Respected LCI Members. First of all aVery Big and Long Pending Thank You for all the support I got from this forum during my Divorce/Maintenance/Alimony Case. I sucessfully proved my innocence in the court of law with court granting me divorce without any alimony/maintenance and warned my wife for perjury. After which I thought all my woes were over. BUT ALAS, The respite was short lived. Now I have more problem financially from my own parents.
I am a defence officer and only son of my parents with two elder sisters. I got a job in 2000 (Age 16) and have been on posings since then taking care of my own expanses. My father is in a private job and has always been in a habit of blowing up money. Stating it's his money so he will do what he wishes. In 2007, He left job, invested all his savings in Shares and lost all of it. I started supporting him financially with whatever little i could ( which was never enough for him, he even asked money from me on false pretences and blew it away for his fun and friends). Mother has always been supporting him silently. He had a house which they had to leave due to fights with neighbours and started staying in a rented house. IN 2010, They found an arranged match for me (with whom I'm divorced now). But when it came to marriage expanses, he said he wants to host a grand wedding (to show off) and since I'm not taking dowry (which he wanted), I should pay for my marriage taking a personal loan. When I refused, he sold his house ( 20 lakh, of which only 3-4 lakh put in my marriage.. GRAND..!! and I took a house loan of Rs 20 lakh in which he added Rs 5 lakh, Rest of his money vanished). The house is in my name for which I gave him a General Power of Attorney. After wthat he again started his job however I got burdened with Marriage expanses and a fat EMI, While he started wasting his salary again. This continued till 2012 at which my divorce proceedings started. At lawyers advice, to reduce my income, I purchased another house jointly with mother on loan (House and Loan primary Mother, Entire EMI paid by me, So my salary on paper was 70000 but Rs 20000 after 50000 EMI. That house was put on rent by my parents, Rs 10000, which I requested them to send me to help with my living expenditure and court case. However they never sent me that rent and kept saying if I need money i should ask them ( Which no self respecting son would). Also they rented half of my first house as PG (Even my bedroom) and kept collecting rent for it. So I somehow fought the case pennyless and came out of it successfully. Now at present,
1. My father gets Rs 30000 as salary + Rs 15000 as total rent. ( Parents age 65 and 63), Drives a Car purchased by me. Gets Free medical and canteen benefits because of my job ( actually illegal now since he's no longer my dependant after restarting job), and has resorted to blowing up all the money again, refusing to give me any of the rent, saying I'm his son, It's my duty to give him money not take from him. I'm left with Rs 20000 which is impossible to maintain the mandatory lifestyle of an officer of my seniority ( My 08 year juniors drive Rs 15 Lakh cars, I use 11 year old bike, can't afford even a dinner in their group, and am ridiculed as a miser among all). ON TOP OF H\THIS HE HAS BEEN SAYING TO ALL THT IN PAST 11 YEARS I'VE NEVER TOOK CARE OF HIM FINANCIALLY AND EVEN NOW DONT GIVE HIM A SINGLE PENNY. HE IS FREE TO BLOW HIS SALARY. AND IT'S HIS RIGHT TO KEEP RENT AS MY CONTRIBUTION AS A SON TO PARENTS (AND ALSO SINCE HE SOLD HIS HOUSE FOR MY MARRIAGE AND GAVE MONEY IN PURCHASING THE FIRST HOUSE). When I came to know of all his statements I told my sister's and jijaji, cousins, relatives of my plight who went to talk to him, but he refused to listen and said He doesn't take my money, I should not ask what he does with his (They don't eat well telling the world they can't survive because I DON'T SEND MONEY)
P.S. He has a land worth Rs 50 Lakh which even if i mention, starts abusing me of eyeing it. And says it's his old age security. he'll never sell it to repaly the loans or to even take care of his own expanses through a FD.
2. I have decided to now clear things and take control of my finances atleast without being disrespectful to him and still fulfil my duty to them in a justified manner. I am going to talk to him and give him the under options in the same sequence.
a) Give me account of all his earnings in past 5 years ( since my marriage) and if he can justify the expenditure (Rs 45,000 p.m. or more) I'll continue to suffer for their need. (MOST UNLIKELY, HE'S NEVER SHARED HIS INCOME/EXP WITH ANYONE)
b) Tell him sternly to send me the rent of my second house atleast. In case of refusal I'll direct the tenant to send me the rent directly or vacate the house. QUESTION - SINCE THE HOUSE FIRST OWNER IS MY MOTHER, AND RENT AGREEMENT IS ALSO ON HER NAME, CAN HE/SHE TAKE OVER THE HOUSE.(LOAN 20 LAKH + MY PF MONEY 10 LAKH). IF HE SAYS SHE WILL, I PLAN TO STOP PAYING THE EMI OF THAT HOUSE TILL BANK EVICTS THE TENANT, AND REPOSESS IT BY PAYING IT LATER. BUT IF SHE CLAIMS THE HOUSE AS HER, AND I DON'T PAY EMI, I BECOME A DEFAULTER AND ALSO CHANCE OF LOOSING MY OWN RS 10 LAKH INVESTMENT IN CASE OF BANK POSESSION. WHAT IS THE OPTION OF RECLAIMING THE HOUSE ONLY ON MY NAME NOW??
c) Make entire family sit, and explain to my Dad how I've been indirectly contributing to his comfort (Car EMI which he drives, 25000 EMI of the house he stays, Medical and Canteen Rs 10000 because of my sweat and blood) and thus he has no right to blow his salary on fulfilling his desires( More at 65 than me at 33). And if I stop above contribution, He'll have no where to go only on his salary which he KEEPS BOASTING THAT HE SURVIVES ONLY ON THAT TOTALLY. In this case QUESTION- IF HE REFUSES, CAN I ASK HIM TO EVICT THE HOUSE (POWER OF ATTORNEY IS IN HIS NAME WHICH HE KEEPS HIDDEN FROM ME( CAN I REVOKE IT WITHOUT KNOWING THE POA DATE AND REG NO??), ALSO CLAIMS TO EVERYONE HOUSE IS HALF HIS AS HE GAVE MONEY {RS 5 LAKH AND ME RS20 LAKH}. SO I CAN EXPLAIN TO HIM AND RELATIVES HOW HE HAS RECOVERED HIS CONTRIBUTION ALREADY ( 1st rent 5000x48=2,40,000, Car EMI by me Rs 2,00,000, 2nd hOUSE RENT 10000X25= 2,50,000 and his own rent saving 15,000 (of him staying free)x 48=7,20,000 TOTAL Rs 14,30,000 ). WITH THIS OPTION IF HE LEAVES JOB I'M READY TO KEEP THEM WITH ME AND GIVE THEM EQUAL COMFORT AS I LIVE IN (MUCH LESS THEN HE DOES ON HIS OWN BLOWING UP MONEY) AND EVEN GIVE THEM REASONABLE ( FOR 65 AND 63 YR OLD COUPLE) MONTHLY EXPANSE. IF HE REFUSES TO STAY, HE'S FREE TO SELL HIS LAND AND USE THAT MONEY TO SUSTAIN HIMSELF ( I DON'T WANT EVEN A PENNY OF IT).
d) MOST SCARY, IF HE REFUSES TO LISTEN TO ALL LOGIC, USES POWER OF ATTORNEY TO SELL FIRST HOUSE, USES MY MOTHER BEING PRIMARY OWNER OF SECOND HOUSE TO SELL THAT AND KEEPS ALL MONEY ( RS 50 LAKH PLUS EVEN IF HE REPAYS LOAN TO FREE THE PAPERS) AND THEN BREAKS OF ALL CONTACT WITH ME. MY ENTIRE SAIVINGS AND FUTURE IS DOWN THE DRAIN.
e) I'll have to think of starting my own life again which I can not even imagine ith this financial nightmare. And can't even support a family with Rs 20,000 as of now maintaining the bare minimum standards required of an officer.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE HELP ME FIND THE RIGHT WAY, EITHER THROUGH FAMILY MEDIATION OR LEGALLY.
