Need Guidance
Hi, Mahesh from Bangalore. Marriage took place in November 14. Issue is that, I stay with our parents. she always wanted independent life, she stayed with me for 3 months after marriage. Once pregnancy was confirmed, she left to her parents house. Almost from 3 yrs she is in her parents house.
While staying with me, she attempted suicide twice, before 3 yrs.
Now after convincing her, we brought her home again in November, but again attempted suicide by consuming sleeping pills. She wanted independent life(staying separate with my parents). But I was opposing this, bcoz I was elder son in my family. And need to look after them, as they are nearing 70 years. Even my parents didn't agree for staying far from them. She was angry on them also.
She started quarrelling for small things, when she came back in November. She came to our house on Thursday, on Sunday morning, she started shouting to all, when I told to be silent, she went out of home n started to call neighbours saying, we are beating her. After sometime, she ran outside saying, she will go to police n complain. We made her sit in home. After few minutes, she went to room to sleep. Evening we found that, she had taken sleeping pills n admitted to nearby hospital. While in hospital, she was telling her family members that, myself and my family should be in police station at any cost. She wanted to see we being locked up in the station. After speaking to her family members we sent her back to parents house from the hospital itself.
She and her family members told us that, she is suffering from Depression n did all bcoz of this, she's also taking treatment for this.
Now again her family members are pressuring to take her back to our house. But we are telling them that, we'll go legally and go according to what law says. As we are afraid that, when she comes again home, we'll be in danger, as she will find a way to put us in danger.
We had also asked for divoce, as nothing is going well between both of us. But everything is going in vain.
They are not ready to go court. They are telling us, that we'll sort this by talking. As many as, 6-8 times we have sat before for talking on this matter from the past 3yrs , involving elders from both the families. Everytime there will be a compromise on us, to take her back to home, But now, we are insisting to go legally, whereas they are insisting for talks.
Once again we took her back home after an assurance from her family members that, she'll be good. And also, we made her mother to stay with us for few days, so that she won't take any wrong steps. She stayed with us for a month, in this one month, she quarrelled for few petty issues. Bcoz of the presence of her mom, it didn't work out. She quarrelled with me n my family members, since we didn't want any issues in home, we kept quiet. Her mother also couldn't help in this, even she kept quiet.
She again went back to her native last week for festival. After going from here. She has again started complaining against us, saying we are not taking care. Her mother also, silent now. Her family members are saying that, we are responsible for all this. We don't know what to do now. From 6 months, Her brother calls me and threatens saying, he'll go to police and teach me a lesson. I told him, to do whatever is right according to him and I'll face the consequences, as I didn't do any mistakes.
In this 6 months, he has told me nearly 6 to 8 times that, he'll go to police. But finally, without going there, he has sent his sister again to our house. She's not obeying to anyone in our house, she's abusing our family members and shouts in a big tone. When told to be quite, she says that, she's like that itself. she can't change for ourselves. She's asking for household authority. So that, she'll lead the house. We told to be a good daughter in law to our house, so that everything will come in search of her, once she's good. But she's not listening, and tells she knows how to take it.
kindly guide on this.
Mr.Mahesh,
First thing to do is keep calm and record all the conversation,if possible video. most likely she will go to police and file all teh false cases on you and your family. but dont worry
keep all the mediation records, record all teh coversation, phone, video ,whatsapp etc etc . they all will save you and your family one day.
your eyes and ears must become recording devices.
Good luck
Vinay.
