Hi my name is Ankur. It's been 6 years since I have been married, we have 2 kids 5 years and 1.5 years both daughters. Actually recently I made my wife confess about her cheating by telling her the same lie about me, and there are more things she told me that she once met with her ex boyfriend too, she is a freelance makeup artist. After confessing all the things she promised me that she will not hide anything or lie to me from now on and I made a promise too despite I told everything lie about my cheat to know the truth from herself. After 2 days she went on a makeup out of station for 3 days and told me that there's a destination wedding for which she's been hired. After she reach there she told me that mobile data is not working there, due to the doubt I asked the hotel name and called directly on help desk. They told me that there is a hi speed WiFi installed and I also confirmed that no marriage is going on currently. After I asked her the same she kept telling me the lies on lies, after she came back she was too afraid by the questions. I asked her again and again, then she broke and told me that she went to do an private party event where she worked as a bartender and served drinks to few men in hotel room where they were playing coins and cards. My parents are old and belongs from village, she always told them that the event is like to manage people in marriage and functions like a hospitality work. I never told this to my parents that she part time do events because i didn't want to get her image down or get insulted in front of them but I always asked her not to do this even for part time but for more money she always did this event thing because she loves precious clothes, bags, and always wanted to live a luxurious life which I can't afford because my salary is just 40000 and she makes more money than me.
That day when she came back I was really angry because she lied to me again just to earn some more side money, I created a scene in front of my parents that she lied and went to do an event for 3 days. Right then I didn't told my parents about her cheating just to save her respect. There were many things coming in my mind which every husband would thing if she is with some men in a hotel for 3 days. I finally told my parents that the reality of events and all also due to anger I told them about her cheating too because I thought that after confessing to me and promising me she again lied and went to make that filthy money so she would do this again. Also, she always tortured me for my little mistakes since starting but never felt and guilt after cheated. Since last December I've been thinking continuously to make her confess because it was my gut feeling that there's something very wrong going on because everytime she used to hide her phone from me so in January only for testing her I asked her to start an open relationship where I asked her to meet a good looking man for fun also I asked her she can meet any person she want or like or love. On the next day she discussed this with her male and female friends, after discussing this she called me and reacted very angry on me that what kind on person I am and this and that. I felt relief too that she at least denied but on the other hand she started torturing me endlessly. I realised that this was my mistake I asked my wife this bad thing and I asked for apologies many times even I touched my head on her feet many times and I literally begged for apologies. After 7 months of torture I've been forgiven but she took this thing as her weapon. Now after 8 months I've been successful in taking her confession also she told me that a person was giving her money in between for free like one day she was talking over phone with this person and he just transferred 40000 rupees in her account without any reason (how's that possible?) I also doubt many more things she kept hiding from me. After this, on the day I created a drama she called her brother and left home with my younger kid also my parents tried to stop her. Now after she left, on the next day I told my parents each and everything in detail about her confessions and all but told her mother that I only told this cheating thing to my mother not to father so that she won't feel too bad after coming back as I want her to come back for my kids sake after all it's about their future. I asked her parents on call that she will need to confess all the things in front of them and at least my mother or at least in front of me but she now playing clever and telling me that like I was lying to know her she was also lying to know me and she is now stuck on that because I didn't get any chance to record anything at the time she confessed even by heavy heart at that time I truly forgiven her at the same time without torturing her like she did to me every time. Even I forgave her when she's been spotted by my friend in a night club with some of those event guys. Every time she had an explanation and I never been a forceful guy just because I loved her so much. But due to her lie again I opened this secret of her. It seems that her sister knew everything from starting that where she went for 3 days but never told me but just giving me a fake shoulder that don't think too much maybe yes there's a network issues and all, she (her younger sister) also do suck kind of events. She have a younger brother who also always been involved in betting and all and their father died before sometime and was not earning since long so maybe these things happened.
Now I'm so much disturbed because yesterday she went to my elder daughter's school and took her too from there in between without letting us know and now both of my daughters are there with her. She's continuously denying to admit everything and saying that I didn't do anything that's all and also blaming me and my character for asking the things I have asked her in January and which was also planned by me just for her confession. Also she is not ready to share her phone password with me as now if anyhow there's a chance of her come back. I have to know all things about her and I don't want to live in mystery anymore not more with her secret life. She keeps telling me that this is her privacy concern and will not come back on these conditions. She keeps blaming me back for my little things she preserved in her mind. Even I didn't hide anything from her not even my phone ever. Also she try to prove me a failure in my career and which is due to only because of her as she always made me live in mystery due to her secret life, hiding phones, messages and god knows many more and since 2-3 years I've been thinking about her every time.
Now please advice me what to do? Should I file a case? If yes then how would I prove anything in front of court? What I know only is the name of the person she cheated with and the hotel name in which she did this event thing. Is there any scope that I will get the custody of my kids or at least my elder daughter? My elder one will be turning 5 in January 2023 so till then should I stay quiet? What if she file a case by then because as I know I can get the custody only after her 5th birthday. I will go into depression without my kids, at least I can have one with me?
I will wait for your advice.
Ankur.
