Hi,
I am posting my prblm here with a hope that may be i'll find gud guidance and solution to my prblm.
To give you a complete picture:
>Divorce with mutual consent happened in 2009 with nil alimony/child support from him till date as he was jobless and i was employed with a govt. bank.
>It was a mututal understanding between him and me that i wont ask for any money from him and he wud let me live peacefully with my kids. I now realsie how foolish i was at that time. He had tortured and abused me but i just wanted to get away from him asap at any cost as i had no supprt. My own conservative parents were pressurising me to continue with him and i cudnt afford to live on my own.
>At that time, I took the physical custody as well as whole-sole financial responsibility for my 2 daughters, aged 10 and 8 as on date which continues till today. There was no mention of this in the divorce judgement/decree.
>Since then, I've been living with my kids at my parents place and also have been giving him full visitation rights and he talks to kids almost everyday over phone even though his attitude has been negative. e.g. telling daughters ...why cant ur mother do blah blah for u...she doesnt have enough time to spend with u..she gets such rubbish clothes for you..etc etc. trying to poison their minds. I've been ignoring this becoz of the non-supportive attitude of my parents. They say as long as u live here, we don't want him to come to our house to create tamasha of any kind in front of other ppl. And everytime i object to him swearing or shouting at me or misguiding the kids, he either shouts and threatens that i wil come to ur house right now and i'll see who can stop me from speaking to my kids. Once he also said that if u try to stop me frm seeing them, i'll just vansih with them, u wont even know where they went. Another time he also said i'll get you killd b*tch.. the story is unending. Anyway, moving forward...
> Now, due to personal (My parents will be moving to another city within next 6 mnths) and professional circumstances (I might get posted outside the city myself), it was not pssbl for me to continue the same schooling for my kids for this year. I gathered all my hard earned savings till date and got my kids admitted to a boarding school in another state without informing him as i feared that he might create problems for me.
>The kids are adjusting well in the new environment. I've directed the school authorities not to allow the father any access to the kids without my consent as I am afraid that might try to bias their minds again against me and the school which he as done on previous occasions. (WHen I told my kids that i was thinking of putting them in hostel because of the situations, they shared it with him innocently (he talks to them almost everyday over phone) and he filled up their minds with things like boarding schools are the worst place, kids there turn bad, ur mom is only thinking of her selfish reasons, tell her u wont got to hostel etc. etc. He even threatend me on many occasions.
> I am still a single divorcee, focusing on my job and kids after almost 6 yrs of separation, while he is now total 3 times married with still no wife living with him and mostly jobless, working hardly 6 mnths in a year with some call centers etc. Rest of the time he asks for money from his sis who works in the US for his own expenses.
FINALLY> I am all alone in this fight. Now that the kids are growing up, I strongly feel that the father's influence on them will only be negative as he doesnt accept his faults rather justifies them in front of kids and even provokes them against me who is doing so much for them. He has never given me a single penny for the kids even though it has been really financially tough for me. He can never be a gud example of an adult.
MY QUESTION>>Now that I have taken this step of admitting my kids to boarding school in a 3rd state without his consent, am i under any legal obligation to reveal the details to him? What can he do against/ to stop this? What should i do to be prepared? Can I do something to ensure he is not able to disturb the kids and their studies and me living a peaceful life anymore?
I AM SORRY I'VE TYPED A REALLY LONG STORY TO GIVE U A COMPLETE PICTURE FRM BEGINNING.
LOOKING FWD TO UR GUIDANCE.... pls. help !!! THANKS IN ADVANCE.
NEELAM, NOIDA
