House owners association often asking donations for some reason

Understand the fact that for common good, the EC or General body takes a decision taking into account the welfare of all residents after much deliberations.  If you feel that maintenance is on the high side and not justified, move the matter with like-minded persons and oppose it openly.  Also, contact other resident associations in your area, compare such maintenance and services provided.  When a resolution is passed in Association, it should be binding on all members without exception, as the funds are not meant for personal use and for the welfare of residents.

I understand from your query that apart from the monthly maintenance, the Society people are asking Adhoc amounts towards functions, etc. If they are asking for donations, which are purely voluntary.  If you do not wish to donate, you can politely inform "no" to them.

Yes, request for such donations, unless authorised by the bylaws or the GB does not amount to depend. The member, at his discretion, has the option to refuse. 

If the owner is not capable to pay maintenance (as decided by general body of association) it is better to sell the property and leave the society.

Why donation(s) for your residence ???