Why hiding marital situation or problems does not help?
A metro woman can hide her problems, and has the advantage of shedding tears when asked or pushed to the wall. Many people will take the words coming out of a woman's mouth as the gospel truth once they are backed by tears flowing down her rosy cheeks.
A metro man who sheds tears will get rejected first by his own parents, siblings, friends, colleagues and termed colly. as a loser or shirker.
A metro man who is not ashamed or embarrassed about his marital issues will get respect. Most married people know that married life is not easy, so they will believe your side of story to have truth in it.
It need not mean you have to tell about your marital problem to every colleague, paan-wallah, maidservant etc. But not letting close friends, trusted people know about it is also a very bad idea. Because that will mean you will have to make excuses when opportunity comes to go to a family function, celebration, event etc. A suspicion can arise that why did you hide it for so long, and if you may not be at fault about it.
Let people who are close know about it. For all others, you can disclose only necessary information as and when the situation arises – not before and not after. E.g. a known person calls after a while and invites you and wife to an event… just say clearly that she does not live with me anymore. The amount of details you disclose depend on how close that person is to you. Disclose the most to those who trust you and are willing to help you, for the others keep it on need basis. People have enough problems of their own, so don't try to burden someone if they can't help you much or are not interested in your details.
Work for men rights. If you are helping cause of men, people will trust that you have a genuine problem and not at fault. If you try to hide, at best you can expect neutral opinion. The other problem is that more you delay, more people will forget about you and your side of the story. After a few years, you will get stuck till one of the parties decides to go for mutual divorce. All this while if you help others, you will feel good and confident, and be able to increase your social circle too.
Credits: Yodha and Dr. SIFF
