Background : Ours is a Hindu-Brahmin family from a village in
1969 : My father got married. My “nanaji” gave lot of goods, furnitures, ornaments and “asharfee” (golden coins) etc. to my mother in “bidai” while sending my mother to her in-laws as per the social obligations and expectations.
1971 : My fathers younger sister got married. As per the expectations of the groom’s family we had to provide enough “consideration” while sending her off to her in-laws. All the goods, furnitures, ornaments of my mother were transferred to meet the expectations with my grandfather promising to compensate with land etc. as appropriate.
1973 : I was born in village. My mother had to struggle for my upbringing and didn’t had any means to support as my father used to send money to my Uncle and grandfather under the impression that everything is taken care of. There were loans , mortgages which he needed to foreclose as a result of the unreasonable family spend and the marriages of my “bua”. My mom didn’t speak of anything in the interest of the family and she was made to keep quiet.
1974 : A fresh demand was made by the grooms family and my Uncle sent the “asharfee” (golden coins) to my “bua” and my grandfather promising yet again a piece of land. My mother had to let it go in the interest of the family. She was left with only an almirah by now. My father had to give up his wedding watch too.
Late 1970 : My Uncle got married. My father got my Uncle employed in his own firm.
During this period my father bought a land where he contributed almost Rs. 25,000 and my Uncle contributed Rs.2,500. The land was bought in the name of grandfather as a respect.
Early 1980 : My father started constructing a new house ( 2room, small house) as per his capacity as the ancestral house was getting old. All cost of construction was born by my Father. Our family were living away from village by now and I had started my schooling, with my father started working for a reputed company and the life were moving on a right track.
1981: My brother was born.
1982 : My father asked my Uncle to send his small son to him for getting him educated which remained a nuisance for us and finally we had to send him back after a year of trial. My Uncles’ family said something was fishy and all sorts of abuses and misunderstandings started. We never recovered our courage to propose anything else with such an outburst. By this time I started doing well in my studies with good results and being in top 3 in the classes I studied.
In the meanwhile my Uncles’ family shifted in the new house made by my father without even having a courtesy of informing us and even without performing the “griha pravesh pooja”.
1990 – 2000 : I kept on concentrating on my studies and completed my higher studies and started job in late 90’s.
2000 : My father was getting retired in another 18 months and shared the thought to build basic amenities like water/toilet etc. in the constructed house.
2000-2002 : The repeated thoughts were never acknowledged properly and my Uncle didn’t allow to build anything. Finally my father had to buy a flat in
All along the discussion went on an the delaying tactics of my Uncle went on.
2002 : My Uncles daughter got married and he sold off a ancestral land to meet the marriage expenses without even asking for our thoughts, ideas and decision on it. However, he promised to provide an equivalent land from his share of the ancestral property.
2003 : I was to be married in the village and for that the basic infrastructure needed to be created. Uncle refused to pay heed to it and said “Nothing Doing” he was not ready to contribute anything. Anyways I got married to our utter inconvenience and embarrassment and hardly spent a day post my marriage in the house.
2005 : My son was born.
2006 : My grandfather died at the age of 107 years. He had a very horrible time in the hands of my Uncles family. The treatment of my Uncles’ family to him was shocking and he used to hurl abuses, physically dump and thrash him. God showered mercy and called him in his custody. I was very close to him and still regret to his sufferings now.
2007 ; I wanted to get the “mundan” of my son and due to such stand, had to get it done at
2007 – 2010 : all these years we have trying to persuade my Uncle and his son to talk ona honourable separation which has been falling in deaf ears.
We feel its an intent of theirs to consistently keeping us through the inconveniences of life so that we give up and leave all property. My father is elder to him but he has been abusing him like anything now and my father being soft spoken had to give him a befitting reply;
2010 ; I started forcing my presence now and putting up the discussion directly with my Uncle. He reverted saying I am not qualified to do so as long as my father is alive. I did keep my calm and honoured his existence which I will continue to do so.
In mid of the year we caught hold of Uncle and gave him options to choose from to have a honourable separation as we wanted to build a house of our own and plan life forward. He bought time on the pretext of discussing with his son etc. even I have been discussing this with his son to avoid any inconveneinces and in the interest of the family at large.
My Uncle committed to one of the option and and we went ahead . We planned the “griha aarambh” pooja but exactly 12 housr before the ceremony he again threw tantrum that how can you do this till the land has been separated and shared. We went ahead and did that and had a strong argument.
Yet again we have been discussing whats the issue, why they change in stance etc. ….without any change in their stand.
We feel it’s a clear intent of their to keep us from the rights of the ancestral property without acknowledging the past obligations to us so that he has an easy and comfortable right to the whole property.
We would like to seek your advise to the below:
-
Can my mother claim the equivalent ancestral property in exchange of the “asharfee” and other utensils/goods etc. given as “consideration” to my “bua” (fathers sister) taken by grandfather. (The witness to the incident being my “Bua” who is the beneficiary)
-
Can my father claim from my Uncle, the land in exchange of the land he sold for the marriage of his daughter and as per his promise was supposed to be given to us.
-
Can my father claim the right to the land (complete/part thereof as per the contribution made) purchased by him but in the name of grandfather. It’s the same land where we had performed “griha aarambh” and would like to build our new house?
-
Can we force a notice to the parties holding share in the land on our intent to take our share from it?
Your advise would be appreciated to get out of this mess.
