I have filed case just to get my rights and proper nyay from the court. The opposite party lawyer showed all the messages to my lawyer and my lawyer not at all listening to me but just trying to ge rid of me asap. Now I dont knw what to do as lawyer is playing games. Secondly i dont have any evidence of domestic violence as this happened within the four walls of the house. I tried to get copies of the counselling tht happened in the CP ofc which will atleast show that i has wounds on my body. But in CP ofc it seems they dont maintain any such data for counselling. I sked in the police stating and SI too told the same thing. I am shocked as to how come these govt bodies dnt have any records of what had happened. I consulted one more lawyer in my matimonial place and he asked me to file Divorce and Maitenance together. I do not have my husband's address as he is absonding and has deserted me. I came to knw that he got remarried but no one is helping me to get the proofs. Also some how i traced the company in which he is working but they too not helping me. I am in serious pains and my lilfe has become miserable. Even though I am BCom I am not able to do job becoz of the health issues which came because of stress and physical torture that i had gone thru. Recently I had a major surgery of the uterus and its seriously difficult to travel soo far and not earning anything. I am depending on my parents for every single paisa. I have a school going kid and he hasnt seen his father yet. I regret on being born as a woman in this country and writing this on Women's day all this, Please pleases advice me. I want my case to go on fast tracka nd also to get divorced asap. Please give me suggestions. Thank you.

Jagan felt very sad reading your story.

My prayers are with you.

You have filed whatever cases you can, now that your husband is absconding, he wont come to table. Texting him is of no use. When you file 498a what use telling happy birthday etc, both don’t go hand in hand, both are contradictory.

As you have already known, lawyers are like this only, only rarely there are ethical lawyers. Finding good lawyer is equal to finding good husband.

If you want cases to go on fast track, you need to file application 21b in High court, sadly for that also you need lawyer. After that in 6 months case will be over at any cost.

Jagan today is very sad reading all the above which you have written.

Username12345 (1) 10 March 2016

Thank you experts for the advice.

Username12345 (1) 10 March 2016

Hi Experts some more advice needed.

Please help.

Adv.Yashwardhan Tiwari (Advocate IPR Associate ) 12 March 2016

It is really shocking that a father of child is not caring even for his infant child. I understood your intentions are fair and is idealistic. In such situation i will suggest you to take a plea of mediation before judge through your lawyer. Now a days govt had appointed mediators who on request of lawyers representing couples tries to settle family dispute out of court.

Second option you have is to submitt evidence of cruelty which can be proven by way of statements of close relative. Even i would suggest if you can recall any person who attended panchayat meeting will also be enough in cross examination your lawyer will be able to take out his statement.

Don't worry you have good case. If you can ask court to direct your husband to provide maintenance byattaching his property for upbringing of your child it will be a good relief and punishment for husband. For any more queries please feel free

Adv.Yashwardhan

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