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prvns   31 March 2017

advise required

Hi all .I required yr valuable advice on the way my family life has turned over.our marriage being love marriage btwn relatives she frm Chennai n me in Bangalore.got married in Jan 2015..my mom n ma elder aunt stay wit me .both being senior citizens. my wife got pregnant within few weeks of marriage.she has wheezing so to avoid medicine n affect I sent her to in laws fr the first 3months . Later she returned n as usual like all houses there was diff in opinion btw ma parents n her wrt all matters.few matter's I used to intervene n solve internally but others were just mere misunderstanding. One fine day she der was an argument in night n she wanted to leave immediately..i somehow convinced her..but d next morning she left me without informing to her parents hm.i went n spoke to her even let her stay there few months to get peace of mind as she is pregnant.but argument used to continue always complaining abt my family ..told my relatives tat my parents tortured her ..all this was in 13days stay at my home.baby boy got delivered. Now she is saying Bangalore climate is not suiting her ..n I have to shift wit family der if I want her n kid.also tat she doesn't believe me n my parents so doesn't want to return here.i tried to convince here tat as my job is in Bangalore ..I will try to cm but at least stay wit me till I get ..she refused after all d arguments.she is telling me she doesn't want me ..let's take divorce..n her dad will handle the matter's now on. Even wen my child's name was being kept ..my bus was delayed ..dey didn't even care to call n ask whether I'm coming or not they just went on with the ceremony n my calls were unattended.latrr they blamed me for not attending. How can I trust such people. Pls advice me because how to safe guard my parents n myself.i am confused how to go about this.


Learning

 12 Replies

prvns   31 March 2017

Sorry topographical error .marriage happened on Jan 2016

prvns   31 March 2017

Sorry topographical error .marriage happened on Jan 2016

(Guest)

You say you got married Jan 2016 and within few weeks she got pregnant.  Can you 100% be sure that baby is born to you?  Did you do DNA testing?  Why am saying this is because, all of a sudden her behaviour changes, and you dont seem to know the reason why.  And you call it love marriage also.  Was she in love with someone else ?  I sincerly doubt valid child.  You can do DNA test.  

 

Few months later your wife will come up with one thread on any of the legal forums, can I change name of biological father and use my dads name instead ie my maiden name?

 

See, I am not trying to spoil your mind here.  These kind of cases and situations I see in court daily and on online forums on daily basis.  All such evidence you will need to collect in order to secure yourself a divorce, in case your wife does not agree for MCD under 13B of Hindu Marriage Act.

Sooner or later these will be the very points on which you will file divorce.  Valid points or invalid, but advocates usually use mirch masala and file petition with all sorts of concoted stories is another undeniable truth I see everyday in courts.

 

Anyhow if you guys have agreed then go ahead with mutual divorce.  

 

But what about child?  if child is not yours your property etc cant be given to it when it turns 18.  If child is yours it takes all share in property.  So dont keep anything in your name ever.

No safegaurding against anything when it comes to blows from Indian wife/women.

Very sensitive issue. Please tread carefully.  Talk to wife, see how it looks, if things appear to get fine, then continue with marriage.  Dont spoil it.  At no point directly make a allegation and get into a fix or altercation with either wife or the in-laws.

 

You may keep in touch with me.

1 Like

prvns   31 March 2017

It's my self acquired property not ancestral does wife & son still have all the rights on it. Pls advice

(Guest)

@helping Hand are you a lawyer or agony aunt. Keep your opinion to the facts and dont pollute the minds of the querists. Kindly keep in mind this is a legal forum


(Guest)
Originally posted by : Adv Rit Arora
@helping Hand are you a lawyer or agony aunt. Keep your opinion to the facts and dont pollute the minds of the querists. Kindly keep in mind this is a legal forum

What more optiions are available for warring couple than take divorce and move on?  I dont think you have read my reply properly.  Anyway, its not just duty of a Lawyer to simply suggest legal method to get over the problem or get into a newer problem but try to solve the problem or give solution.  You have not done either of it.  What makes you simply comment on my reply?  Try to help the querist rather than simply post a reply for the sake of posting would be my advise to you.

stanley (Freedom)     31 March 2017

@ author 

1. If she is suggesting to go in for divorce than better to go in for Divorce by  mutual consent , if it seems that marriage is not going to work out .Get married once again and lead a better life .

2.and if you want visitation rights for the child be carefull that these points are added in the mutual consent instead of crying later on for the same .  

3. Try and find out if she has any extra martial relationship as she seems very desperate to go in for Divorce . 

4. She may be Dad and Moms pet hence she is behaving like this . But she should releaise that mom and Dad will die one day and she has to live her life with the kid . Than finally kid will get married and than she will be all alone and may have to go to an old age home cooldevil

A walk alone (-)     31 March 2017

1) first try to reconcile for better future of child. 2) if it fails and she agree for MCD then accept this golden opportunity ,go MCD before she change her mind. 3) if she dnt agree for MCD and not want to come then call her and between talk try that she would herself accept that your family never ask dowry and tortured her. Make a recording of this call. It will help you in future. After that recording give her a legal notice through lawyer to come back. 4) record all your calls in future.5) don't dance on her tune, have some self respect.

Born Fighter (xxx)     31 March 2017

Give ur wife an option to stay with you at a neutral place, away from your inlaws and ur parents/relatives. Thats only way you can save ur marriage, if u want to.

If she is still adamanant start gathering evidences and plan accordingly.

rajuchowdappa   01 April 2017

Hi, I am practicing advocate in Bangalore and you can consult me to this number 9980635871.

Kumar Doab (FIN)     05 April 2017

First: Try to save the marriage.

It might be possible to address and remove the misunderstandings and differences.

Kumar Doab (FIN)     05 April 2017

MCD can be quick and easy. You need to settle the terms.

Wife has NO forced share in self acquired estate of husband.

Wife is not Co-parcener in ancestral property.

The estate and earning capacity can be deciding factor for maitainance/alimony.


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