husband convincing for divorce

1. The case is about "opportunity cost" nothing else.


2. The case is about "filing soon S. 498a IPC as well as DV Act,2005) nothing else.


My observation is absed on your other message in this forum;

https://www.lawyersclubindia.com/forum/cheater-husband-23394.asp 

How I came to this observation is due to ;


A. A village girl is not exposed to internet and use internet (mostly).


B. A village girl  family does not give "so much amount in dowry" as you say. 


C. A village girl  is "beutician" means enggaged in professional persuits so is cabale to earn.


D. A village girl  does not write perfect english and does not do internet search to land up at legal forum.


E. A village girl  who talks "everyday for hours with her husband" does not need to bank on him when he is not interested in you. The marriage is dead walk out with whatever is left of it.


Take MCD as suggested by your husband and start your own new life.

well thank you for your time, i am village girl, but i am educated i have done masters, i m beautician in a good firm, i cant say that i earn alot but enough for survival.

i am not here to findout ways to hurt my husband or his family, i am here to know what all can be done.

i am really looking forward to save my marrige bcz diavorce gona hurt a lot.

not only me but families also, in villages on such issues people fight like anything.

you are an experienced person, looking foward for some good suggestion.

he is not ready to go to the marrige councellors.

yes in hariyana you cant marry your girl without speding huge money, they sell there lands,

i wanna know about opportunity cost. i searched on net but cant understand how is that matters in my case.

and thanks for complimenting on my english, because my friends says it still require lot more improvement.

@ Strength

These are the things legally you can do;

1. S. 498a IPC on him and his entire family since your family gave dowry as is customary and as said by your reply and he and his family has done "cruelties" upon you after takign the "dowry".


2. You can file S. 12 DV Act, 2005 upon him and your MIL and FIL since they are doing "verbal abuse" on not listenign to your voice that you want to live with your husband.


3. You can file S. 125 CrPC sinc eyou donot earn that much but wants to equate status of your husband.


4. You can also file S. 13 (1) (1a) HMA read with S. 24 HMA upon your husband since he is no more interested in you and is causing cruelties upon you. Moreover since you donot earn that uch as you say inspite of holding Masters Degree and enggaged into "profession" of beutician so you need "ooportunity cost" to run the legal cases.


5. If you have children out of wedlock then you can ask for maintenance for them  too


6. I may be forgetting some other sections under Law whaich you can do as asked but other readers will definitely add up to my above incomplete list so wait for their inputs too.


All above are "opportunity cost" whose search result you could not find while searching so now that you are once again aware what to do then do it and if you still see that after doing all these you can bring a husband back to you then God bless you.....this brief shows that the marriage is dead (agreed it may not be due to your fault) but when "opportunity" there then "take "opportunity cost" and march ahead in your own life is  what I suggest.


I also congratulate you like your "friends" that you write good English inspite of coming from village you have choosen the right husband and right forum to seek "what you can do"


BTW, you case handler - most suitable is Sh. Prabhakar, Ld. Advocate who fights for women's rights and you may ssearch his email ID and cell no. here and all the best :-) 




 

Strength, your english is perfectly fine. Who says village girls can't operate computers. In Tamil Nadu villages they are running Village Knowledge Centres and these are women who are not much educated if we mean by education school and college education. Village girls study and go out to cities for further studies. 

What you have written is sensible. You should not offer a divorce under pressure. Yes, it is an emotional violence, what your husband is doing. I can fully understand your situations because many women go through the similar situations. Ask your husband to attend a marriage councellor, but if he still keep on humiliating you by saying he does not like you, please consult a good lawyer. 

Wait for some helpful posting in this thread also which does not further humiliate you but give tips to how to go about sort it out legally, if you need to. You really need to remain strong. One word of warning: in this forum you will face lot of sarcastic comments for your problems from some of them--just ignore and filter them to have the tips which you think are useful.

RG

@ RG,

How much our ideas match you see your wavelenght exactly matched with mine at 18:30 hrs. as is evident by our two same suggestion exactly at the same time.......god bless the lady with perfect English......

"because wife told about his infidelity to other family members" -  ms. strength in another thread.

"i am not here to findout ways to hurt my husband or his family, i am here to know what all can be done" - strength in this thread.

cut the throat of husband is birth right of a wife.

really beautifull.

THE RESEARCH OF MS. KAUR ON THIS MATTER, REALLY PERFECT.

ALL MOST ALL THE DISTURBED WIFE HAS TWO ISSUES, NAMELY,

1) HER HUSBAND IMPOTENT.

2) HER HUSBAND FALL IN LOVE WITH ANOTHER GIRL.

I NEVER SEEN A HIZRA FALL IN LOVE WITH A GIRL.

ANOTHER RESEARCHER, TOLD THAT - VILLAGE GIRL NOT COMING ON NET, BUT THEY APPEARING ONE AFTER ONE.

WAITING TO SEE THE VILLAGE BOYS COMING WITH HANDCUFF.

wow, so angry, may be ur past.

y would i cut him, yes when i came to know about his cheating i was angry,  because i have seen everything by my own. but marrige is not game where u can change partners every second day, now i accepted that it was his mistake, and we can have good life if he promise me to never do it again.

but he says, y i told to elders now i need divorse. thats wrong.

1. My husband wants divorce on the basis that he dont love me any more. - Means the marriage is dead

2. I talk to him everyday about it but no use, inlaws also ready - Means the marriage is dead and inlaws also party to such dead marriage of children in their wisdom.

3. My family spent so much money on this marrige and now he simply says that he dont like me. - Means Dowry which is customary in their region was exchanged inspite of knowing it is illegal to give and take.

4. The problem was, that he was involved with another women and i opposed it, tell me where was i wrong? - Means the fitrat of man only a man can change and no acts of God can ever change it and opposite of it is also equally true as per changing gender scenario which gender researchers knows better than non sociologist here.

5. When i tried to control him he created a big fight, when i told to elderly people of both families he need divorce, tell me what to do? - Means the option only exists in taking legal recourse and what better than dozen legal cases on head of in laws and husband why shy away form it and such Legal recourse already suggested by RG and myself exactly at the same moment here.

6. He is not ready to carry on this marrige. - Means the marriage is dead and the lady herself is asking a legal question so why hide away from soon to come relaities and justify them in beautiful wordings ! .

7. I talk to him for hours - Means a man does not listen to wife in normal scenario and here the lady says that the man who is listening to a wife for "hours" means there is fault somewhere and not necessarily in the man himself.Listening here means he is simply listenign (and not acting upon them is other step)

8. I am ready to do what ever he wants but nothing working out. what to do? - Means if the lady is ready to "do whatever" even after counceling offers (which are refused by the man) then take divorce via MCD route and/or the second option is to accept the other women in his life why nothing is working out? A lady who speaks wanna and gonna the slangish english inspite of comign from village and getting english education via Tamil Nadu route can speak wanna and goona so she is exposed damn well to modern urban life so this is practical advise if we omitt the "shell questions she is asking in forum" Ms Renuka ji.....

9. Family members gave up after 1 year. - Means they says he marride u for money and now he is done with you? can i get money back? will he get punishment for doing this? what to do. he is forcing me for mutual divorce. - Means she has already done research on dowry giving and takign (when you know about punishgment then why ask in forum means you have made up your mind just wants stamp of approval from legal minds here) and on the go some ld. advocate sending a PM to you and takign up your case. When you say can I get back my money then that is "opportunity cost" why not when you have that mindset on the other hand then why you can't get your money back see all the sections advised by myself you will get not only your money but interest too lady what you are waiting now for !

@ Ms. RG "social bonding" is a phenomena mostly found in "social networking" website and not seen in legal websites which you are suggesting you must be knowing this much atleast. Admit it that it is a "opportunity cost" move and also since you are an expert in "opportunity cost" meaning your article here in some of the post in LCI forum says so then guide the lady on what is "opportunity cost" and what is wrong in it I don't see  anythign wrong in in it.

you are right Renukas, some people really strange here.  it was not expected. either they are harrased by wives or born with hates for women or simply lawyer.

well thanks all of you, i typed in google , marriage and divorce problems and this link was on screen , i enrolled and got into this huge disscussion. with few other forums, on other fourm all people were just saying leave him or go to the counsellor, buy everybody was nice.here some people angry, some people genuine but at least  now i can guess how divorce gona be. here some people are just like angry mother in law, you will never know why she is angry.

n dear arun ji i use gonna, wanna and all other hep words because i am working in saloon, women flunt there style at such places. my employers motivate us to pick and use all such words. u work there one month you will be far better then me. but nobody disscuss husband-wife fight over there. thats why i am here talking to you.

thanks for your time and suggestions.

@ Strength

I stand by my advise and it is in favour for you for the first time since being here from 2008 I give a advise which is in favour of women (wife). All readers before you enrolled in this good forum will atleast say this much that Arun Kumar has talked for the first time in favor of a wife.


And moreover you yourself now admitted that you have already done "forum huntng" so my observations on your two messages with two different subjects today is from my gutt feeling and I stand by it. You have tried talking to HIM straight, you are hip hop and gracely carried the burden of "other women" in your man's life, your family has given huge dowry, you feel that inspite of giving dowry HE is no one women kind of husband, you are subjected to hip clientale which is encouraged by your employer so you know the modernity moresover self rising from "village stamp" so a praise to you is bonus take it in that way.


All the best lady.