Dear friends,
just want to discuss if any other have faced similar situations and what they did
its a long write up below as i was not able to find good words to keep it short. apologies if that waste you time.
I am facing behavioral issues with my wife. I will with my parents and young brother. got married 4 months back in a complete social functional with both families consent - arrange marriage.
Being elder and having bad financial situations of my marriage, i was managing my family from last 8 years ... taking care of there financial needs. she understood and said she will be able to handle it with my support and she even showed compassion with my mom when she was ill before marriage
after marriage, things changed. she is very overwhelmed by the family culture, where everybody comes to me for there requirement. she thinks why people bother me everytime, why not my yonger brother who is just in job from last 1.5 yrs. Be it financially or other work.
for her my family depending on me looks like a burden to her. before marriage i told her that we will buy house within 2-3 years. now she is just pushing me everyday to buy house now and when i say i cant since need to save money...she simply starts tantrum...that why there is no money...why happened in past...give me account of last 8 years....when i tell her that how can i tell u all these day by day activity and if u have issues why didnt u clarified it before marriage. she said she was not able to understand that this much pressure and situation will be there...and she ignores that fact that she could have managed to these out before marriage if thats an issue with her...she continues to bad mouth about my family saying her situation is because of them. she do not take responsibility on her and is not etall tactful. i told her before marriage that she need to show paitence being the eldest bahuu...she cannot do that.
every night she fights with me till 1-2 pm..
she is doing her job and in the morning she does make me my food and when is back home in the evening she serves everybody. she also tries to be with family in sunday and make sure she makes good food and help.
but she has a grudge which she keeps in her mind and opens up with me only. this is detoriating her health. she has lost weight. My sister use to live for first 2 months then she got married. before marriage she said ihave problem with ur sister and u mom is just a simple lady ...now when she is not there...she has problem with my mom. before she has good regards for my younger brother. now she has problem saying he is lazy...irresponsible.
she has talked about divorce 3 times....though in anger...when she cools down she said she wont leave me....
things goes fine when i explain her...these problems does occur and with time u will be able to manage things...she becomes a lovely woman...but back of her mind she hold grudge...
A small miss i do in asking her something or missing to call her...or making her wait for sometime and she becomes furious.
she starts humping ...breathing heavily to the slightest of activity which is against her will and starts using profanity about me my mom...my sis...in front of them she is good...never did that...but with me she is totally out of control.
I cannot reason with her. she says she is adjusting..but she knows she is doing that because if she does not ...people will talk bad on her and her family...she is not doing things happily.
i am confused very confused...life has gone hell for me...i do not have words to put forth.
she is very good at one momemnt and suddenly she is furious
