Hi, I’m 27 year old boy. I was in relationship with the girl (29 years old) 4 years ago. After a year into the relationship I realized that the girl is abusive, dominating, alcoholic and chronic smoker and violent as she comes from broken family. I come from conservative family therefore I wanted to withdraw from relationship.
On withdrawal and stating refusal to marry her girl slashed her wrists and consumed substance to attempt suicide. I felt succumbed to stay in relationship with her as I did not want to her to lose her life. The relationship suffered several breakups and patch ups during that we got physical intimate and the girl got pregnant. The girl refused to go to the doctor for abortion. Even after telling her to avoid, during pregnancy the girl continues indulging in smoking several packets of cigarettes and alcohol abuse showing no concern for the child inside her womb. We decided to give the baby for adoption and had found childless couple to adopt our baby.
The girl suddenly changes her mind to keep the baby after he is come out into the world.
Once again when stated that I do not wish to marry her she threatened to leave the baby (8 days old) and attempt suicide. I was helplessly compelled to give into her decision of not giving the baby away for adoption. We have been taking good care of the baby and he is 6 months old now. I have been with her all this while until recently when in a argument the girl scratched and violently bit me and kicked me out of her house and said she doesn’t want me in her life. After a month later, the girl now wants to marry for reason the baby is illegitimate (born out of wedlock) and wants the baby in her name. The baby’s birth certificate displays the mothers name with my surname. The girl is not interested in living with me.
Please help as I do not intent to marry her as she is not sound woman and threatens to suicide when she doesn’t have her way. I feel I have been submissive into the relationship under her suicidal attempts and don’t wish to spoil my future with her. Also, I do not wish to marry her out of the fear of the legal consequences I might have to face because that is not what marriage is about. I’ve tried to seek counseling help for her but her stubborn self refuses to comply.
I understand if she was to take matters to the court it is indeed going to be long affair given the complexities of the situations. Assuming she could be convinced for an amicable settlement or a peaceful Part away that could make life much easier.
Please help me understand the ways I could settle this as out of court?
I’ve listed some of options I could think of..Could you throw light on these..
Option 1
1) If I go against my will and marry her so that she doesn’t have to feel ashamed living in the society. Can we get married in the court with a Pre-Nuptial agreement where conditions are (neither party can claim the rights /Heir on each other’s Property when we Divorce at a later stage. The Divorce would be Mutually Agreed or so. I’m assuming this is a 6 month procedure for divorce.
Option 2
2) Can the Mothers Surname be amended on the Childs Birth certificate? (Birth certificate obtained from Mahanagarpalika) Perhaps if we file an Affidavit.
The mothers name on the birth certificate reflects as her first name and my Surname
Eg,
Mothers Name: Anita Binoy
Fathers name: Nivek Das
on birth certificate currently reflecting Mother name: Anita Nivek Das.
Can this be changed to reflect Mothers Name: Anita Binoy.
Please feel free to provide you inputs on how i could settle this out of court
Regards,
Nivek
