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Regranter chap (SE)     22 January 2013

Please help - need divorce!!!

 

Hi all,

I am Nuram. I have got some serious problems going on in my life. I was just googgling and found this site and loved this. Thought of posting my problems here and get some valuable suggestions. 


It's me during 2010 Jan met a girl and loved her a lot. I went and told my mom and showed her the pic. My mom liked her and i was very happy with it. 

After couple of months i came to know that she is also keeping an eye on me. mar 2012 it was the day we met and fell in love. I loved her a lot for about a year and then our marriage was fixed on Mar 2012. Till this moment everything was fine. 

She is short tempered and I was ok with it. Never felt it as a problem. I always thought that it was her nature. I always thought that I am lucky to have her in my life.

Tragedy started just 2 weeks before the marriage after all the arrangements were done. She started acting weird even for small small problems. She started losing her temper often and started acting weird. She just used to blast the words out of her mouth inspite of looking around and won’t even care who is standing near her. This worried me a lot. 

I kept silence and marriage happened. The day after marriage happened she started again getting angry. I asked her what's wrong. She said that I am not ready to register the marriage legally. So I have done it the very next day. She kept silent for some days. 

One night, she asked me a question funnily... 'You wouldn't have got any beautiful women than me!!' I funnily replied 'yeah I have many options' in a jolly note. She started again acting totally mad... She slapped me and went out of control. I was not able to do anything. I tried to cool her and was not able to because she was attacking me whenever I go near her to chill her out. After some time, she left me in bedroom locked and went to living room. I was completely scared. 
Morning, I went to the living room and got shocked!!!

All the gifts I gave her went into pieces and were lying in the floor. My god, I don’t know how she managed to break even a ceramic toy. Doll and everything was completely gone. I was really very shocked about her strange behaviour. I informed her parents about this and they advised her. This problem came to an end. 

After a week one day, she called me for a shopping. I told her to wait for 30 mins. Again a strange reaction. I got panic. Just wanted to know where this ends. I stuck to my decision and told her to wait for 30 mins repeatedly. Ohhh god.... She came to me, pulled me out of home and shut the door.  All the neighbours watched including my mom. 


The same day night, she remained silent. I was under full stress. 
All of sudden she started crying and lay down on floor. I tried asking her what the problem is. She remained silent and was nearly unconscious. After 10 mins, she woke up and asked me 'Where am I?' I was puzzled. This is not ending here. I was already frustrated to the core. After 30 mins, she went inside the kitchen. I was sitting in living room. Heard some noise and went inside the kitchen and found that she took a knife. All of a sudden she asked me 'Shall i cut my veins'. She indeed attempted. I rushed and pulled the knife out of her hands and pulled her inside bed room and kept on looking her whole night. 

Next morning, I called her parents and sent her with them. I have told them to counsel her and also added that i am ready to co-operate in any way. 

I am now afraid of being with her, keeping in mind what will happen when. 

 

Months passed. I didn’t hear back anything. I tried contacting them and they were not reachable. I tried calling her dad and there is no response from him either. One day, I and my mom went to her home. It’s just a surprise visit. We had another shock there. My MIL didn’t allow my mom to enter home. Finally, my mom waited outside and I had a conversation with my MIL. I started recording the conversation and the following have been recorded.

  1. Twice threw off the mangal sutra.
  2. Her mom accepted that her daughter took the knife and she also claimed that it is right.
  3. Her mom told that her daughter is no more interested in living with me.
  4. She also said that I betrayed her life. ( I don’t know how!!!)
  5. Recording also holds that I never expected any dowry.

 

After 2 weeks from the conversation with her mother, I called her to know how she was feeling and got that recorded as well. She clearly told that she is not ready to live with me anymore.

 

Recently, couple of weeks back again I had a conversation with her to know what plan she has. She said she need compensation. I told that I’ll discuss with parents and get back. After a while, I got a call from her again and she added that she doesn’t need any compensation at all. She said she doesn’t need my money.


Now the most frustrated thing is neither they are coming with a solution, nor they are responding. I contacted a lawyer and he suggested me to be silent till one year completion. I am in a confused mind of what to do next.

 

After so many happenings, I made my mind that I am not going to accept her again at any ways. Need your suggestion on how to proceed further. Do I have to take any action now or shall I wait for them to come back?

Pals, Any solution from your side will be really helpful to me.



Learning

 23 Replies

Advocate Vishnu (Advocate)     22 January 2013

Pl ask her to give you a divorce by mutual consent .This will easily solve your problem .

piyush (employee)     22 January 2013

Dear Mr. Nuram,

                           You have not mentioned your religion. Even if u/s 14 of Hindu Marriage Act and u/s 29 of Special Marriage Act court can grant divorce in the case of exceptional hardship. However I would recommend you to visit a Psychiatrist along with her. If she is not willing to co-operate than can file a petition in Court of Law for Resistution of Conjugal Rights. If you have already made your decision for Divorce than I suggest get along with it.

 

Thank you,

Piyush Chobe.

Msk-need -nuetral- laws (self)     22 January 2013

very strange indeed!  need to know both of your religious background


(Guest)

Nurman, U pre-acted, and its good u have recoreded each n every conversation. My suggetion, u wait till 1 year, and collect maximum evidence. and last u apply for divorce.

 

 

 

 

 

 

ABHISHEK KUMAR VATSA (Freelancer)     22 January 2013

Atleast try to wait for 1 year and untill then make your case strong  by getting more  evidences in your favour any step taken in haste can harm ur side.


regards

abhi(dot)kumar9law@gmail(dot)com

Rahul Kapoor (Legal Enthusiast)     23 January 2013

u should report to the police stating that she is not living with.

same will help if some false cases will b filed.

neeraj dalal (independent)     23 January 2013

you have to file divorce petition on the ground of cruelty committed by your wife.


(Guest)

Apply for divorce, ask intervention of elders, mom MIL etc and get a consent divorce. Like that you will save some of your manhood.

Regranter chap (SE)     22 April 2013

Hi all,

 

Thanks for all your suggestions. I am almost in the verge of getting my divorce. I got some evidences about her cruelty. Just waiting for the final talks to happen. If the final talks doesn't help, I will file the case under Ground of Cruelty. 

The marriage is not even consummated. That's because she never co-operated. Shall i use this point as ground as well? I need your suggestions pals. 

Also to be on safer side, I did all Andrology test, Penile doppler test for blood flow. It seems to be normal. 

Last week, I went to take the semen Analysis. The Sperm count seemed fine. But its motility and morphology are quite less. Will this be a problem guys? 

Thanks in advance. 

Regranter chap (SE)     22 April 2013

Another Question pops in my head now is do i have to pay any compensation? She is working in a reputed company and earning 30K per month. Sorry for bugging you all with too many questions guys. :(

piyush (employee)     22 April 2013

Dear Mr. NURAM, All the details mentioned above shall not create a hurdle for you to get divorce. The medical test is an add on in your case. I dont know which city you're from. However if you're from Pune or Hyderabad I can provide legal assistance in this matter. However you try and act fast giving her less time for preparation. My no. 09890549359

Regranter chap (SE)     23 April 2013

Thanks for all your suggestions pals. 

Marriage is not consummated since she was not co-opeative. Now they are complaining to my parents that i am impotent. 

I rushed to the top most s*xologist and got andrology panel test and penile doppler test. Everything looked fine. ( They don't know that I have taken these tests)

The Doctor didn't ask me to take SEMEN analysis. I did it voluntarily in a Lab and found that SPERM count is NORMAL. 

But the other factors like motility and morphology are low. Just wondering if this would be a problem. :( Apart from that my erection and ejaculation is normal. 

Though i already have some recordings of her cruel activities and an eyewitness( A tenent in my home), I have a feel that if I file a case on ground of cruelty and non co-operation of s*xual side, They will surely turn the ball saying that I am an impotent. I may have to undergo one round of test and the SEMEN analysis will come into the picture. Please correct me if I am wrong.  If judge notes that I have less sperm motility and morphology, what will be the problem? 

 

Forming the questions as jist for your convinience:

1. Sperm motility and morphology counts are less. The valid sperm count is normal. Will this be problem during case?

2. Do I have to give her compensation? She is already earning 30K per month. Also, all members of her family are earning now and she is living with her parents and not alone. 

 

Thanks for all your helps pals

 

Thanks @Need justice and @piyush for your inputs


(Guest)

 hehe This one is exactly similar to my story.

@Bro, you dont need to wait for one year completion, file for judicial seperation on mental cruelty and wilful desertion. Since she is working, no problem with maintenance. But they may ask for one time settlement alimony after you file JS.

why waste time? proceed with your case, you have already built one.

Let them file as many cases as they want, you need not worry they are seen as counters. You dont pay her a single penny, its cruelty on you, you are the victim...pay your counsel and they will take care of the rest.

Regranter chap (SE)     23 April 2013

Thanks Bro,

I am going to have one last round of conversation with them. If that ain't going to work, i'll proceed furthur. 


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