With reference to article "Parental intrusion ruining couples' marital life:Delhi high court" and judgement given by Justice Kailash Gambhir, below is my situation, please suggest.
BACKGROUND
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I got married on 28 Feb 2008. It was an arrange marriege where girls family is very spiritual and perform hour long puja twice daily and follow sant asaram bapu, palam wale baba, shahdara wale baba, karawal nagar wale guru ji and haridwar wale pandit ji (this we didn't know earlier). My parents selected the girl as she was also very spiritual, and I also agreed on the marriage. She is the alone girl with 2 brothers, 1 elder (29 married working) and 1 younger (23 bachelor studying).
She carried her mobile phone to my home and were constantly in touch with her parents and she used to run into corners for talking to her parents, not even in front of me she could talk with her parents, not even till now she talks with her parents in front of me. She is very angry girl. Do whatever she likes. Do not listen to anybody except her parents.
She started suffering some mirgi type of attacks sometimes and used to talk in different tones and tongues then her father took us to a babaji and he suggested that she is haunted by ghosts which were sent by my eldor brother's wife and her mother. We just wanted to get rid of the problem my wife was going through, so we decided to follow whatever babaji tells, we went to Balaji temple and perform many pujas also in house to get rid of the problem.
She stayed more than 1 year at my home (in this period we used to go to her home and both families had good relations) and then her father called her 1 day to their home and refused to send her back and started telling false stories in the relatives like they beat my girl and they have made my girl a domestic servant and my brother's wife has her attacked by ghosts and many other things, this was not expected from either the girl or her parents, so I called her up and asked her to come back. But she didn't come back, and later on after 5 months her father told that he will only send her girl back if we both live separate from my family (ours is a joint family, father-mother, brother and his wife and their children) and not with my brother and his wife. My father and me accepted this and I rented out a flat 10 minutes walking distance from my father's house. Since then we are living seperately and few times we both quarrel also and nicely living together.
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CURRENT SITUATION
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Now she has no ghost attacks at all. Her parents call her atleast 10-15 times daily and they always try to twist her mind against me and my family. Mostly topic of their conversation is me and my family. Her mom-dad always spoon feed her in negative way against me and my family. There are many instances I know when she calls her mother and father for even very small decisions of our day to day life. During this period she 2-3 times threatened me that "she would do SOMETHING and will trap me and few of my family members" on daily trivial issues. Once she tried to cut her wrist then I snatched the knife from her hand. I called my neighbors and told them about this but she denied in front of them about this thing and said I was beating her. Then in the evening I made recording of our talks about the incident, then also she was doubting about my intentions and started looking in my phone instead of replying to my questions. Then in the last she said that I don't know from where that thought came into my mind. I let go of everything and only tried to give her positive thoughts and not even told anything to my parents. I don't tell them anything between us but she always tells everything to her parents about us and our day to day life and events, and her parents are always interested to investigate about everything going on in my house and my parent's house. And now she even don't want my parents to come to my house as they come occasionaly for few minutes or hours.
Now I have got a very good job in Bangalore, we decided once I rented out a flat in Bangalore she will fly here alone or with her younger brother (I will book the tickets). I came to Bangalore on 19 Mar 11, and she went to her parents place after 1 week. And now she refuses to come back and always try to fight with me on old topics some or the other, initially she used to say I will come there in flight alone, now she say I will only come if you are coming to take me. I have rented out a flat here + rent of Delhi flat + I am living in PG cause nothing is there in the newly rented flat. Her father also started saying you come to take her and I have to do a discussion with you then only I will send her. She even says if you don't come to take me, I am happy living here with my parents (She does not even care for her own home locked down for her to return). She starts shouting if I say something against her or her parents and is always ready to finish this relationship.
The girl is not at all mentally attached to me. And always finding a way to fight with me on phone. I still call her and listen everything she says and tries to calm her down and her mother always sitting behind with her murmuring something in background. Her father says, I will let you know the date once I discuss this with my wife and my wife has gone somewhere. They don't call me or my parents. She occasionaly calls my mother when I persuad her to do so many times.
Now I don't understand and make up my mind what to do in this situation. I know this girl will never live happily with me untill her parents stop calling and filling her mind with negative thoughts. I am trying to keep this wedding but I don't know what else to do. I can't concentrate on my work, my appetite has gone, always BP low. Sometimes I think of suiside also, but I know that will not do anything positive. Please suggest, what step I should take so that I can live happy, she can live happy and my parents can live happy.
Please let me know if any other information is needed.
