Please help

Hi Debarati

With due respect, you just want to sckew you life & entangle your daughter's life with this legal cases. You want to teach your x-husband a lesson or you want to give yourself & your daughter a fair chance  to live a peacful life? What extacly you want? What do you think, a 498 will solve all your problems? the answer is NO! it will further take everyone down (harsh to say, you & your daughter too, invloving time, cause obviously your husband & his lawyers wont leave it as it is)

Better, you & your parents & elders must sit with husbands family and discuss the issue. Obviously violence is never tolerated. Opt for MCD with conditions of Alimony for yourself and your daughter. All the best..! Understand one small thing, eye for an eye, leave the world blind...!

Originally posted by : Debarati
	I am having ccases like 125, domestic violence, 498 against my husband. I dont really want a single penny from him, just wanted him and his family to realise their faults. But at this point I realise that they will never do it. Inspite he have file divorce petition. I dont want to give him divorce but I am having a daughter who is of 3 years and I alone take all care of her. I now with private not well to do job at this crisis time. i relised that he do not love me.  Excusse me, he do not love you?  He had se x with you right, that itself is love.  Love means se x only and nothing else.  After he loved you, you became pregnant and delivered baby, that is the process of love. I am in delima wheter to give him divorce, since the charges of cases is too much and I am struggling. My daughter is also growing. I feel he is with some other women. please sugest what should I do? Talk to husband, show him love and ask him to mend his ways not to go behind other women.  If you had given him LOVE then why would he go behind other woman seeking LOVE?  You did not give him Se x ie LOVE so he is finding Love at other place.  Common sense. So, give him love, tell him his daughter misses him, show him daughterly love and get him back and start leading happy marital life. 1) If I do not want to divorce throughout my life, is it possible? Yes.  Go court and tell I not agree to give divorce.  Simple.   2) If I die will it be possible for my parents to demand money from my husband for my daughter? and in which condition? If you die your parents cannot ask money from your husband for your daughter, your daughter can in turn file alimony case and get alimony till she become adult ie till age of 16 and not after that, after that she can file DV case asking money for her studies.   3) If I give him divorce and after certain years I die, will there be any option to ask money from him?(my parnts are not rich so they will not be able to spend much money on cases.) If you give him divorce, ask money first, take money and then give divorce, once divorce is over, you can ask permanent alimony to husband provided he is of healthy condition and can earn and give money as alimony, if he has some disease he cannot be asked to give you alimony, you can ask money u/s 125 crpc. and why do your parents come into the picture?  Did you marry him for sake of money? So that he can look after your parents?  If that was the idea behind getting married, you should have informed your husband that you are marrying him so that he will take care of your parents along with you, and only after he agreed to such condition you should have married him, unlike simply marrying him and then putting conditioin after marriage!  It appears that you married this man only for money and nothing else. What I suggest is, you go back to husband, take back all the cases and lead happy marital life for sake of daughter instead of begging for money in court hall. You can ask money under 125 crpc, DV, but that will get you money but not husband and not father for your girl child. Think.  Talk to husband, its easier and lot better to bow down to husband than to bow down to some stranger sitting in court.   Why I used the word begging? In your petition or application in court, you will write, the RESPONDET/PEITIONER BEGS TO SUBMIT... hence the word begging..   I really dont want a penny neither divorce. But this point I feel he had never loved me, loves me and will never love me.I am not able to bear the court expenses, his harsh words and time wastage. Please sugest what should I do? If you are not able to bear court expenses, ask for appointment of goverment lawyer.

My advice is, go take back your daughter to husband and lead happy marital life.  There aer many people in this world who are craving for children, craving for a husband, craving for a wife. you have it all in your hand, dont blow it up by approaching some more court halls.  Go back to husband now.

Thanks for the advise Sir.

But today I find that this you legal advisors are the reason for the crimes.

If you say s*x is a love then sir rapes are also the same. I hope you know the defination of rape whether you attain it forcefully through strenght or by wicked mind.

Today I feel that I should divorse my husband because he is just of the same mentality as that of yours. 

why should I ask a help from the beggers of love like you? first you find your perfect love and then answer me.

Gyan Prakash your studies are just in vain. You are a good for nothing that I am sure you will find at the end of your life.

respect your mother, siter and wife. Dont grade them they are all differnt but equally important.

Totally dis-agree with Mr. Gyan Prakash. even I'm a victim of a false 498, 406, here, when the quriest have already mentioned about the violence and physical torture by her husband, then how can she will re-unite with her husband, at least, for what? when she is bold enough to come in a public forum and discuss her problems, then she must be brave enough to walk out of it too, even with the child. whatever happens violence should not be tolerated. A husband wife's relationship doesnt mean "A RIGHT TO HURT THE WIFE PHYSCIALLY", ofcource, there are mis-understandings, but when a couple is old enough to marry, have s*x, and make kids, then, they should be, matured enough to sort the differences out in terms of way of thinking, if they cant, take help of elders from both the side, if that doesnt help too, walking out is the best option. But any which way violence should not be tolarated and also a matured mind must also understand the differences between "MIS-UNDERSTANDINGS" & "VIOLENCE"

) If I do not want to divorce throughout my life, is it possible?

THAT TOTALLY DEPEND ON THE EVIDENCE HE WILL BRING IN THE COURT.  INDIAN COURTS ARE HESITANT TO GIVE DIVORCE, AND MORE SO IF THE HUSBAND IS FILING SUCH CASE.  ESPECIALLY, IN YOUR CASE, AS HE HAS GOT EXTRA-MARITAL AFFAIR AND IF YOU PUT IT EFFECTIVELY IN YOUR REPLY TO HIS DIVORCE CASE, IT IS VERY DIFFICULT FOR HIM TO GET DIVORVCE.  EVEN, AT SOME POINT OF TIME, THE COURT COMES TO SUCH A DECISION THAT THE MARRIAGE HAS BEEN BROKEN BY THE ERRANT HUSBAND AGAINST INNOCENT WIFE, THE COURT WILL DIRECT THE HUSBAND TO APPROPRIATELY COMPENSATE THE WIFE AND CHILD.  SO, IT IS DIFFICULT FOR HIM TO GET DIVORCE.

2) If I die will it be possible for my parents to demand money from my husband for my daughter? and in which condition?

NO MADAM.  WHEN YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT DEATH AT THIS YOUNG AGE, I WORRY THAT YOU HAVE BEEN NURTURING SOME ILL INTENDED THOUGHTS OF COMMITTING SUICIDE. DO NOT DO THAT.  AFTER YOUR DEATH (EITHER NATURAL OR SUICIDE), IT IS VERY DIFFICULT TO YOUR PARENTS TO GET ANY AMOUNT FROM HIM.  LAW ALLOWS YOUR PARENTS TO FILE MAINTENANCE CASE AGAINST YOUR HUSBAND AFTER YOUR DEATH, BUT IT IS VERY DIFFICULT FOR THEM TO FOLLOW UPTHE CASE IN THEIR OLD AGE.  NOW, YOU CAN FILE CASE UNDER SECTION 125 CR.P.C. SEEKING MAINTENANCE FOR YOURSELF AND YOUR CHILDREN AND YOU WILL DEFINITELY GET MONTHLY MAINTENANCE FROM HIM.  ENGAGE A GOOD ADVOCATE FOR IT.

3) If I give him divorce and after certain years I die, will there be any option to ask money from him?(my parnts are not rich so they will not be able to spend much money on cases.)

NO. AT THE TIME OF DIVORCE, YOU CAN MOVE AN APPLICATION FOR PERMANENT ALIMONY AND THE COURTS WILL DIRECT YOUR HUSBAND  LUMPSUM AMOUNT FOR YOUR MAINTENANCE AND ALSO FOR MAINTENANCE, STUDIES AND MARRIAGE OF CHILDREN.