Police taking decision on child custody

You case is is a classic case of patriachal societal behaviour and you seems to be at wits end with no male support.

This is not going to end well.

You had quite a few options and due to work/money/hope-for-best you have let them slip off.

You should have continued the DV. It would have given you some relief on maintainance and you could have applied for divorce with legal custody of your children.

And leaving behind children with caretaker (lack of natural guardian even if it is your mother) would easily give him an upper hand to claim custody of children.

And you have to travel abroad again. So you have limited time.

So here is what you can do is juggad.

Take another hit (please bear with me). Just make a staement to police you are willing to stay with him.Leave your children with your mother and go and stay with him. Leopards spots don't change. he is being him, he will abuse you. Take the proof and go to CAW of local police station. This is your only way out. Old cases won't stand unless pursued. You have to show his true colour.

You have enough on your plate to think any option legally. Do kasti mein jee nahi skathe.

Simply you have close the door.

Alternatively, vacate your mother and children to another city far away and let them start new life. You go aborad and come back and then take up issue.If styaed in same place things will turn ugly.

Originally posted by : Priya
	Hi, I am living separately with my daughters aged 5 yrs and 3 yrs due to my husband physical n verbal abuse towards us. We are not divorced yet. He never took care of kids. He started abusing me in mails and started sending mails to my employer threatening me to sign in divorce papers. When I filed police complaint for this, they didn't take any action. All of a sudden he filed child custody complaint on me and police is forcing me to send the kids with him on weekends. Even if I say kids will not be safe with him since he used to beat them as well. My elder daughter is afraid of him. 1. Do the police have the authority to decide on police custody? And what happens if I don't send the kids with him? 2. I will be traveling soon to onsite for 6 months and my mom number will be taking care of the kids. What should I do to make her as legal guardian in the absence of me. She s been taking care of kids right from their birth since am working. Please help me.

You keep marrying, your mother will look after your kids?  Is that what you married for?

Regarding your mother become legal guardian, it is not possible since you need to take permission from your husband for it, and the matter is not even in court for court to decide with whom kids will be.

Its better to leave kids with you husband and go onsite than leave them with your mother who is their granny.

Since you say that since birth the kids have been taken care of by your mother, you never really went back to your husband than to have s*xual intercourse.

Dangal is a movie which shows even girl childs are as good as sons, but that is when they have both parents together caring for them.  Throw in divorce into Dangal, even Aamir khan would not make a movie like Dangal.  Hope you get the point.  Its not easy for girl child once parents move court for divorce.  You might move on, but kids wont be able to move on, it will have lasting effect on their minds.   Think about all this before taking any awkward decision.

Good marriages require patience, kindness, humility, sacrifice, empathy, love, understanding, forgiveness, and hard work for he sake of your kids future. Following these principles should help any marriage to improve. The essence of them all can be summed up in one sentence: Always treat your spouse the way you would like to be treated. If you follow this rule, your marriage will have a much greater chance for success. If you discard this rule, failure is just around the corner.