Can Incompatability be cause for Divorce

Dear,

I am facing same problem, My wife filed 498A against me, Be safe and collect evidence for you and your fsmily safety. These king of girls are greedy and do not have wish to be a family wife.

I am of the view that if there is incompatibility between husband and wife it is very difficult to continued with the marriage. But dont rush into anything, and first discusss the matter with your wife and go for Family Counselling. I have seen some marriage where there was absolute incompatibility but some how they dragged on and after years and years of struggling they are now living happily. In most of the marriage especially early marriage of the parties it is not a home but a battle field of the two titans: but as time goes by they get to know each other better and end up in happy family. Ofcourse thisis not the rule in every incompitable couples.But incompatibility is the worst disese in any marriage, but have patient and go for family counselling with your wife and hope she will realized her marital responsibilities in the near future, and if that failed take steps for other course available under the law.

Two things, we must understand.  In Hindu Marriage Act and Special Marriage Act, the grounds for seeking divorce have been well laid down.   In that incompatiability is not a ground.  similarly, getting annoyed with husband's sister or neglecting the husband's brother are not grounds.  Similarly, feel proud and give importance to professional career is not a gound for divorce.  Even having no cardial relationship (even though this ground has not been mentioned but in several querries this point raises), with the in-laws is not a ground.  Even then, all these activities of the wife, in the perception of the husband, amount to "cruelty", but in law that is not cruelty.

Incompatiability and irretrvable break down of marriage are not grounds.  Indian boy suffers from two vices - He feels that if he is showering love towards his wife it amounts to disrespect and non-affection towards his parents and especially mother.  He feels so much guilty.  It is not so.  Similarly, he expects, that after marriage, the total influence of his inlaws and their family on his wife should be vanished by a magic wand and she should surrender herself totally and demands that  she shall not even recollect her sweet memories with her parents and brothers and sisters.

When husband tries to understand the 21st century woman, he will be happy.  If he tries to live in 21st century and expect his wife of 18th century, these problems will crop up.

Arun sir, I can understand from your query that there is no understadning between your wife, yourself and your family members. But  these are not grounds for divorce under present laws. As Learned members have advised, you try having family counselling.

Thanks Prabhakar and Suchitra for your comments here..I truly appreciate these facts.

Marriage is a long term relationship whose foundation is laid on love ,trust ,caring and being understanding. I also know for the fact that all human being are not the same, infact I wanted to have the normal married life where girl should be able to understand if there is no balance in the work life relationship , that relationship will have lot of hurdles and few qualities of person like not paying attention to ur parents even when they are not well(which shows person is not caring), do not feel good about the children,not taking care of urself aggrevates this.

I know the facts mentioned here cannot be ground of divorce but these are facts which are killing me and I dont forsee that this nature of the person cannot be changed.