shalini (software engineer) 19 October 2012

Which one is better for wife seeking for seperation

Ive seen in other forums that , working wife wont get any alimony or compensation. what about dowry and expenses spent by her family in marriage ?/ will she get back that ?? if wife salary is half salary of husband? how much she can expect ?? or else going for all this is head ache ??My parents dont want me to involve in court matters which usually take years taking of the valuable time? what if its mutual divorce??? my parents tell me to forget the horrible past and move on with life , taking revenge and puting them in bars is just waste thing and bad thing .even i feel same , am 26 yrs old , i been in trauma for 2 yrs ..major thing is the health , where its like killing me , staying with this guy makes my health ruin...is it better to put case and get into mess or just give him divorce and move on??? i know my in laws and husband harassed me like hell, where i can prove everything and am sure they cant get out of the case if i go for it .Afterall life is short , why all this disturbances ..hmmm ...confused

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ANEESH TRIVEDI (ADVOCATE) (Advocate) 19 October 2012

Originally posted by : shalini

Ive seen in other forums that , working wife wont get any alimony or compensation.

No this is not the case working wife also get depends on merits of case.

what about dowry and expenses spent by her family in marriage ?/ will she get back that ?? if wife salary is half salary of husband? how much she can expect ?? or else going for all this is head ache ??

She can claim for it in her case..

My parents dont want me to involve in court matters which usually take years taking of the valuable time?

parents suggestion is good no need to waste life/time/ money/energy in the court proceeding as it is slow process and some time not upto expected outcome.

what if its mutual divorce??? my parents tell me to forget the horrible past and move on with life , taking revenge and puting them in bars is just waste thing and bad thing .even i feel same , am 26 yrs old , i been in trauma for 2 yrs ..major thing is the health , where its like killing me , staying with this guy makes my health ruin...is it better to put case and get into mess or just give him divorce and move on???

if you are not making your mind or not in the condition to continue with him for ever it is better to get seprate go for MCD. means divorce by mutual concent in that sort out the middle way and apply for divorce.better if compication are more go for unconditional divorce you get rid of husb in 6 months,

i know my in laws and husband harassed me like hell, where i can prove everything and am sure they cant get out of the case if i go for it .Afterall life is short , why all this disturbances ..hmmm ...confused

If you go to prove then you have to file cases casess took almost 3-4 years, if they are also aware of laws and want to play law game then they will go for revision / appeal , then go to high court..........agin 2-3 years get lost now imagine waste of time /money / health and peace and after this long battle you get nothing and also a tag of fighting girl , if kasaab can enjoy life then do you think? indian judiciary will give decision on your matter soon and arrest you in laws,

shalini i am under 498A and on bail what is happening i am living normal life as before in mean time i lived with my wife and blessed with daughter and frankly speaking now i m using it as tool for my convinient as marriage or any occassion is there in my in laws house i say i have to go for 498A hearing and date is there so this is shamful for them in front of their relative , and even when one offer come for my SIL they refused after knowing this, so to fight for justice is good but see in returen what are you getting? truely said life is too short , now just think your past life your 26 years are just passed like 26 seconds just like a film of 26 second so rest life will also pass so enjoy it forget bad memories, and dont get confused on the matter of life always be straight and positive ,

irsha, badla, grana ye jindgi ki khushi ke liye dimak saman hai. to manushya ko jeete ji hi khokla karne ki koshis karte hai.

badla lekar sukh milta hai shanti milti hai to lado aur jeeto.

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner ) 20 October 2012

1. Hon'ble SC has said in catena of Judgments that marriage expenses cannot be returned back. So there your second question is thus legally answered.

2. If you have made up mind on MCD then involve a neutral person to make reason with your husband / his side and with reasonable one time alimony (keep it reasonable) both of you can proceed on MCD route. It is safe and just minimum 6 months time based. This way your main theme of this thread post is socially answered for all parties to go back justified.

3. If husband is interested in plain vanilla MCD (without reasonable one time alimony) then he has to be reasonable enough after hearing MCD thoughts to return honestly atleast your stridhan and get over with MC Divorce.

4. Separation is not a good choice. The major difference between divorce and legal separation is that legal separation does not dissolve a marriage. Therefore, spouses who are only legally separated cannot remarry without getting a formal divorce. This has the potential benefit of making it fairly easy for the couple to reconcile and continue their life together as married spouses, if they desire, without having to go through the marriage process again. Reading your two threads till date we feel legal ‘separation’ may not be of benefit to you currently.

If para 2 and 3 are not possible with neutral persons reasoned talks showing husband clearly what the Law and years it brings to young couples life then you have no other option left with other than to make use of adversial Law of the land. That is what contemporary Indian marriages today are all about and once thru with it re-start your life be it so if it takes your next 4 - 6 years to restart and sometimes by just usage of the very first steps under adversial Law other party (either spouse) comes to mediation table so if that is what history is meant to be read as I don’t see it was a bad option one was left with but then use it with great caution as it is addictive in wrong hands just like dope J.

One can say reasonably that a 28 years old world traveled r/w well forum posting read in past several days can always now make a wise decision!

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shalini (software engineer) 22 October 2012

while taking divorce..is it must to give alimony to wife??? just am curious if so how much can i expect from my husband, present am not working but i am hardly trying to join IT job immediately after returning to India which is ver much important for my growth, he earns 7000$ per month which is 3.5 lakhs per month ..Am 25 yrs old , ive got married wen am 23, ive seen enough coz of my disturbed marriage...his earnings are good, during marriage they demanded and took heavy dowry in form of cash from my parents and later my MIL told to every one that its love marriage no dowry , but they took dowry infront of mediators , elders...which bothers me is my dad borrowed some money and spent for wedding ,he has done that so his only daughter gona be happy..these fellows they took advantage of each step....they bluffed and got married..so just in case how much i can expect alimony ...

vishak (manager) 22 October 2012

Based on commercial analysis, you can expect as below

1)Actual dowry given by you less any asset with you or in your name purchased after marry. plus

2) Your reasonable monthly expenses including rental house / 0.01 (This would result in an asset that would fetch you 12% PA return)

If you are not bothered for point no-1, then treat is as an wrong investment in shares and consider only point no-2, he will be agree easily.

shalini (software engineer) 22 October 2012

please answer me clearly??? vishak

vishak (manager) 23 October 2012

Suppose you had given dowry worth Rs 10 lac and now you need Rs 15000/- per month for your reasonable life (Assuming your hi profile life style you will meet by your own job/earning) then your alimoney amount calculates as below:

1) Rs 10 lac dowry (Assuming you have no asset in your name purchased out of your hubby's salary after marry)

2) plus Rs 15000 / .01 = Rs 15 Lac

Total Rs 25 Lac. That is as per market prevalent as minimum and reasonable.Rest depends upon negotiations.

Then return to ur parents point no-1 & keep with you point no 2 in mutual funds fetching 12-15% annual returns and live your tensefree life.

shalini (software engineer) 23 October 2012

when husband is getting 40 lakhs per anum and for me 15 lakhs is the life time alimony ???? right ??he didnt purchase anything on his name first of all. he never purchased anything on my name...after divorce only he will purchase on his name .....ok leave it am not much bothered about alimony...my question is .....if any one goes for MCD .....is alimony must??? he should give alimony to his wife???? Now i am in US, i am facing bad situation... he is pressurizing me to give divorce...but i said i will give it in India..because here i cant fight alone..what should i do now ?? whether to take money from parents n book ticket n come to india or just face thing or to give divorce in US

vishak (manager) 23 October 2012

...my question is .....if any one goes for MCD .....is alimony must??? he should give alimony to his wife????

Practically Alimony is given in lieu of 498A & DV cases, if no 498A is filed and only DV is filed for maintenance,then in case of MCD you will be paid monthly nominal sum as decided by court till u remarry.If 498A is filed by you he will be facing simaltaneously.