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Alka (Housewife)     09 December 2013

498a vs rcr vs divorce

Dear expert members, 

 

Please advice on my case. 

1. Married in August 2012. Stayed at In laws place for 6 months when husband left for job to USA

2. Mental harassment at In laws place for dowry and projected that Husband salary is not enough for living in USA

3. My parents strive hard to send me to US through mediation. Finally landed in US in Feb hoping for better life. Mother in law accompanied me to US by saying she will help me till i adjusted. 

4. I came to know that my husband is chain smoker and alcoholic. Mother in law supported his habits.  And on top of that she never allowed me to talk to my husband personally. Physical and mental torture for 5 months. I can write 10 pages here.

5. After my repeated requests, my brother came to US to get me to India. My brother has to involve local police here to get my passport. They helped me to secure my passport and warned my husband to go to India to solve our family matters. 

6. Since July,  My father, brother, local relatives trying their best to ask my husband and mother in law to come and settle the issue.  and all efforts are not yielding any results. They are so stubborn to say that I have no place in this world except his feet. 

Few more details:

Education : Msc

Age : 26

Father background : upper middle class

Dowry: 10 lacs + 240 gram gold

Everybody in the village knows the fact that my husband family is very crooked minded.  My family and me are repenting ourselves for engaging with them. 

I want to move away and lead a happy life.   Please suggest the best possible way to reverse my situation by getting divorce and dowry back.

Please help me on What options i have now?

1. Filing 498 a , 2. File RCR  or 3. File Divroce

Thanks

Alka



Learning

 7 Replies

Sashvitha (xxxxxxx)     09 December 2013

Dear Alka,

   Im not  a lawyer.But I went through the same situation but took 4 years for me to realize that my husband's family is behind my money.I would suggest you to go for a 498A first.Include your in-laws too.If you find any difference you can go for a settlement or else you can go for a divorce.

 

Regards,

Sashvitha

Nadeem Qureshi (Advocate/ nadeemqureshi1@gmail.com)     09 December 2013

you can file 498A, 406, 323of ipc & 3/4 of D.P. Act, Maintenance under section 125 of cr.p.c. Domestic Violence case If you want to live with him then RCR otherwise Divorce. if any child thenchild custody. feel free to call

T. Kalaiselvan, Advocate (Advocate)     10 December 2013

The cruelty you have already been made to experience but you did not raise your voice then for the reasons best known to you;,the dowry amount given by your father despite his hardships was to make sure that you live a very happy married life but the dreams shattered, ofcourse for no fault of yours, but your father has done a mistake by giving such a big amount as dowry indicating that he was ready to do anything for the sake of his daughter's future life, but where and how?, Now, if your in-laws do not arrive at an amicable solution, you have nothing to do except for initiating the legal process against the erring people, a woman is fully protected by Indian laws against all such atrocities and you know what are they as well(?), in my opinion, if you have decided to not to continue your married life anymore with him especially with the given situation, it is better to part your ways with him through a divorce, consult your elders and take a decision which will give you actual relief, do not go by passions, sentiments, fantasies, fancies and whims, do not get misguided by plenty of people who will not at all be interested in your welfare but may voluntarily pass irrelevant opinions on your issues making things more complicated. By RCR what do you think you can claim a relief, by seeking a separate home away from his mother and other relatives(?),  take time, sit alone, recall all that happened in your life, analyse all the pros and cons, think deeply about which and what went wrong and where, if you realize that you too were responsible to some extent for the debacles, give a second thought over the intended legal actions against your husband and his parents and also, about the proposal for divorce, see if things can be set right to save the marriage, if nothing works, seek the help of a marriage counselor/mediator, after that also if the issue remains unsolved, then you may resort to the legal course of action.

Alka (Housewife)     10 December 2013

I am really thankful for taking time to go through my case. Thanks for your replies. 

My intention is to get divorce from him and move on in my life.  and I want get back the dowry. 

1. Right now, They are in USA and I am in India. I got the message that they (Husband + mother in law) will not visit india at any cost. 

2. Can i go for divorce by MCD? or divorce on cruelty grounds?  

Case 1 : After I file divorce, if they don't come to india. a) can they represent with lawyer. b) what happens to divorce? c) what happens to dowry d) maintenance?

Case2 : If they come to india, a) can they oppose divorce? b) what happens to divorce? c) what happens to dowry d)  maintenance?

What is the maximum time, I can expect this to get sorted out?

I am trying my best to search on this forum and other internet resources on divorce. Please point me to the right resources with best explanation.  
 
Thanks
Alka

Alka (Housewife)     10 December 2013

Please advice. 

 

Thanks


(Guest)

Now moving on is not an easy option and definitely not simple. First push maintenance/DV case as hard as you can and then wait and watch for sometime. You will lose some time, but then don't show your eagerness by filing divorce/RCR.  Both are useless in your current scenario. Generally 498a is being used to get the guy to the negotiation table but since your in-laws stay outside the country, it has very limited scope. But then choice is yours. Claim your sthridhan. Give time for negotiation, let him come to the table. Don't file false cases and give him a reason to deny your belongings.


If your husband agree then you can file for MCD. You can also file contested divorce showing cruelty grounds but it takes a thousand years if the party contests it. If they dont come, you will be awarded an ex-parte divorce decree and a way to his remarriage. If you have bills then you can claim stridhan. Maintenance is the right of a non-working woman.


PS: You look like a well educated woman but why are you not working? why you have to give dowry to get married? Always dreaming high huh!! Greedy right!!! At-least now have some self respect and fight for justice.

Alka (Housewife)     10 December 2013

Thank you stalker, 

498a is not an option.  And also, i will stay away from RCR/divorce. 

Few questions just came to my mind as i am ready to give him time to come for negotiation.   

1. Can i file a petition in family court for asking my husband to come to India for resolving disputes? 


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