SIFF member(inlaws) ruined my life,so don't trust them.

this is one side of the story only.

very sorry to know abt u.

u shd not have mentioned your brother inlaws names here in a public forum.u will be easily recognized.

at the time of divorce,did u have any lawyer to represent u so that u cud get a suitable alimony and all ur streedhan?

as u said they all got rid of u very easily after throwing a few bucks on ur face..

my story too has been the same,where my husband also slapped me daily,pulled my hair,called me dirty names that are found in p*rn sites,my mum-in-law took away all my jewels immediately after marriage and never let me keep them,etc.

when my case was filed within 4 months only i was forced to settle it by the mediator who was on their side.on 1st day of mediation she was nice but on 2nd day,her attitude was very -ve and changed towards my family.

she kept forcing me to sign a settlement according to their interests.even my parents and my lawyer were too weak to support me ..and this mediator too is very powerful who became their family member also...while i am not divorced yet

yes u right.girls shud never tolerate so much injustice..and shud take steps to punish such people...i have never been in favour of out of court settlements or mediations with such people who treat u like some animals and want to throw u away...why does our judiciary encourage "compromises" with such people,when they shud be treated with strictness?there was some ruling also by SC or HC llong back,wherein it stated that cases of cruelty to wife cannot be settled out of court...still such compromises are encouraged by the same judicairy..

as a result,such people never learn lessons and misuse their money power by abusing new people again.in my case i came to know from my husband's relative that my mum-in-law on whom i had filed a case had also got her sister divorced long back by playing politics b/w her and her hubby.

not only that she also played politics in her own maayka coz of which all her relatives boycotted another family member for 14 yrs,coz which she was forced to live alone.

and that she also separated her husband from his widowed mum and real sisters right after her own marriage.and when her mum-in-law died,she did not let my hubby visit her house on cremation day!of course she also did not visit the house!

u see this mum inlaw was never taught a lesson by any1...so she continued her politics and interfering nature in everyone's household...and now since my "honourable" mediator let her go scot free,she again will ruin sum1 else's household as no one till now has dealt with her with an iron hand!

her wickedness never got exposed only because of so called "compromises"(read mediations) with people like her who are freed so easily by our pathetically slow judicial system after they throw a few bucks on ur face.

like u i also realised importance of having self esteem and self respect much later,esp. when i was forced by so many people to agree for a divorce and also this biased settlement...

only now i realise i shud have been bolder..like u,i also did not file any case initially as i wanted to return to my husband who's abroad...

but i also realise that even if i had returned to him forcefully,i wud have suffered abuses again..so better to part ways

anyways,u shud come out of ur depression,engage in ur fav. hobbies,daily do a lots of prayers because they give u a lot of mental peace.

go out wid friends...if possible meet a counsellor or pschologist so that she can help u take hold of ur life again..and never ever suffer abuses from any1..

wen ur dad had a heart attack,u shd have realised that ur hubby is not the right person...for he was becoming responsible for ur dad's life...

he's a typical mama's boy who are dangerous to the wife in the long run!

it's better to marry in a simpler spiritual family rather than the one with political contacts,as they will always treat u like a doormat.i dont understand why u got married in a family with political contacts and that too where relations are with SIFF.

remember that if u dont respect urself,no one else will...become bold..it doesnt mean u become bold and misbehave with others.it only means that u shd not let any1 walk over u..i also learn this fact a very hard way...

like u i have also become bitter in my life...but i am also dealing somehow,hoping to come out of these situations one day

so sad my heart goes out to you. SIFF is known to be partial to male members

@ Roshini ji & zimmer zapper. Thankyou verymuch

Women faces alot , and there sufferings doesn't end.  Now iam so afraid that i don't want to marry again. Iam just 26 but i have decided i will never ever marry again. It better to live alone, and take care of my own parents, iam working and taking care of my parents. Iam a spiritual person and i have decided to join NGOs to help poor and needy people & animals.  Marriage is not safe anymore and specially these SIFF fake people. @ roshini ji- what you said is very true , mother in laws should get lessons, only then they understand. They create drama and join SIFF, but the real picture is they themselves are so dominating , greedy and shrude that they deserve such punnishments. 498 & DV cases are very good and justified for such people who think wives are helpless hoars, and once they sleep with you , you can force them to live as slaves otherwise you will file divorce and will leave her. Husbands blackmail this way and make life hell.

@ Manjit kalra- iam not interested to explain you the story and give justifications, men ( husbands) like you make your wives life hell. Because you cannot trust and emphathise with anybody. I feel sad for your wife or the girl with whom you will get married.

what can be her motive?

are boys so bad? 

leaving a girl without a genuine reson?

@ Roshini mam- I have written the names of my husband & brother in law because whomsover knows them and reads this story atleast they will get to know the true story and facts, that how fake are SIFF members. Lot of chandigarh people know my story .

@ Manjit- i don't know but i can see my mother in law wanted money from me, and she wanted to control my life aswell.  Mother in laws break homes, burn homes like this way.

Please tell me manjit sir, do you have any sister who is married ??? If yes then plz ask her and answer me.

Nowdays i don't know whats wrong , but the reality is mother in laws want to keep there sons in there laps, and want to control there lives and this over control and over dominating nature ruins everything. I remember even my daadi ji was too dominating and cunning but atleast my father supported and gave love & respect to my mom, and thats the reason they are still together touchwood. But nowdays such chemistry has vanished.

Inlaws plans games and then they treat their daughter in laws that way, and if their daughter in law doesn't dance on there tunes, then the answer is divorce. Girls who fear from divorce they get and fall itno that trap rest start a legal baatle which is also suffering.

Manjit sir your answer- Boyfriends leave there girlfriends the moment they ask for committment or marriage and husbands leave there wives the moment there wives utter a word from there mouth and speaks truth about there darling moms.

So its always better not to marry, its better to live alone with your friends & family rather then being hoars to husbands and servants to inlaws.

Manjit sir you are a man so you can never understand the pain & sufferings of a woman, and they have go through in there sasural. You all think that wives and woman exaggerate but the truth is different.

i'm a male and i understand and believe you. no one understands what marriage is these days and get into it. i'm sure there are men who really love their female partners.

Manjit

The reason is to keep the daughter inlaw suppressed so that mother inlaw remains the queen of the house forever.

By nature mother inlaws are jealous of daughter inlaw.When they have to share their house and kitchen with someone,they feel insecure.And so start showing the other person down.

Another reason is dowry.If parents succumb to these demands,they can also be kept under the the thumb,so that only mother inlaw's kingdom and power survives.And parents can be made to dance to their tunes.

Some members keep saying girls' parents are responsible for not educating her,partriarchal society blah blah blah is responsible.The author of this thread seems educated.Still the blame will go to her parents.As if a ghost is demanding dowry!

Here it's v.clear that the mum inlaw is making the son and the remaining family dance to her tunes and men are also hitting the wife because they are spineless.

Simple!

This is the story of all Indian households.

Ask any psychologist why mum inlaws and husbands behave like this.They will also say the same thing.

In your school and college life also you must have seen cat fights b/w girls,where one girl is taunting,bullying,or constantly making fun of the other female who seems weaker.Men usually don't engage in such stupid bullying pursuits.This is 1 quality I appreciate in men.

In LCI also,you must have seen "few women" trying to show the other woman down, who disagrees with her views,because she feels she "should be followed" .Because,someone from the govt. dept. wrote in a calligraphic style a few extra degrees on some hard paper.

Women force bahus to keep karwachauth vrath

Women force a widow to shave off her hair in few communities or wear white sarees,failing which females abuse her the most

If you notice,men don't even pay attention whether someone is keeping a vrath or not,unless provoked by a female of their family"Dekho jee,tumharee bahu khub manmaani karti hai.Humare customs nahi follow karna chahti"

This is a typical nature of a woman.The day she unites and makes heart to heart connections with other females,that will be the end of all troubles b/w women.

Husbands-They are afraid of being called a joru ka gulaam.Men are physically stronger but psychologically weaker than women.So they either become a mama's boy or joru ka gulaam.They dont have any independent identity,where they can think independently,accept that the stronger female of their house play mind games and thus protect the weaker female who's getting tormented,and who's incapable of playing such games.

This is 1 reason why today's GENUINE men are in a pathetic condition now..

not all mil's are like that. 

In your school and college life also you must have seen cat fights b/w girls,where one girl is taunting,bullying,or constantly making fun of the other female who seems weaker.Men usually don't engage in such stupid bullying pursuits.This is 1 quality I appreciate in men.

males also engage in these kind of things, maybe you are not aware because different elements play in males bullying pursuits.

women/girls are like that because they are given more freedom and importance in vanity area.

cant believe if a man can be so BAD.

Males usually forget an argument they have had,unless it culminated into a physical fight.

Usually men make fun out of fun,which is acceptable to his friend also who may be liking it.In other words they like this "masti" which is usually for time pass,leg pulling and fun.

But I am talking mainly of females who make fun,taunt,comment other females because she disagreed over something,her dress is not so hep,her English is not so good,her hairstyle is funny,or she is too shy type.

Their favourite TP for such females is either direct bullying or else back stabbing.S

ame habit is carried on when they become mother inlaws or sister in;aws.

If females are so generous,why do women on LCI complain the maximum about their MILs,sis-in-laws etc?

There hardly any complaints against the father inlaws and brother inlaws.And if they are complained against,it's also stated that these men act in provocation by MILs and SILs.

Just observe this

the whole story framed to defame the SIFF.

i have doubt about your (the author) real identification and intention.

in one side you telling your mother in law is a vamp and on ther side you attack the siff.

these clear your stand and truthfulness of the story.