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gautam (engg)     29 June 2011

Compromise

Hello All,

I have filled divorce on the ground of cruelty on my wife, her parent with local gunddas has beaten me after that they had given a false compliant in police station against me & my Mother for domestic violence. Case has not been filed in court.

After filing divorce by me 3 dates are passed, but she was not present for a single date.

Now she wants to come back. She is feeling sorry for whatever she has done

Please tell me what i have to do, how I can trust her.

Suppose I forgive her and in future she might give false compliant in police station under 498a or DV against me and my family members. So to be in safety side what i have to do

Please Help,

Thanks in advance



Learning

 10 Replies

Gundlapallis (Advocate)     29 June 2011

Its so unfortunate and pathetic the life has become for innocent husbands due to misuse of laws.  Your own words "suppose i forgive her...." is revealing your mood.  You take a letter from her requesting you to forgive her, written in presence of elders of both of your families and make these elders witnesses to the letter.  This measure should give you some peace of mind and fix some binding on her and most importantly for saving the marriage. 

Rahul T (Engineer)     29 June 2011

 

Bro,

 

      What is 498A? Why are you worrying about it? As per me the maximum harassments are done. 498A is not worst then beating by local Gundas…

Let me tell you, for 498A anticipatory bail is available. & by the way is very difficult to proof 498A.

A lady, who can make an arrangement to beat you by local gundas….In future she will make your life more miserable. Don’t do this mistake…As per me compromise will never solve your problem, May be currently she doesn’t have any evidence to get divorce form you or she doesn’t have enough evidence to file DV case against you. Therefore she is trying to enter in your life again to collect this avoidance.

 

Compromise could have happened if she was soft. Not after beating by gundas….

 

I am sorry for such rude comment, it purely my personal feelings….

1 Like

gautam (engg)     29 June 2011

Thanks for your quick response Sir,

                       Actually 1 year back, she went to her father’s house without giving me any intimation and stay there for 3 months.

When she came back, I did the same thing what u have written, I have taken letter from her in presence of her parent and relative mentioning that she will not go to her parent house without intimating me and will not do any wrong things.

 

But after that she has done bigger mistake (misuse of DV).

 

Now I am in fear that next time they might use 498a

My next date is no 14-July, can we take letter from her in presence of counselor?

 

Please suggest

Rahul T (Engineer)     30 June 2011

Bro, Then contact your lawyer immediately & apply for anticipatory bail. I don’t know, which state you belong too… But in some state Anticipatory are not getting issued before FIR is made. So, Don’t stay in your home or let other member (like father, mother, sister) stay in your home till you get anticipatory bail. Use your local links in local police station, so that if any FIR is logged then they should inform you before arrest happen. At any cost make sure that you or any member of your family gets arrested by police. You will definitely get bail. That is secondary issue. But harassments is the main cause for specially elderly people. For sure you know that, if she files 498A, the you will get Divorce easily. Read about 498A on the net, you will understand what it is & how thought it is to proof….. We engineer’s can become a Lawyer if require…. Don’t worry or feel lonely. My, moral support is there with you always….

NOTE: Basic Engineering LAW:

“Minimize problem, Don’t extend it”

“Face problem today & make sure future is Bright”

1 Like

(Guest)

I agree with Rahul. She is not trustworthy anymore.

Rohit Shukla (Engineer)     30 June 2011

C'mon Gautam, after getting beaten by Gundas sent by your wife where is the question of compromise? I guess it will not be a compromise, it would be succumbing?

Ambika Prasad Mishra (Lawyer)     30 June 2011

Once u forgive her u cannot raise this fact as ground for divorce unless she commits further cruelity towards u....


(Guest)

Getting divorce will take time... But Fight the case with courage...

Dont ever think to live with her for single minute. 

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     30 June 2011

@ Author

1.
Forgiving between spouse are acceptable between them only at a point when criminal cases and or criminal nature of cause of action (rowdy elements beating you etal) are not undertaken as it is not at all social expectations in Indian context. It is the delicate line either couple are not supposed to embark on no matter how aggrieved they may be between them. 


2.
But when this line is crossed one need to with heavy heart stop compromise i.e. one spouse return back to matrimonial home should be avoided at any cost as such cohabitation never works. Out of the 4 cases that I have experience first hand of 3 failed and last one is any time going to comeback to floor of Court any day. Offcourse such smallest stats. are meaningless but atleast it is there na is the point to consider.


3.
However compromise in terms of withdrawal of all cases and parting way with or without alimony as per mutual understanding between spouses are best alternate way-out to follow for long term peace between affected spouse. Atleast they can restart their respective life in whatever way they want to.  


Colly. reasoning:

Aaz key 41 women empowernment laws key daur mein rooz rooz kanda wada nahi khana chahiye societal health sahi nahi rahega nahi toh boley toh...........


Ta ra rum pum pum........

Bharatkumar (ADVOCATE )     30 June 2011

U r trust on your Wife? She is your wife and u know her. First what's a problem between u? Both r forgot the past tense and stay alone someday or go to picnic alone and understand each other. Mostely many family quarrel each other in our country but we not see and they slove the problem each other and not tell any family person. She is your wife so u first u says that she is stay with me but next time not do any wrong action with me or my family i give lots of love u (her) i think she love u and understand. After marriage Wife is only for her Husband in our country and our Indian history or our country culture.  Both r make for each other says in out religion. So don't worry u invite your wife in your home and give respect, love and she also give u respect and love to u and your family.        


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