Want to live as friend with unmarried women
Querist :
Anonymous
(Querist) 27 October 2017
This query is : Resolved
Respected lawyers, my age is 53 years , central govt servant , and my wife state govt servant , daughter post graduate and working , son in 12 std and learning , i am under depression treatment since 7 years due to my arrogant and , selfish wife , i feel strongly that in my older age she will not accompany me . i feel jointly we should go for divorce however she is not ready . in india divorce take lot of time and i am 53 years old therefore can i live just as friend with unmarried women .
kindly guide
Guest
(Expert) 27 October 2017
Not advisable before divorce.
Querist :
Anonymous
(Querist) 27 October 2017
instead of living with arrogant wife at age 53 , or waiting for divorce for years , why cant i stay as friend with other unmarried women for piece of mind
Guest
(Expert) 28 October 2017
Mr. Jigyasu's advice would have been better for you to be adhered to.
If not possible, your friendship (friendly living with other woman) may have a heavy cost for you. You will have to be prepared to part with your substantial income as maintenance charges for your wife on divorce likely to be filed by her on the ground of your adultery with other woman.
Besides, your depression may get worsened on legal recourse adopted by your wife with waste of your money and time resulting in to loss of peace of mind also.
Best of luck.
Guest
(Expert) 28 October 2017
I am obliged to see that Mr. Dhingra has endorsed my views.
Vijay Raj Mahajan
(Expert) 28 October 2017
Its your life do as you wish, but let me inform you that being a central government employee, Central Government Service Rule applies to you where your indulging in adulterous relationship even without indulging in bigamy is against the service rules as it gives wrong impression about your moral character that will be noted in your service records if your wife makes a complaint against you to your department.
Rest you understand implication of indulging in adulterous relationship can lead to dissolution of marriage as well it will amount to act of cruelty towards your wife that can give her right to seek legal relief against you under the Protection of the woman from the domestic violence Act, etc.
Querist :
Anonymous
(Querist) 28 October 2017
Thank you very much to both lawyers , as i have lived with medicines since 7 years , i may have to live further no way , i am unfortunate individual , but looking at current data of husbands in susidel mode , no of depressed , i hope that this august forum will do some thing for husbands , further this is one of the major cause of Indian happiness index at 144 rank , we need to study norvey s family laws .
Guest
(Expert) 28 October 2017
Shri Vijay Raj Mahajan has cautioned you correctly about consequence of your proposed adulterous life on your service. I may add that you can be dismissed from service on the charge of moral turpitude due to your illicit relations.
So far happiness index of 144 rank, as you pointed out, that is concerned that is in general and is arrived at by application of various criteria of life of general public, NOT merely the individual relationship between husband and wife. Husband and wife relationship depends upon mutual adjustments and trust, not one sided.
Guest
(Expert) 28 October 2017
Shri Vijay Raj Mahajan has cautioned you correctly about consequence of your proposed adulterous life on your service. I may add that you can be dismissed from service on the charge of moral turpitude due to your illicit relations.
So far happiness index of 144 rank, as you pointed out, that is concerned that is in general and is arrived at by application of various criteria of life of general public, NOT merely the individual relationship between husband and wife. Husband and wife relationship depends upon mutual adjustments and trust, not one sided.
Guest
(Expert) 28 October 2017
Shri Vijay Raj Mahajan has cautioned you correctly about consequence of your proposed adulterous life on your service. I may add that you can be dismissed from service on the charge of moral turpitude due to your illicit relations.
So far happiness index of 144 rank, as you pointed out, that is concerned that is in general and is arrived at by application of various criteria of life of general public, NOT merely the individual relationship between husband and wife. Husband and wife relationship depends upon mutual adjustments and trust, not one sided.
Guest
(Expert) 28 October 2017
Sorry for repeated post due to internet slowdown problem.
P. Venu
(Expert) 28 October 2017
There is no illegality, but you are pursuing happiness and comfort that is immoral. Please note that sexual relationship is a responsibility, not pursuit of pleasure. As such, future may turn out to be cumbersome.
However, the arrangement need not affect your service, in the normal course.
Rajendra K Goyal
(Expert) 28 October 2017
No advice from me to an author who is anonymous.
You can post the query in fresh thread with your identity and material facts.
Guest
(Expert) 28 October 2017
Querist/Author Excuse. RK Goyal please as a Child you should not involve your self in such query and better concentrate on your home work please.
Guest
(Expert) 28 October 2017
Querist/Author your title of the query and query clearly confirms your intention of flattering with " Unmarried Women" and doesn't justify and certainly no doubt you would reap the consequences.
Guest
(Expert) 28 October 2017
Querist/author certainly the Parents and family people and well wishers of those " Unmarried women " will not tolerate your behavior and would certainly take you in to task.
Guest
(Expert) 28 October 2017
Querist If you wish your children to live with good character first you have to set them an example.
Guest
(Expert) 28 October 2017
Querist If you wish your children to live with good character first you have to set them an good example.
Guest
(Expert) 28 October 2017
Again childish post by Mr. Rajendra K Goyal, when no specific request has been made to him by the querist to advice. If he did not want to advice, what prompted him to make a vague post, except to play a number game by him?
Guest
(Expert) 29 October 2017
@Mr. Surender Kumar,
Unsolicited and unwelcome mediator seems to have appeared on the scene!
The expert, Mr. Surender Kumar should better have offered mediation to the querist and his wife to at least give solace and hope for some comfort to the querist. If that was beyond his capacity and capability, at least he should have suggested some solution at this thread for the benefit of the querist.
Querist :
Anonymous
(Querist) 29 October 2017
I thank all experts from my heart , i am doing meditation , i have not yet selected any unmarried women as cited , i am 53 years old and at least post VRS / Retirement i can leave family and run to some senior living , which is not far away , i thank an i will surely speak to dhingra sir if things gets worsened , i have all super valid proofs against my wife , i promise RK Goyal sir to come this forum with name at appropriate time , Thanks to this website and all experts once again.
Guest
(Expert) 29 October 2017
Welcome please and your personal character in life is more important atleast for the well being of your children.take care.
Guest
(Expert) 29 October 2017
Well thought by you. It would be better for you to live in some old age home after retirement, rather than getting your image maligned without any reason or rhyme, when your wife is not cooperating with you. VRS may be better, as you are likely to get full pension supposedly having full qualifying service added with the additional years to qualifying service, as per the rules.
In the meanwhile, in your service record if you have nominated your wife for PF, gratuity and other terminal benefits, insurance policy or Savings bank/FD, etc., you may change your nomination in some of your favourite person, so that at least she may not get benefited in any even.
Try to live happily for the rest of life without association of your wife. Sometimes, a person has to compromise his position under some compelling circumstances.
Guest
(Expert) 29 October 2017
Author/Querist though the Child had got some Anonymous name the Child it self is an anonymous with no profile/detail. So you need not worry about the child-obviously baby RK Goyal
P. Venu
(Expert) 29 October 2017
I may be permitted to point out that the suggestions of Learned Shri Expert Dhingra are inconsistent with the rules, as applicable of Central Government servants. At present, there is no case of full qualifying service. A Central Government servant, after 20 years of service is entitled for full pension i.e at he rate of half the pay. Again no nomination can divest the wife/husband of legitimate dues in the eventuality of her/his spouse while in service.
Guest
(Expert) 29 October 2017
Mr. P. Venu,
You are permitted to point out anything you like. Bit, with due respect, if participated in the thread, I wished you would have rendered valuable advice to the querist. But treating my suggestion as inconsistent, without pinpointing any specific inconsistency, does not seem to make any sense.
Contrarily about your own post, I would request you to recheck whether there lies or not any inconsistency in your own advice, particularly, where you have stated, "A Central Government servant, after 20 years of service is entitled for full pension i.e., at the rate of half the pay." The position does not seem to be correct. However, if sure about this position, you may please like to quote some specific rule or order of the Government of India in support of your statement. To me,
You have also stated, "there is no case of full qualifying service." On one hand, you have stated, "A Central Government servant, after 20 years of service is entitled for full pension i.e., at the rate of half the pay," but on the other hand, you have stated “there is no case of full qualifying service.” Please recheck and revert back, as per your knowledge, which position is correct?
Further, you have stated, "no nomination can divest the wife/husband of legitimate dues in the eventuality of her/his spouse while in service." Please recheck, if there exists any provision for nomination for the purpose of pension/ family pension. As per my knowledge, there is no provision for nomination for family pension. So he may or may not make any nomination, that will have no relevance. So, where the question of nomination for pension arises? You may also like to pinpoint, if I have even mistakenly mentioned the term "pension" anywhere in my post for the purpose of nomination. But, irrespective of wife being eligible for family pension, who knows whether she would survive the querist or not to enjoy the family pension benefit. Only time can tell.
Rajendra K Goyal
(Expert) 29 October 2017
It would be better if the expert would have posted / contributed for the thread rather to go on posting just to satisfy his ego / irritation / frustration.
Rajendra K Goyal
(Expert) 29 October 2017
Some experts are very serious to increase no. of posts through vague / unwarranted / irrelevant posts.
A good method to increase replies without having legal knowledge.
Guest
(Expert) 30 October 2017
The Child should go to school on time . " try to be sober' the child should understand the meaning of such words before using it. many children are becoming addicts due to the negligence of parents.
Dr J C Vashista
(Expert) 31 October 2017
Consult a local lawyer, I prefer to remain silent for an anonymous author.
