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Harrressed Husband (Freelancer)     12 June 2016

Wife attempted suicide, she is fine. help needed!

Stuck up in "failed marriage". I've been posting queries since 2 years and every time got great advise from respected members. One can see how my case progressed from my past queries. This can be good reference for troubled husbands as most of the issues or wife's behaviour are common. 

Recent query being Need help in false dv case On 1st May, wife created drama for no real reason (trust me she is expert in it, any normal person will not be able to do it), both parties called 100, filed complaints. On 13th May, got a call fro PS and I came to know wife filed a complaint that I put cuts on both her hands by sharp object (police just showed medical report and told what's about it). I could just see one remark "Assualt by husband" as they hardly give it for a second or two to see it. They just setteled the matter convincing both parties not to take further action. 

I asked for complaint copy and medical report in RTI. The medical report copy I got is not what was shown to me. This report is by psychiatric doctor stating wife lost her mental balance as we (father and me) had a fight with her using filthy language (again wrong, I have video of the trivial fight) and in mental disbalance she herself put the cuts by blade on her hand. On 3rd May she joined me in rented accomodation. We thought now she will not get any reason to fight but being expert she kept fighting with me for trivial issues. One day she said during fight she said why don't I divorce her and pay marriage expenses and alimony, etc. In all the fights my role is to keep mouth shut. I think this provokes her more. Next day when she was normal, I asked her for mutual divorce and give me exact amount she wants but she denied. 

Everytime I posted any query, it was already unbearable. All those times I wanted to go for divorce but those incidents were not "enough" for divorce so I could not proceed. But this time its extreme. Everybody's life has importance. I know my wife can stay happily at her parents home, so I want to go for divorce to safeguard her, her and my family from all this traumatic experiences and lastly myself. 

Dear respected, learned members looking at the situation please answer my questions -

1. What can happen to father and me in this sucide attempt complaint (FIR filed but no action taken till now)?

2. Can I use this as mental cruelty proof and file divorce?

3. I am already bankrupt by not being able to work because of all this. Somehow managing to pay EMIs, rent, expenses, etc. I've heard that after filing divorce one has to pay "maintenance" whether he is at fault or not. My wife is highly qualified and I am just a graduate but expert programmer. She is not working now. I earn by freelancing. Can I avoid maintenance or minimise it (I don't have a fixed earning or even a regular source)?

4. Our learned lawyer told that divorce notice can't be sent if wife is staying with husband. Is it true?

Experts please post as much answers/views in this matter. People like me will definitely get much needed help from it. 

Many Thanks!



Learning

 7 Replies

Vakalath (Vakeel No. 1)     13 June 2016

1.  Astrological question.  First file complaint in jurisdictoin police station about wife wanting to commit suicide.

2.  Yes, right away file it.  

3.  You can avoid maintenance, but idea can be given in consultation, not here.

4.  No.  Your lawyer is wrong.

 

Consultation by fees only.  No free seva.

lucky12321 (Job)     06 July 2016

What can happen to father and me in this sucide attempt complaint (FIR filed but no action taken till now)?

Draft a complaint from lawyer and lodge a complaint local police station.

2. Can I use this as mental cruelty proof and file divorce?

Yes but before that start collecting evidence as much as possible

3. I am already bankrupt by not being able to work because of all this. Somehow managing to pay EMIs, rent, expenses, etc. I've heard that after filing divorce one has to pay "maintenance" whether he is at fault or not. My wife is highly qualified and I am just a graduate but expert programmer. She is not working now. I earn by freelancing. Can I avoid maintenance or minimise it (I don't have a fixed earning or even a regular source)?

Yes you can avoid maintaince if she is more qualified start collecting her educational details certificate if she is working or worked prior to marriage then gather offer letter/salary slip etc. also try to gather IT return/form16 etc.

4. Our learned lawyer told that divorce notice can't be sent if wife is staying with husband. Is it true?

NO your lawyer is wrong.

 

Would suggest you before filling divorce please join SIF yahoo group and start attending weekly meeting at your place.

Harrressed Husband (Freelancer)     06 July 2016

Thank you very much dear friend. I read your posts, seems we both are in same boat. 2 days back I've moved ahead by sending divorce notice through lawyer and went out of city for some work so wife went to her parents home. In a day or two she will get notice, will inform you what happened next. Hoping a big drama and tough time ahead.
Some suffering guys I talked were strictly against initiating divorce procedure by a guy and that one can never get divorce with such a case. Additionally I'll have to pay her maintenance, so better let her initiate the process. But she would never do it so there was no meaning in waiting and wasting precious time moreover it was just getting dangerous and impossible to stay with her day by day. I was under constant fear what day will bring what event. In fact recently whenever wife quarreled she was also pushing me to file for divorce and saying that you have lots of recordings, proofs against me so better file for divorce BUT she will not give it and no judge can enforce her. What a contradiction! There must be some reason behind her saying all these as she is in touch with lawyer all the time. 

I was like now that I am paying rent and house expenses around Rs.12,000/- so better will pay her some and buy my peace of mind. I thought it was good deal :) 

 

lucky12321 (Job)     07 July 2016

Yes agreed most of the suffering guys against initiating divorce procedure by guy but what i feel if you have enough eveidence and you  make your mind then no use to waste your time may be  your wife also want the same but she don't want to initiate by own becuase of her family respect and society blah blah....now her family and your lovely can easily blame to you and your family and show her as a "ABLA NARI" "PATI SAY SATAYI HUI NARI"cheeky..

In meanwhile would suggest you start reading the law book and attending SIF meeting as well as try to collect evidence regarding her education/past exp. certificate/ITR etc.

Regards,

Lucky

lucky12321 (Job)     07 July 2016

One more thing pls keep all the call/video recording in original device and format never delete it.

Sudhir Kumar, Advocate (Advocate)     23 July 2016

why do not you continue in one thread

manindersingh   24 July 2016

Be brave

Fil complaint aainst wife & in laws for harrassing you and write letters o local police authorites ssp and explain that your wife and inlaws want t frame youin false caes/complaints.

That you have danger to your life from them, and proceed as above eplained by experts.

Best of luck. dont worry.


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