Need advice

Your wife is a lecturer.  They have the habit of just teaching and they do not genuinely know to  listen.  They hear their own voice and nothing else.  I do not advise you to file RCR, divorce or child custody or if she files dowry harassment or some criminal case, fight them on merit.  That is not at all required.  What you require is a 'tact'.  That would never be taught in schools and colleges.  Some people have it by birth and some people like you, who are in the most need of it, have to learn it by hard way.  See, in Lord Krishna's life, he always faced the problem with his first wife Rukmini and second wife Satyabhama, due to the feuds between them.  But he managed them very well.  Just by playing tactic.  You find out a person little bit older than you, who knows worldwide earthy wisdom.  Learn techniques of tact from him.  Your parents are senior citizens and I have no doubt that her parents also might be senior citizens.  But you, your wife and your daughter have a lot of life left before you.  Do not create such a problem, which you, your wife and daughter have to face life long even parents of both of you depart this world.  Keep your parents happy when you are in front of them.  Accept everyone of their demand and do the responsibilities which as a son you should do to your old parents.  If they say that your wife is not worth to be a good daughter-in-law and not a good wife to you and not a good mother to your daughter, you say 'yes' and do not contradict them.  Same thing you do with your wife.  If she lectures that your parents are pain in the neck, dictators and do not respect her, say 'yes' and do not contradict her, if she says for a separate house, do not say 'NO", and spend time in search of very suitable house for your ethreal beautiful wife, where 24 hours water supply, uninterrupted power and cold breeze from Himalayas and sea breeze flow at the same time in your balcony.   Show her how much you are sweating to find a heavenly house for her.  Make everyone in your presence happy.   Do not forget to flatter your father-in-law and brother-in-law for their undivided attention towards your wife, which made your life less difficult.  Let one year or two years  pass and after that everyone of you will become so matured and all of them start to eat out of your hands and they cannot dream a life without you and for solution of simple problems they hover around you.  But not heeding my advice,  if you catch an advocate and file court case to teach your egoistic wife a lesson, even after five years you will be in inextricable turmoil.  Think twice before plunge into legal wrangle.

(LAST REPLY) 

Dear Querist

first of all, you have to decide to save the marriage or not////

if you are ready to live with her and save the marriage due to you daughter or whatever any other reason too, then try to resolve the issues with the help of relatives and friends, if not possible then try to go for Mutual Consent Divorce, if it is also not possible then you may file a contested divorce before family court based on cruelty u/s 13(1)(ia) of Hindu Marriage Act.

Feel Free to Call

Thanks for replies....

@ Adv. Chandrasekhar Sir : - Very true .... i am facing this from last 4 years but accepted everything.. I always take it positively that it will be fine in future..thats why i was seperatly leaving....still she dont want to adjust in life..no one is perfect..in husband wife relation there is fighting...but she is not able to handle the tensed situation.....me and my parents never made complaint that she is not behaving good to us..after 3 years of marriage my cousine come to know this and he talked with her parents but still they are blaming me and my parents....my parents already told me that stay seperatly but dont fight....they are not expecting anything from me.. they just want that me and my extended family should be happy...My one of the most weakness is my daughter.. she and her family knows that so after fighting she took bag and my daughter and went to her parents home..4 month before she did same thing..

I dont want to loose my dughter...but really get exhausted because of her behaviour...

Thats why i am not able to take decision that how to proceed.. First two years i took her back whenever she fight with me and went to parents house, last year my relatives did this..and now again the same..

@ Nadeem Sir :- Thanks for the information...