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Raazaa2010 (Management)     25 January 2011

Mutual Divorce

Dear Law Experts,

Please let me know all possible option to get the issue resolved.

 

I have been married for 2 yrs and 3 months, in this period last 14 months we are living seperately not even seeing each other.

Even before this period, she was off and on at my house.  She had medical issues and was not active and not able to serve the basic of marital life.

Nov 2009, i had admit her to hospital to treat for apendicities at serious stage and I was there for 5 days at the hospital taking care of her even her family didn't turn up to see her.  During this time, i came to know she had ulcerities for 9 years,  gastric issues.  Post discharge she left me stating she wanted to be her home.

Last one year she was undergoing treatment for gastric AND migraine and having tablets for last 12 month for BP.

Considering the desertion for last 14 months and medical reasons, will the divorce been given at shorter period through mutual consent.

Even this gap didnt change anything in the relationship and highest level of incompatibility between us.

Guide me. 

BR

GR



Learning

 3 Replies

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     25 January 2011

 

 @ Author,


Reading your briefs it reflects ‘neglect’ on your part more than on her ‘duties’
Reasoning: It becomes after marriage a husband’s duty towards his wife to get her medically treated and “look after’ her medical needs post whatever brief period she was attended upon. I see this element missing, may be verbally expressed, but there is a pre-assumption word often used in family law “demand” means she demanded your attention during and post medical but since your mind could not accept her medical condition (which I say is not grave bare reading of your post shows) so you can’t expect her to live on the streets. It is obvious she will return back to her maternal home !

Now, there are two ways out pick one based on josh and hosh;

First bail out plan: If medical issues of her are the main un-compatibility motive then wife and husbands are part and parcel of a ‘package deal’ just after saath phera is general legal view. Give her a choice by medically treating her and save your marriage which is cheaper option than struggling days together in Indian Courts under asked ‘grounds’ which are also doable but they are long race and ultimately no husband comes out clear winner, it is just state of mind which as a reflection from a mirror sustains.


Standby plan: If other than her medical issues there are other un-compatibility issues between you two then advised to sit with neutral elders of both family and based on her rest of the lifespan propose for Mutual Consent Divorce amicably which is second cheaper long term option. However, here the last mile hitch is ‘reasonability’ of both parties by which I mean that to me “reasonability in marriage is nothing but settlement amount” the cause and effect is moneyrama in short of today’s crumbling Indian marriage! Well, it seems from your post, from past 14 months inspite of medical condition your wife, her side of family are legally “quite’ so chances are there of amicable settlement if you also become reasonable to that reasonability funda ! Confused kya….

 

Legal answer to your post which you may by now be thirsty to hear is;


Unless you have already filed a RCR suit and or sent her money for her upkeep and or have proof of your visit to her side of family and have letters, emails / fax and your side can prove before Court that they also went with you to rope her in to comeback to her matrimonial abode then such cases will end up in long cause list of various Courts and in between there could be some damage on your side’s prestige, social status lost, drain of moneyrama on legal fees if she retaliates by filing some maint. and /or as side dish criminal proceedings against your family.


However, all above are micro and macro picture and you are best person to venture accordingly with basic legal knowledge and in company of a accommodating legal pleader before the Court.

So act smart and fast as per your hosh and josh, each as per his/her own capacity and wisdom to get hit by the great Indian Family Law eventually.

All the best… 

Raazaa2010 (Management)     25 January 2011

Hi 

tajobsindia

Thanks for the reply.  On the first point, certain things I cannot be eloborate on the forum, however treatment was given at best hospitals.  Even to take her to hospital, we have literally forced to make sure she gets the treatment, even we have spoken to her parents and they gave reluctant answer she is afraid of hospital and tablets. That after calling many of her relatives and mine to convince her for the treatment and then we were able to save her. I got the blastings from the doctor for the late admission.

Even after discharge, I was doing working from home and help her with basic/domestic help related to her  providing food in time, tablets, helping her on daily activities.  Inspite of it suddenly she stopped eating from home and even i was buy food from out even though it is not advisable.  From my side as a husband i have provide all possible assistance to make her better.   Inspite of it, she left to her native.  Worst part is she returned from her home only 4 months back (during my father's death) and she took the treatment and left immediately.  Even many time we have called her back, she was giving different reasons that she under treatment for different medical reasons - migraine, gastric issue and BP.

I have taken her for counselling to doctors, many of her and my relatives (common to both families) counselled her, still she is not changed.  Even my mother had attempted many times with big snub on her face.


Even when my father was alive, he was doing the same thing and he went to the extent to go to her house and also counselled.  In turn he had been tortured for 4 hours with filthy words, harassment and threatening.  He was advised to do angioplasty which he didnt inform us when all this were happening.  He survived only 2 months after the visit.  This we came to know after his death, reading his diary and one of his doctor informing us on the same.

Medical issue is not the reason for incompatibility.

Hoping everything goes good, if she agrees for MCD, how long will it take to get divorce considering the last 14 months seperation.


Avnish Kaur (Consultant)     25 January 2011

6 MONTHS more, if she agrees for MCD.


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