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Shradha (self employed)     09 May 2011

What should i do ?

i got married last may '10, and since then my husband has been abusing me mentally, physically and verbally.  according to a counsellor he is a patient of bi-polar disorder or paranoid schrezophinia. though i dont have any certificates to prove this. His parents know about his condition and how he treats me. last 3 months i am staying with my parents. plz suggest if i should contest or have a mutual divorce though i want a security for my future but they are very powerful socially and financially.

In dire need of help..... please help.



Learning

 4 Replies

kumar (NIL)     09 May 2011

Dear shradha,

You cann't get divorce as you got married 3 months back only. What you wanna do is,  record each and everything what ever is going to happend with you from your husband and after that you can go for a legal action against your husband and his parents.

But before going any legal action, just talk to his parents and your parents too once regarding this issue and try to solve the problems. I suggest you to take your husband for a better counselling to change his mind set. If still the same is happening after doing this also, then i defntly suggest you to go for legal action against all of them.

Think once before wht you doing? But be in a positive way, i hope you will be happy with your family forever.

Thank You.,.,.,

 

 

1 Like

Shradha (self employed)     10 May 2011

i got married last may, it means it is going to be a year.. and right now i am with my parents and not inlaws....

i agree with you but my in laws are not interested in me going back to the house cause they knew it would happen some day cz of their son.

my inlaws are those of small sense and thinking  they think that i am trying to prove that there son is mad...

Jamai Of Law (propra)     10 May 2011

Don't feel enticed about getting 'some compensation damages' vide which you may want to 'secure' your future.

 

 

These entitlements are previleges and not right de facto!!

 

 

In reality, the exercise of winning some compensation for damages also makes additional damages in due course!!!

What about those additional damages?

 

 

So resolve it amicably if possible, unless other party has done something in-human and atrocious thing to you and to which you feel that it is not condonable at all and they be brought to justice whatsoever it may take and collateral damage!!!

 

But 'broadness of your mind' as above, should not also become your weakness and other party becomes shamelss to take it for granted.

Retaliation is not a violence (So don't be grappled with over consciousness on non-violence or ahinsa. Ahinsa doesn't say 'don't retaliate to other's misdeeds'. )

 

 

Take a call and wait for some time and do not make any thoughtless moves to deteriorate the situation further. Maintain your composure and calm is the main thing here.

 

 

If you were assured of yourself that you were the wronged party and a genuine victim ....... You won't raise doubts. That's why you are askin questions and trying convince yourself to come to decision.

One thing is sure that no one can compel the other to cohabit. So be assured on that.

 

Then remains the question as to how to break apart.

 

 

Also .................whatever people advise, you would invariably infer the way you wish it to, the way you find it convenient. This is how you will foster you opinion (whether it is a right or wrong decision in reality. Even criminals finds some excuse to convince themselves and their inner conscience  and only then they commit crime!!!  ...................... Same is true for good acts also ............ Whether society opposes/scare them or not ........................... they just go ahead and pursue that good cause !!).

 

 

For each decision there something to gain and something to lose.

 

 

 

If you ask opinion, every person who has iterests in it, would give you a opinion based on their own interests!!!

 

whos' that every person? (it includes parents, relatives, friends, inlaw, spouse, neighbors, councellors, lawyers ) each has one or the other kind of interest to be benefited from you at your your cost.

 

 

Take Example of parents and relative:

They also want to safeguard their image in public!! So they would try to protect that also. Here they don't have commercial interest but atleast social interests!! ....................................'chhoti ki shaadi bhi to honi hai!  ..........  biradariwale kya kahenge' etc.

 

 

Brother: 'paraya dhan wapa ghar mein!' ......... 'baap ki sampatti me hissedar aaa gaya!' (Brother may hate the come back of his married-sister) ......................... Many permutations on either directions!!! .........................................'I would teach a lesson to my brother-in-law for the sake of my sister's tragedy ........ I love my sister the most!!'

 

 

How a lawyer would look at your case? ............ (Please Don't ask me to answer it!! :))

 

1 Like

stylistperson (Director)     14 May 2011

DO YOU WANT TO LIVE WITH YOUR HUSBAND? IF THEY DO NOT WANT YOU THEN WHY DO YOU WANT TO LIVE?

 

IF MUTUAL DIVORCE POSSIBLE, MAY SAVE SOME TIME AND HEADACHE. YOU CAN QUICKLY GET INTO TRACK WITH NEW LIFE. IF YOU GO WITH LEGAL FIGHT, THE LIFE WILL BE STRESSFUL AND MAY SPOIL.

 

IF YOU CAN STRONG ENOUGH TO STAND ALONE BY SELF AT HARD TIME FOR SOMETIME, TAKE MUTUAL DIVORCE THEN START PLANNING NEW LIFE. IF YOU THINK THEY DONT WANT YOU SO GO WITH SOME RESPECTFUL COMMON RELATIVES TO FIND OUT IF ANY HOPE THERE. IF NO HOPE THEN TAKE BOLD DECISION BY SELF WITHOUT THINKING OF SOCIETY.

YOU ARE NOT WALKED TOO FAR AT WRONG WAY, IF YOU CAN TAKE U TURN NOW, WILL BE BETTER FOR YOUR FUTURE LIFE BY GETTING RIGHT WAY QUICKER.

 


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