Staying Separately - Next SteP?

Mine was a love marriage.  I am from AP and she is from Kerala.  We stayed in US until 2010.  Before marriage I have mentioned to my wife about me wanting to settle in Hyderabad, AP and she agreed to it. 

During these years of marriage, we had fights, arguments but we use to make up.
She is lazy about things like keeping house clean, etc. And I am little possesive and she is talkative persson I explained her lot oftimes about where to stop talking with people etc. 

In Oct 2009, Brother died in a car accident that day I decided to move back to India soon.  And she was not interested moving back, if moved she wants to move back to some other place not hyderabad.  We had lot of fights and during that I used some words which she says that hurt her a lot. 

In April 2010, she lost her job in US and so she said she wants some time off.  And moved to Parents House (Chennai)with kids.  I called lot of times to talk about her coming to Hyderabad,  during that time also we had fights but at last she agreed to come  only on DEC 15th permanently.

I flied back to hyderabad on 15th OCT 2010, she came for 1 week and left.  Once in two weeks she use to come and on DEC 17th 2010 she moved to Hyderabad. 

But, she was doing anything at home other than her work and feeding kids. 

Even when talking with me she was like just to the point. Not interested in Physical.  We still had arguments about different things.  She wanted to goto her parents every month and I agreed for that also. 

But I lost my patience about her not treating with respect, talking with me properly, not loving me so that we had big fight in APR 2011 and she left without kids because I wanted to keep kids for sometime as they were away from me for last 1 year.
Kids 4 years and 2 years.  I have took admission for my son here in Hyderabad(APR 2011) also.

Then she called me and said will goto counselling.  I flied to Chennai and attended first counselling with her and explained that we better stay together only if she is interested and wants to stay in Hyderabad.

After that Counselling she calls and says you come to Chennai and stay here.  I didn't agree then she said stay one year in Chennai and if everything looks find we will move to Hyderabad

I agreed to that but now she stays let us stay in Bangalore.  I dont want to leave Hyderabad because I want to stay her first thing,  And Mom is alone.

Now she stays she can't come this year next year she will think.

I dont know what to do now.   I asked her let us go for mutual divorce, for that she says it is ok with me, she doesn't want to stop my life.   But she will not do anything.