Divorce

RCR is good option but you may get 498a in return.If you move for divorce then also you are not immune to 498a, its better to apply for anticipatory bail.Also don't worry mediation also happens after 498a

As per your query you want both things which ever comes earlier.

 

If she will join you then you could proceed with her.

 

If she doesnt join you then you need divorce.

 

In this condition when wife's nature is under suspense as what she will do, its advisable to file RCR.

Reasoning:

1. Is she joins you under the influence of rcr then also its ok to you.

2. If she doesnt join you then also its ok to you, as you will get decree after waiting one more year after sepration and rcr decree in favour of you.

 

Drawbacks:

If she turns for a single day and again ditches you then you have to start again with afresh filing of divorce  petition as all your allegations in rcr will be condoned after your oneday honeymoon alongwith her.

Logical strategy:

File for divorce right now stating her desertion without any reason. No cohabitation , no conjugal life and no chances of reunion.

For this you have to show evidences that desertion ha been crossed two years and you have tried many atimes but she is adamant to join. In this you wont have to pay any manitenance or alimony to her if desertion is prooved.

 

Start with legal notice, registered letters, mails and phone calls that you have tried a lot for reunion but she had made you life hell and alone.

 

Ps: 498a and dva cases are just icing on cake when you really need a freedom treat against your dead marriage.

Enjoy the ride without any shock absorbers. We indian males are borne to be tortured. So, dont get frusrated with these kind of hurdles when you need to reach at your destination.

Good luck.

ESIS

Filing RCR petition is of no use when she is not  willing to live with your anymore. Better take advise of a local prudent lawyer and then proceed as per his advise.

Thanks!! will be seeking help soon from a lawyer..

1. What do you want now? You want to file divorce suit or want to ways to get immuned to her anticipated complaint u/s498A?

Dear MR K K Ganguly, thanks for your kind repy... 

My recent talk with my wife i spoke about going in for mutual consent. which she refused point blank and told me that i wont come back and neither i would give divorce... I have enough evidence if need may like messages and some mails... and there are few other things which i have which i cant share here as dont want to malign anyone character.. but as i said i can definitely provide as evidence in the court..  

I did go to the police station and the women cell in my district and met the high officials there and as per them i need not have to worry even if the case of 498a is file against me and my family i will not be arrested with immediate effect and wait for the court to investigate in the matter.. which is relief for me.. 

I just need to understand that when she has made up her mind of not coming back and i go ahead and file in for divorce what should be my strategies?? as in how do i safe guard my self... and what can i expect from them??  we as a family have taken a conscious decision for divorce after the way she has behaved with us all and we are afraid that if she comes back she can probably create or make situation even worse... 

are there any ways we can make them go in for mutual consent?? how much is legal mediation dept helpful if we go for it?? can you further enlighten me??

 

1. My first advice is not to blindly depend on what the police people said. You will be shocked to find hat the same police people are chasing you to arrest you with the sole intension to extract huge money from you for not arresting you, should your wife lodges FIR against you u/s498A of IPC. such demand for money goes even upto Rs.5 lakhs depending on the size of your purse, 2. There are two ways left before you as under: a) File an application for restitution of conjugal right and after getting favourable order from the Court directing your wife to join you, wait for 1 year for her joining you. If she still refuses to join you, file a divorce suit. This is a sure way to get divorce in case she refuses to join you but is very time taking process. I do not recommend it. b) You manage to take a transfer to her place of employment and send her a legal notice to join you within 7 days. If she fails, file a divorce suit. 3. Please note that she has the right to work at a place different from where you are staying. You can not force her to resign and join you at your city. Court will not except such ground. That is why you should manage to take a transfer to her place of working and ask her to join you. In this case she will have no excuse to refuse to join you and if she still fails to join you, it will be easy for you to get the decree of divorce.

I agree with ESIS

if you file RCR, she can say her employment does not allow to join husband,

with so many adults involved in marital disputes, I sadly fail to understand why things have to go to court for solving. 
If girls dont want to continue the marital life, they can engage with spouse and others actively and have a conclusion to the whole story (legally or out of court) rather than dragging things and putting up false situation which is even worse.