Wife toturing-please help
Ravi
(Querist) 18 September 2012
This query is : Resolved
Courtship since 2005 . Introduced to both families 2006. Families met in Apr 2007. Mutual understanding. Agreed for marriage in Nov 2010 (due to exigency on bride’s family end. Marriage in Feb 2011. Left 4 husband's workplace within 15 days of marriage (citing job/study as reasons). Since visited family ONLY twice.
Came 2 Delhi in June 2012. Husband 4 job. Wife 4 preparing for PG exams. Shifted to girls hostel (arranged by husband) near her coaching classes 2 save time. Husband stayed back at brother’s residence. Husband shifted to boys hostel due to job/study constraint in Aug. Since then relation has deteriorated sharply, altough, it was never very harmonious, with wife constantly nagging, fighting on trivial issues.
1.Excessive influence of in-laws, particularly M-I-L.
2.Psychopathic behavior, physical fight in moving car, fighting at metro station at 11 pm
3.Left home twice, came back after persuasion. Left home on 13/8 after fighting on non-issue, defying husband/elder brother
4.Had night-out with an unknown female relative without permission/information from/to husband
5.Shifted to some unknown girls hostel, without knowledge/permission from husband/family and not willing to give address
6.Not heeding to husband/family appeal to come and discuss issues. Declared not to come home/go to home-town
7.Husband’s family approached bride’s father over phone, apprising him of situation and requesting to come-over to help sort-out issues. Father unwilling to comply, saying it’s your family matter, better handle yourself and behind the scene entire family conspiring.
8.Trying to level frivolous charges on husband/family
In past, since marriage/courtship
1.Belittling personal/academic/family of husband
2.Fighting on petty issues
3.No care/love/respect
4.Wants husband to severe his all relationships-Parents/Family/friends
5.Demoralizes husband repeatedly in family/social circles
In view of these, please advise:
1.What can be the actual agenda of the girl/ family?
2.Based on your experience, do you see any meaning in trying to make this relationship work?
3.Going by increasing ever-hostile behavior, where do you see this heading? Meaning, what can be their next possible steps
4.What precautions we need to take to safeguard ourselves from possible allegations/ harassments
5.What do we do to save this relationship
6.Is there any way we can legally stop the in-laws from interfering in our family matter?
7.What should be the appropriate forum to seek support from—like family court etc?
8.Even if the relation survives, how do you view quality of such relationship to be in future?
9.Does it qualify for a case of Desertion/Cruelty/Psychopathy U/s 13 of Hindu Marriage Act
10.What do we do to save the relationship Negotiation/Mediation/Professional counsellin/family court/Restitution of Conjugal rights
11.What if these don’t work?
12.How do we proceed for Mutual Consent
13.How do we ward off from getting alleged with DV, 498A, 406, Sec34 IPC
ajay sethi
(Expert) 18 September 2012
visit a marriage counsellor. she can file case under DV act /498A to harss you and your faimly members . contact a local lawyer .
if she agrees for divorce then go ahead for divorce by mutual consent . other wise it will be a long drawn affair
Sudhir Kumar, Advocate
(Expert) 18 September 2012
your earlier wquery as at
http://www.lawyersclubindia.com/experts/Disturbed-marriage-338046.asp
If they are husband anad wife then why he is not keeping her with him instead of both living in hostels, in same city, like stranger students (even spending more). Something is wrong in psychology. Delhi has thousands of women doing study and living with husbands.
Husband should never (never) expect cordial remation in this type of arrangement. WIfe in such situation has to be nagging and get irritated.
Just try (and try) amicable settlement.
