Dear All,
I have been working since 2003 and travelling for work (outside hometown) since 2005. From 2003 I have supported by parents through various means: house loan repayment, monthly maintenance, general one-off purchases (an air-conditioner for example). In 2009 I pursued an MBA outside India which I self-financed (loan & savings). When I returned I continued to support my parents through various means: converted my sole a/c to joint a/c, created fixed deposits for future expenses (medical and future wedding of my sister and me), substantial cash amount to create a retirement fund for my parents and general payment for house renovation, family trips, etc. During this period I was working outside India paying taxes at 52% but I converted and transfered all my savings till then to accounts in India and made it accessible for my parents.
In February 2012 amidst talks regarding my marriage we met different people and I finally settled upon (my now wife) S. My parents suddenly at this stage backed out of the talks and my mother in fact expressly forbade me from pursuing the relation further. From Feb-June 2012, amidst considerable disagreement and my repeated attempts at persuasion, I continued to make trips to India and financially support my parents. In June 2012 my father suffered from a cerebral stroke. I flew down to India and arranged for my family's travel and my father's treatment in Bangalore staying and working for more than two months from India and jeopardizing my career.
In Aug 2012 I married in spite of parental opposition and finally broke the news to my mother in December who immediately broke off all relationship and contact with me. I continued to financially support them even though my savings were quickly getting depleted and there was no accounting for expenses by my mother. In Feb 2013 my father experienced a medical complication and my mother contacted me, asking me to return. I did and transferred additional sums of money. Paying approx. 50% tax, with an economically dependent wife, my savings were about to be exhausted. I asked my mother to be economically prudent or at least give me an account of the expenses. She did not heed my request and instead insinuated that this was a request prompted by my in-laws along with other abuse directed towards my wife. From Jan-Oct 2013 she continued to withhold all contact with my father and insisted that I divorce my wife. In Dec she shifted base but refused to give me the address forcing me to fly back without getting to see my father, from the airport itself.
In June 2014 my mother contacted me, asked me to visit my father and insisted she had no financial requests. I flew down to India in Aug and realized that all fixed deposits, joint accounts and additional sums earlier transferred by me had been completely depleted. I naturally offered assistance. However at this stage with an education load yet to be repaid, all savings up till then exhausted and my hopes of saving for my own future and retirement, we agreed to limit the maintenance to a smaller sum, comparatively. My mother verbally agreed on the monthly support sum, agreed to spend more judiciously, agreed to use her retirement fund (that I had created) and accept S and her parents with respect and dignity by arranging a reception for us. As a gesture of reconciliation I spent additional sums of money on buying her gifts (a phone for example) and arranged for flights for the family to go back to our hometown during a festival.
In Oct 2014 my mother abused my in-laws on the phone. In Nov 2014 she made an unannounced visit to their city and attempted to file a complaint against me and my wife in the police station there. She then publicly humiliated them by creating a scene in front of their house. Stunned by these events I called her up asking for an explanation as well as an accounting for expenses which she had stopped giving long back. She responded by sending a letter to my employers here, alleging that I was not supporting her financially and requesting their intervention. This caused irreparable damage to my career influencing employer reaction to her unfounded accusations. In Feb 2015 I restarted paying support money. When I informed my mother of the transfers made and to permit me contact with my father, there was no response. On 23 Apr 2015 I was informed through registered post that a case for an outrageous sum of maintenance (completely outside even my present 'annual' income) had been filed against me by my mother. Completely taken aback I contacted my mother requesting for dialogue. She informed me that my sister was getting married and that I should come to India and support her if she wanted me to withdraw the case. I flew back to India, supported the wedding apart from spending considerable cash amount. However once the wedding was over, my mother refused to withdraw the case.
Since the filing of the case and even before then, my mother has continuously insisted on me divorcing my wife and steadfastly believes that I am supporting my in-laws even though I live outside India and my wife is now earning herself. Any commitment on her part to come to a compromise either on the marriage front has always been subsequently broken. In spite of my consistent financial support and her financial mismanagement, she continues to arbitrarily decide all contact with my father and now I am facing accusations of non-maintenance which are completely untrue. Her abusive conversations on the phone threatening to ruin my marriage and my career prospects have forced me to believe her demand for such an excessive amount are intended to ensure I am never able to start my own family and thus forced to divorce my wife. Her financial insecurities are especially unfounded because she owns residential property, a running business with its own valued real estate, insurance, jewellery (wedding gifts and those bought by my father and me), gold deposits over and above the retirement fund that I had set up for her and the usual monthly support sums.
I tried looking up for legal information online and the trend of elder abuse by children seems to direct all existing laws against a son. Taking these facts into consideration, any advice would be most welcome.
Thankyou for your time.
