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(Guest)

Need legal advice - thanks in advance

My brother got married 4 months back. Girl's mother, often threatens my brother saying she will take back her daughter to her house and uses filthy language for small issues. Girl doesnt want to live with my mom (our mom is widowed and sick, cant live alone. I am married and living out of country).

A month back, girl left his house with her mother, taking all her things. My brother was also upset and didnt stop her. Her mom called and asked why the marriage was not consummated and my brother replied that wife didn't stay continuously even for 1 month in the house and there were issues in-between because of her and her mom. Another issue they raised is her daughter will not stay with my mom and they want divorce.

Now received legal notice stating that

1. my brother left her at her house saying he will pick her up after 2 days. (which is a lie)
2. marriage is not consummated and he has to resume his duty as husband immediately. (they didnt talk to family members but said they want only divorce. their agenda is to threaten my brother for a separate family without my mom)

My question is

Should we reply to legal notice

1. denying 1st and for second saying that girl can come any time to her matrimonial home, but my mom will also stay with her son. Also her mom should not interfere or control/influence her daughter (which my brother says is a mental torture to him and thats his actual problem).

2. If they dont accept for this, can we ask whether they agree for mcd because my brother says it cannot go on like this. Again, for small issues, he fears girl might leave listening to her mom.

The lawyer he consulted advised that If he doesnt want to stay together, its better to file for divorce first from his side because girl now stays in different state and if she files there, we have go for hearing to other state. Also lawyer suggests that filing divorce will help against any criminal case if they file in future.

Please help. We thought it would be better to ask them for mutual divorce if they dont agree to his terms.



Learning

 12 Replies

Gautam Kapoor (IT professional Studying Law)     10 May 2014

If still possible, advised for marriage counselling.Nothing would have gone so horrendously wrong in 4 months.Settling in marriage takes time.Let your brother take the first step in this regard.

If the above does not work -work on the modalities to get MCD, engage elders to seek out a decent compromise.If possible record the whole situation asking closed questions.Depending upon the outcome you can take reciprocal actions.Filing a divorce now could be two edged sword at this stage.Even you file a divorce at your place she can easily get it transferred to her place to harass you further.

To let you know even MCD will take 2 yrs.

T. Kalaiselvan, Advocate (Advocate)     10 May 2014

It is too early to think about taking divorce from her.  If she has sent you a legal notice, you issue a reply notice denying all her allegations and indicating your willingness to accept her into the matrimonial house provided she walks in on her own as she had done while leaving the house.    Whether you file any matrimonial case or not, you cannot stop her from lodging criminal  complaints against you in case she decides to torture you and put pressure on you to take revenge on you and your people, so it is better you understand the situation and act wisely.

Laxmi Kant Joshi (Advocate )     10 May 2014

Don't make so hurry to file divorce , mcd etc . or to impose allegations on each other , think wisely sit together and try to solve the matter amicably with eachother by taking help of your elders or relative from both sides , you cannot file divorce or mcd before completion of one year of the marriage , utilize the time tell your brother visit to the doctor and done all his medical test and get his medically fit certificate that he is capable to perform his s*xual relationship , this will help you in future if they didn't compromise and asked for to make void this marriage in the court on the ground of non- consummate of the marriage due to impotence of your brother.

(Guest)

Thank all for your reply.


Can you please advice on the following:


1.  Is it advantageous to apply for void/annulment of marriage first from my brother's side instead of judicial separation (as suggested by our lawyer) because as the girl's side has been threatening the same for the last one month?

(Girls side doesnt want to talk to our family as their main aim to separate my brother.  They are strong in saying that girl cannot stay in the house with our mom but my brother has to resume his husband duties and they are using the non-consummation as the reason for threat)

Thanks.

Laxmi Kant Joshi (Advocate )     10 May 2014

As you stated that she don't want to reside with your mom , o.k. but pl. tell about the reason of non- consummation , don't conceal the facts ,don 't blame her , before they filed case for annulment of marriage in the court on the ground of non- consummation of marriage due to impotent of your brother , better prior solve the problem amicably with them and tell your brother to visit the concern doctor for his treatment . there is no use to file any case on her think wisely and act accordingly .

Gautam Kapoor (IT professional Studying Law)     10 May 2014

@Author - you dont have to answer any questions regarding non consummation of marriage .How can a sister answer questions regarding brothers non consummation of marriage- the opp party often takes the line of Non consummation of marriage,impotence which is/cannot be one sided...They also need to show the other prospective groom proof of her chas***y.One cannot rape to consummate a marriage if the other person is unwilling to consummate.

 

If they are adamant on breaking the marriage ask your brother to go for it.

Not advised to take any adventurist measures (going to the police station) at this stage ...it may amount to nailing your own coffin...They are clever enough to know which side is buttered and which side to take.As far as possible keep  police  out of this marimonial affair.

Last Reply


(Guest)

Thanks GK.  My brother told us that he was willing and also tried. He is also ready to produce medical certificate.  He is confused now whether to file the annulment case first (whether there is any advantage in the case) or reply to legal notice denying allegations and ready for talk/counselling and that time to see if they can come for mcd.


girl's family background
Her mother give no respect whatsoever and uses very filthy language and my brother hate to talk to her.  girl doesnt give any consideration for my brother's problem in this because girl is  controlled/badly influenced by her mother.  girls father's position is also same, her mom doesnt respect her husband, didnt even invite any family members for the marriage, stays most of the time at her sister's place in different city leaving her husband. So girl's dad is also helpless and they want the same thing to continue with my brother.  Even for small issues they cut down the relationship with the family members and we came to know  this after wedding.  now they want to separate my mom and whole family. 

 

 

 

drsxprt (self)     10 May 2014

@ author :
wht ur sil give reason ? tht after four months she realise ??? wht ? wht is she doing in this period ? four months is tooooo long period fr one to realise.
this applies to ur brother also.
by the way, the way u ask query and give reply, seems it is ur story.

2. marriage is not consummated and he has to resume his duty as husband immediately. (they didnt talk to family members but said they want only divorce. their agenda is to threaten my brother for a separate family without my mom).

fail to understand hw one can resume duty as husband/wife in an environment of divorce.


(Guest)

I have easy access to net and also have lot of free time to write in the forum and seek advice for my brother and our family peace.  I have watching and reading the advice in this forum for the last 1 month, since the girl left his house.  Initially the was problem because of lot of misunderstanding and influence of her mother and her mother humiliating my brother.  So they didnt raise this issue.  As soon as the girl left his house, they are raising this issue to threaten my brother with their demands.

2.  exactly - there was no positive environment before or after girl leaving, to resume his duty as husband. 

But they have sent the legal notice now.  So Iam worried whether to file for nullity or to send a reply notice denying the allegations and asking the girl to join.  We are also worried that the same kind of situation might come after girl comes back.

sr.netizen (freelance)     13 May 2014

"uses filthy language for small issues."

totally agree with u.
bt differ frm u, fr one it may b small bt fr others it may not b. so it is preferable one has to control own temper in every issue.
do u ?

in any issue one has no right to use filthy language. bt at the same time it is not to be considered the one who use filthy word is a bad and one who does not is a good.
m not advocating the community of person who use filthy language.

bt u must aware a diff. between murder 1] in heat of moment/rage and 2] with cold blood. and a short tempered person never b a good cold blooded murderer.

"her mom doesnt respect her husband, didnt even invite any family members for the marriage"

is it not tht knowingly or unknowingly u r interfering in their personal relation w/o knowing the real cause behind it ? instead of acting as a catalyst to solving their differences, with regret to say, u give a reason to justify ur act.

besides, one should understand tht off-spring of bad people are not always bad and of good people are not always good just bcoz of their parent.
ur sil is too under control of her parent.

"I have easy access to net and also have lot of free time to write in the forum." - may almighty god give sisters like u to all.

sr.netizen (freelance)     17 May 2014

women folks are more matured than men folk in social matters.

every spouse should treat other like own brother and sister. so if one of our sister/brother leave the house in rage of heat and when want to return and how one behave then or for that matter what type of step one take to call back.

my belief is that this type of behaviour/relation one should have with own spouse.

sooraj (none)     30 July 2014



Your query is very vague in furnishing needed information. I suscpect this is a very manipulated issue, probably messed up by the widowed mother who experienced strong emotions of jealousy after her son got married.

Your SIL left one month ago. They are married for 4 months. Why didn't your brother consumate the marriage ? You said he can produce Medical Certificate to prove that he can function as husband in the department of SEX. Then what/who is stopping him from doing the same. He is a husband, Your SIL needs SEX. He has a duty to provide that. Her mother is right in demanding to know why marriage is not consummated. The truth has to come out about his lack of willing-ness. Is it another girl ?

If you are worried about cases against you, you should get anticipatory bail. But interfering brothers marriage problems is not advisable. In many of your posting to others queries you have declared that a married woman has to cut ties off her family, accept husband's home as their own. So if you are following the same rule for yourself, then don't get involved in brothers troubles. You should practice what you preach.

Originally posted by : sister

Thanks GK.  My brother told us that he was willing and also tried. He is also ready to produce medical certificate.  He is confused now whether to file the annulment case first (whether there is any advantage in the case) or reply to legal notice denying allegations and ready for talk/counselling and that time to see if they can come for mcd.


girl's family background
Her mother give no respect whatsoever and uses very filthy language and my brother hate to talk to her.  girl doesnt give any consideration for my brother's problem in this because girl is  controlled/badly influenced by her mother.  girls father's position is also same, her mom doesnt respect her husband, didnt even invite any family members for the marriage, stays most of the time at her sister's place in different city leaving her husband. So girl's dad is also helpless and they want the same thing to continue with my brother.  Even for small issues they cut down the relationship with the family members and we came to know  this after wedding.  now they want to separate my mom and whole family. 

 

 

 


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