Originally posted by : S K SINHA |
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Dear Madam/Sir,
My daughter married for 6 years had howrrowing expereinec as her hsband pushed her out of house at least 10-12 times. Everytime, we compromised. My daughter is earning regular salary of Rs 1 Lakh per month. Last year in Oct while she was pregnant, he pestered her for abortion and threatened with violence. For her safety i brought her with me . Her husband shouted take her away,i dont want to see her face.We thought it all over. He has always been abusive.From Oct 2016 to March 2017, her husband did not ever contact her. Mid March 2017 he contacted her and assured all help in delivery. We accepted ounder belief that after delivery things may improve.In March she gave birth to a baby son .In Oct this year, her husband left home after a fight and has not come back. He too is earning Rs 1.00 lakh per month.
1. He sends her messages that he wants to meet baby child. My daughter gets deeply disturbed whenever he comes to see the child. He has already threatened that he may run away with the child. So my daughter does not want him to touch the child. Can my daughter refuse him opportunity to meet the child? During last 2 months he has met child on 3 occassions at my home for half an hour each time.
2.Can my daughter get any maintenance for the child. We too are sick of their fights, kicking out of homes, midnight calls, violence, insults to us etc.
I need some guidelines .
Thanking all learned in anticiption.
S K Sinha
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Mr Vijay has sweetly put in words his experience. Things wont be that rosy and cosy the way he has described.
I will explain your situation from now on. Nobody will be peaceful for the rest of their lives, especially you your wife, your daughter, the kid. Don’t know about the husband. But there will be custody cases which will run till child turns 18. There will be maintenance case for child till age of 18. If father does not pay, nothing much can be done. Divorce case will be there. She could adjust with him in bed, but not outside of the bed why? My guess is she is immature and you are responsible for it. Till there is someone to listen they will keep complaining, children have to be left independent to make choices, learn from mistakes and then lead their own life. You are too much interfering with your daughters life has brought situation till here. Anyway you seem to be quite strong, now what you need is one auto, all three of you go to court and stand along with the child.
My advice to you and your daughter and your wife is, let your daughter be with the husband, let her manage her show. The more you intervene, the more things will be worse. If marrying, spreading legs and getting pregnant was the only idea behind marriage, then marriage was waste of time and money more over waste or precious energy. Atleast you would have been peaceful if you had not gotten her married. Getting sperm would have been best approach if having child was the only intention. Let her speak to her husband and move along with him. The more you support her, the more you guys will feed a lawyers family. The child will curse all of you some day, or might even end up killing one of you or all of you for spoiling its life.
Marriage = adjustment.