Nikki Popat (I.T) 05 December 2013
Laxmi Kant Joshi (Advocate ) 05 December 2013
Adv. Chandrasekhar (Advocate) 05 December 2013
1. She needs psychological treatment and should be consulted.
2. If she can be recoverable from mental problem, he should help her in recovery. Otherwise, he can file divorce petiton on the ground of cruelty.
3. Even against her consent, if the daughter wants, he should send her boarding school, so that the daughter can concentrate her studies and occasionally visit her ailing mother and her father.
Hardeep (Business) 05 December 2013
Agree with Mr. Joshi. Mental instability is a disease and once established can ease up/ become considerably controllable with proper treatment. Such people have to be handled with care and concern, just like you would another sick person. Considering your uncle has lived with her for 12 odd years now and there is a daughter too such concern seems to be a better way out presently.
Re Mental Disorder as a ground for Divorce it has to be incurable and at such a kind that the couple can not be expected to live together. So anyways, such status and its incurability will have to be established first.
Nikki Popat (I.T) 05 December 2013
Recently. my uncle's friends' wife tried to talk to her regarding her behaviour as she is getting our of control, but she replied saying that she will continue acting this way, therefore she is perfectly aware of her actions. She knows that my uncle has a heart condition, insulin dependant diabetes and high blood pressure, all of which are worse with stress and could cause him to have a heart attack or stroke, but she is not at all sympathetic about this.
My uncle recently also spoke to his wife's aunt who has known her since she was young and she told my uncle she has always been like this. My uncle also doesn't know the real reason that she got divorced from her first husband, as her parents told him that they were not giving her food and mistreating her.
I will definitely tell my uncle to take her to be assessed by a doctor. She often goes for a physical check up, but she definitely needs to be mentally assessed. At least after that we'll know for sure. I don't think it will be easy as I know she will refuse to go and also she knows how to 'act sweetly' in front of some people that unless they know her personally and see her in one of her outbursts, you'd think she was perfectly normal.
Once the wife locked my grandmother in the toilet, when my mother asked the daughter quietly who locked her in, she said ''My dad did it.'' Her dad was at work and wasn't even home.
Another thing is that when she goes into her rage, she starts shouting ''He's beating me, he's throwing me out of the house'', when in fact my uncle is nowhere near her. I've witnessed this first hand. She often threatens to call the police. He usually leaves the house as this is the best thing to do otherwise she doesn't calm down. I'm afraid that she might make false allegations against my uncle as she has often said to him ''I will put you in jail.'' As she has taught her daughter to tell lies, she could use her as a witness.
T. Kalaiselvan, Advocate (Advocate) 05 December 2013
This female needs a medical attendance especially regarding mental health, but it will take a very long time to cure this depression, and such depressions cannot be guaranteed to become alright even after continuous treatment because firstly such characters will not cooperate with the medical attendant or with the treatment and instead they may feel insulted for being treated as a mentally affected person. For the purpose of divorce,you may obtain a certificate about your mental health and as advised by some gentlemen above, if the daughter is not willing to live with you, she may be accommodated in any boarding school by producing the medical certificate of her mother.
Nikki Popat (I.T) 06 December 2013
This lady is definitely the kind of person who will not cooperate. She overreacts about trivial matters, I can imagine she will create a scene at the mere suggestion of a mental check up and will end up resenting my uncle even more.
T. Kalaiselvan, Advocate (Advocate) 07 December 2013
If she will not cooperate for the medical checkup also, then the only alternative is to file a divorce case on mental cruelty only. In that the pleadings should include the real fact namely she overacts/reacts to even simple issues or no issues and all her psycho activities. In the pleadings it should also be mentioned that if need be she should be referred to a psychiatrist, but the grounds should be on cruelty, in the mean time collect all evidences against her
gautam (not disclosed) 09 December 2013
am surprised nobody advised to take video/audio recordings of outbursts, it could prove very very useful in contested divorce case to prove mental cruelty, and a strong case to be referred to the psychiatrist.
K.K.Ganguly (Advocate) 09 December 2013
1. From what has been described at leanth by you about your aunty, it appears that she needs immediate medical attention,
2. If she does not co-operate to go to the Doctor, there are ways by which psychiatrists manage to check their wild patients, Contact a Psychiatrists
immediately.
3. Arrange for medical treatment first. A normal person can not behave the way she is behaving as per your statement,
4. If all steps taken by your Uncle to change her her fails, he can file a divorce suit on the ground of cruelty after collecting evidence like audio recordings etc.,
5. The Court will decide on the amount of alimony or even the amount of maintenance to be paid to her which is generally 1/3rd of his monthly earling.
Nikki Popat (I.T) 10 December 2013
Sirs, I will definitely tell my uncle to start collecting solid evidence as you suggested.
My uncle and mother are brother/sister and but we live abroad and come to India once a year due to work commitments which is why it is difficult for us to help and there is no one else willing to get involved. We are due to come to India in the next few months, so I will tell my uncle to start her medical check-up before we come.
Last year when we came, the maid came to see my mother and started crying saying that my aunt is torturing my grandmother so much and she feels so sorry for her and pleaded with my mother to take my grandmother with her. My grandmother is bedridden and can't even travel a short distance, how could we bring her back with us? Because of this worry of my grandmother, by mother is also stressed and has high blood pressure because she is feeling helpless.
Due to my aunt's behaviour, my uncle has become a very nervous person and has told my mother that he doesn't want to live anymore. He has in the past talked of suicide, which is why we are concerned for him.
As I mentioned, his diabetes has got out of control due to this stress that it has started affecting his legs. Two years ago, he was hospitalised for this and was not working for 6 months. He had to have physiotherapy to be able to walk again. Even in this state, my aunt was torturing him and he would start to cry as he could not walk away from her as he normally does. His legs still become numb and he is walking with a slight limp now. He wants to retire early due to this but is not doing so because of my aunt.
Sir you mentioned that he would have to pay her generally 1/3 of his earning, but what if he were to stop working?
Many thanks
gautam (not disclosed) 11 December 2013
check if he can prove medical reasons to opt for early retirement.
in that event, his income will be nil and maintenance will be calculated on the basis of his assets
K.K.Ganguly (Advocate) 11 December 2013
The latest view of the Apex Court is 'You beg or borrow, you shall have to maintain your family'.