In brief:
- Blessed Sinful couple get married as per Hindu Traditions during May 2012.
- Due to misguided and mischievous tricks and advices by her parents and grand parents, wife tries to create lot of fights between husband and his parents.
- For silly reasons, frequent quarrels occur between wife and husband. Husband tries to negotiate but in vain, finally stops talking to her.
- Without husband's knowledge, Wife immediately complaints to her parents over her phone and during Husband's absence, invites her parents to her laws home, abuses and creates a big fight among the parents.
- Later, Husband demands sorry to be asked to his parents but the wife refuses and deserts the husband from November 2012.
- Intermittently, Wife tries to convince husband to live separately, leaving his elderly parents.
- Husband never agrees to wife's illogical demands. Wife tries to dominate and informs his office superior's to tarnish his image.
- On September 2013, Frustrated Husband leaves the country on Work Permit to avoid mental depression.
- On December 2013, wife along with her parents lodge false dowry harassment case in All Women's police station.
- Police warn the husband's parents.
- Police call the husband's office to confirm his whereabouts.
- Police caution the husband to return back to India otherwise case would be filed.
- In dilemma, Husband requests for months time to complete his job commitments.
- Husband collects evidences such as SMS, Mails and Chats which can prove that there were only multiple arguments and failed compromises between the couple but no demand for dowry.
- Husband searches for available resources and forums to save him and his family's image in the society.
In detail:
With all hopes and dreams, I, R***i got married to A***n as per Hindu tradition on 23rd May 2012 in Madras, India.
As per tradition, the first week we stayed in her parent's house and then later, we stayed in my parent's house which was very much closer to her parent's house as well.
Without any reason, she wanted to have my blood test done for HIV and when we had an argument, she told me to get out of her house.
Though she was adamant and mischievous in her ways, I initially presumed that she is childish because she is the only daughter of her parents but will always help the family to be united.
Due to misguided advices from her grandparents and parents, she created all sort of gimmicks and used to harass me frequently. She always used to tell me that her dad is the only man in this world and I'm a coward who always listens to my parent's advices.
Unfortunately, she turned out to be a very rude, dominating boyish character and she wanted me to leave my elderly parents.
Though her father is an atheist, during Aadi Month(July-August) he informed that it's inauspicious to stay together and immediately, she left me and stayed with them for a month.
She doesn't respect my parents and wanted me to leave my parents. She tried to be dominating and wanted me to tune to her requirements.
My parents considered her as their daughter and helped her in all the ways.
My mother used to do the cooking, washing. She always complaints about the food that my mother cooks and informs everything to her house
My father used to assist her and has used his pension fund to pay premiums and medical insurance for her.
She regularly informed her parents of the happenings in our house and tried to create trouble.
She grudges that I should not spend any part of my income on my parents and instead a perfect husband should give the salary to her. She keeps comparing and always says that her house and her parents were far better. She also used to enquire about my property share.
She never used to let me work or study and constantly used to trouble me saying that I don't have any feelings for her.
She harassed me mentally and played all sort of dramas like throwing the mangal sutra at me, tearing her hand with glass, burning her hands with candle flame, eating rat poison, leaving me and sleeping in different room.
She told me that she doesn't care even if I sleep with 10 girls.
She always harasses me saying that only girls are innocent and pure but boys all are wicked and has many illegal wives.
I always wanted to live a good standard of living. I helped her in applying for reputed schools and Banks but she was never interested in joining a good job.
I also helped her in joining NIIT and paid the entire fees so that she can accompany me to Onsite. She completed the course and was trying to get a decent job but due to misguidance by her parents and grand parents, she stopped searching for interviews or jobs.
She refused to do any work in the home as well. When asked, she told me that her father and grand father only used to do the house work and a proper man would do the same.
She constantly pestered me for gifts and jewels from me and used to torture me that I'm not a perfect husband.
She used to constantly nag me saying that I don't take her outside frequently.
To fulfil her demands, I bought her jewellery; I took her to Malaysia for honeymoon for a week and every weekend, used to take her to Dramas and Plays.
In Malaysia, she shockingly asked me whether I’ll kidnap and take nude photos of her and upload it in Facebook.
She refused to keep the stridhan in the house saying that she has no belief in my parents. I was forced to open a Joint account locker after paying huge security deposit in the bank. The locker account is dormant since then.
How her silly planned fight began:
During Deepavali as part of Hindu tradition, my in-laws are supposed to give the Nombu Kayiru(Sacred Thread) to us but they refused to give saying that they are atheist and do not follow tradition. Instead to create fights, they came to my house and gave two apples to her. I was very much angry and disappointed that instead of giving the fruits to elders, her parents had given the apples to her without respecting my parents.
In our room, she cut the apples into halves for us both. I informed her to cut the other apple and share it with my parents. She reluctantly agreed and went to my parent's room and came back.
Later, I found that she had never shared the apples with my parents and has eaten it all by herself.
I was shocked to see how selfish she is for silly reasons. I stopped talking to her from that night. This mischievous girl immediately informed her parents over phone and the next day, without my knowledge once I've left to the office, she called her parents to my home and created a big fight with my parents. Based on the information I received, she couldn't control her temper, abused and tried to hit my father also.
I was very upset and later, I told her to ask sorry to my parents. During Deepavali, her parents called us home. I was hesitant to go but due to my parent's request, I went to her home as it was our first Diwali. There, her tone changed and she started to be dominant me. I informed her to ask sorry to my parents for the mischievous acts committed by her but she refused blatantly. I left her house alone disappointed. Since November 2012, we have been living separately.
She later tried to convince me to live separately, leaving my elderly parents but I never agreed to her. I insisted that her unless she asks sorry to my parents, I would never be able to live with her. Multiple meetings were conducted with her friends and relatives to reach a compromise but she never agreed to ask sorry to my parents. After many futile attempts and waiting for nearly one year in Madras, I got mentally depressed and I couldn't concentrate on my work. To live in a peaceful environment, I wanted to move away from India and finally, during September 2013, I came to London on 1 year work permit.
On December 2013, she along with her parents have lodged dowry harassment case in All Women's Police station that we have demanded 10 lacs and a watch. The police have spoken with my parents and enquired about me but they haven’t shared the complaint in detail. Later, they have also called my manager and checked my whereabouts due to which reputation in my neighbourhood and Office has been tarnished. I spoke with the Sub Inspector over phone who kindly assisted me that I'll have to return back to India soon as her parents wants to FIR. I informed the police that I've come on Work Permit recently and I need at least a couple of month’s time since it's a critical period in my company. The police have agreed but told me that they can’t delay the petition further.
I'm in big dilemma. I've tried to collect as much evidence as possible and I've the SMS, Gmail, G-Talk evidence in the phone sent by her to me.
The evidences collected prove that were only arguments and conflicts between the couple but there was no demand for dowry.
I personally have no interest in ornaments and never have I asked her for dowry though she has only constantly nagged me for gifts and jewels.
Please guide me how do I prove my innocence, avoid my stay to coming to India unnecessarily and save the reputation of me and my family in the society.
