498a a wedding gift

@Radhika

Is the cause of your separation a dowry demand by your husband? or is it domestic violence? There is clear demarcation and I hope you understand that.

On Thursday, there was a program called "Saavdhan India" on some tv channel ( I think

Life)... they showed how a successful working woman files a false 498a against her husband and in-laws.

She accuses them of fraudulently aborting her child (by feeding her some stuff)...so he can marry

another girl for dowry.but the husband decides to fight the false case.Turns out she had a 'no pregnancy' contract

with her  employer and she secretly gets abortion done (not once but a few times). The girl (wife)'s mother

is aware of all the dirty tricks she is playing.

The husband wins the case and some compensation based on the wife's mother's (his MIL) testimony -

his MIL works as a school Principal so decides to stand the truth.

That episode was a pleasant surprise to me.

Hi Kiran.... but not all women are dirty......... there are some who are innocent and suffering...

Hi 498A wedding gift.... i can understand wht u r going throuhg... if u r innocent .... pls dont take me worng...

but wht if the husband approaches the courtfirst  and file RCR just to protect himselft..... ??? anyways not all are innocent and not all are culrptis....

Hi stalker,  ...  they wanted money only... and when i refused to fulfil their demands ..they started torturing me becasue my husband said in  front of the family members tht yes we tortured her so tht out of frustration and pain she will ask for Mutual divorce ... and if i divorce her so i hve to pay her. and now after 1 yrs he has filed an RCR so tht he can safeguard himself ..... and they say tht our son very qualifed and he deserve more.... we can get many more .who are ready to pay for an qualified boy....

moreover... my husband has no brain and wht he says is whtever my parents say i will do tht because parents are not worng, and whtever they do they do it for their child betterment.... if they will ask me to kill someone i can do tht also .....  so the person is not normal...

lol that was funny :)

@Radhika

How can a RCR safegaurd your husband's interests? RCR means join me...go and join him!! simple..

Whats the fuss all about? Initially he would have thought of MCD but now hez calling you back...RCR...go go go now before its too late...Your inferiority complex is driving you crazy. Your husband "can not" harm you in anyway. Dont think too much, go and join him. Everything will be allright.

This is the problem with house wives. They dont apply their mind and all the time insecured about their ownself. My wife did the same...I asked her to comeback but she didnt come. Thereafter she begged to take her back but I didnt accept. Chapter close mutual consent divorce filed!!

Hi  Need justice, if you r a lawyer... its not your fault becuse its ur profession... you cannot think emotionally... for lawyers they want to win the case no matter who is at fault... they dont see right and wrong... and Yes... i do agree with u tht he has no brain and he married to me.... i wish tht was not happened and  may be we both would ahve been leading a peaceful life... he has called for this disaster himselft by just lieteing to his parents...

@ Stalker, at least you tried calling your wife ..... in my case i sent him emails saying all the time "lets save the marriage"...but i did not get his response once...

 you right.... i did not use my brain...as  i kept quite for a yr and waited for him tht he will call me or will come to meet me once.. but he did not.. ,if he wanted to save the marriage he would NOT have approached the court first...and I did not leave him neither i left my matrimonial house, i was driven out of the house, so i had not option to come back to my parents house....if he wanted to save the marriage he would have approached the elders from his and from my family.... but they are at fault so they are not involving any family memebers.... and straight went to the court...

.... anyways..... regarding RCR... so this the reason the filed for an RCR to safeguard himself.

and i would sya not all women are bad or brainless...  neither i will say not all men are bad.... so being an educated man have some respect for others atlest

Hi Need Justice, 

point 1:  you r right. One has to be emotion less when u know you are surrounded by in-humans... be like them. then u can survive.

Point 2: I waited to save the relation, I waited because i have loved him... thinking tht one day my husband will realize, thinking tht my wife has done lot for the family ...though the relationship was spoiled... still wanted to give one more chance..and not taking tough or harsh decision... as i don't want to live with a guilt for not saving my marriage or giving time to my husband to decide (NOT to leave his parents/house but to make them understand tht I m his life partner not a maid or an ATM machine)...even i was being blamed for not bearing a child.. and my husband is highly diabetic before marriage and asthmatic as well. He told me on our honeymoon and asked me not to disclose to my parents..anyways... I still waited for him.. now i m not and have no regrets tht i did anything to save my marriage/realation. And I believe in god... Now, they will taste their own medicine which they have given to me and my entire family. God will punish them for sure.. 

Point 3: Yes, 2 uncles ( in-law mama and chacha) visited the house including the neighbor, i was there at my matri .house. They both asked them(in-lws) and to me where is the disconnect, i told them everything... and they also said lot of things...however, including them, the neighbors were also in my favor, becuse they have observed me and my behavior, tht in all possible wys i hve tried to keep them happy as a DIL... But in return uncles were been insulted by my FIL...  and asked not to interfere in the matter... she is our DIL so whtever or which ever way we will keep her ... who are u tell us... and since then no body wants to involve in the matter. but my extened in-lws family are in touch with me and my pa and ma..  they are very supportive... 

Point 4: Yes, in their house they use abusive language ... my husband has a dual personality .. at time he use to behave like a great great great husband  and after some time in front of his parents he will became devil (abusive and wild).. I agree they do not respect n love each other... wht they want is just money and want to show off the world tht  they are very very rich, which they are not...

Point 5: I agreed "it takes two hands to clap"... i will not say tht i did not do anything. Yes, for the first one yr i tolerated.. just to keep peace in the family and did not complain.. but i use to make my husband understand it hurts me when u all misbehave with me ...  whtever i earn or wht ever my parents use to give me. they want tht...Yes, I protested , i raised my voice when water started coming upto my nose level and my husband crossed all all all his limits .. i was push beyond my tolerance level... (many incidences... tht it will not go from my mind till my last breath..)

Point 6 : anyways ... yes he is not interested because he wants to marry again, his rates already been fixed... and if he doesn't follow his parents order he will be disowned from the property...  

Point 7: :), hoping god must have planed something good for me in the future... 

Point8: :) problem with in-lws, i have been raised in a family where we give respect to each other and knows the importance of parents and other family members , one of my brothers...is happily married n we all are staying together.... and I always wanted to marry a man who has a family, elders can inculcate good values in us ... but my in-lws they believe in "divide n rule"

Point 9:  no more crying... see I can lie to the world but i cannot lie to myself and and i know tht whole heartily I performed my duties as a responsible wife and DIL and its my husband's fate tht he has lost me forever... i would say to god.. rather then staying with him now and dying every day...i would love to die at once...

No matter whtever has happened with me.... i still believe tht there are some good people on earth... and not every one is bad... 

Hi Samy 

The first primary role in the family of the man is to show loving leadership over wife and children. Oversight of all matters in the home, both physical and spiritual.  The wife is the manager of the home, but the husband is the manager of the wife.

The second primary role in the family of the man is to be the "breadwinner" Works to make money to support family.

Dont know wht made u think tht Wives treat their husbands as an ATM.... but i think tht  now a days... both are responsible to run a family both means ..both.. if the husband's income is not sufficient.... as u need basis facilities or comforts to run a family ..

Someone forgot something, very basic..

It takes two to tango !!!

Yes helping hand .... i totaly agree with you ..........

"Marriage doesnt demand much but a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness.... a dress that zips up the back were a husband and wife can be together."   ....  :)

" It is not a lack of love, but a lack of respect, trust, lack of friendship, lack of understanding, that makes unhappy marriages.

RADHIKA and others. Argue as much as you want BUT:

• Dowry giving and taking is an offense

• Should be doucmented

• It is very obvious that just like women MEN are also being abused

• All Laws should be gender neutral

• If woman feels she is being abuse, she should have enough confidence to leave and live on her own. 498A and other sections are not going to change that

• In several states like AP for ex women have even an advantage over men with 33% reservation in Engineering and are able to get better opportunities than men. and I think TA jobs mentioned that 60% of all blue and "lower" - no offense have women

• If Man feels abused he must be able to approach court just like a woman for justice. With DV and 498A no possibility

• Property laws should be respected. No woman should be able to claim residence on husbands property as long as its self acquired.

• I tend to like the western point of view that all assets acquired during marriage is to be divided equally between the two with some discretion to court in case of DV and abuse. This clearly and justly does not put a 10 year old marriage on same footing as a 3 month old.

• Children should be burden to both post divorce as well. Alimony for child is acceptable since he is an outomce of the "partnership" as long as it lasted

So Back off. Hear your case. But there are thousands of men suffering equally too.

Hi Ragz....   .. we are not arguing .... its just everybody's point of view...

and i have mentioned in my earlier post tht ... not every Men or Women are wrong.....  and wht u ahve mentioned I do agree with you 200%... however... becuase of false cases the innocent men are suffering even the women who being tortured are also suffering because those women are not getting the true justice.. or

Yes, i say tht if u being tortured by anyone specifically the so called life Partner... the one should be alert and should have proofs to support the case... 

rest is all fate and luck... its a Gamble... some wins some losses ... wish we can have a WIN WIN Situation...

Win win situation is possible only when justice is served within 6months period after the complaint is lodged. Even the divorce laws should change drastically. For misuse of these laws, compesation and order of punishment shld be high.