Problem creating from wife and her family from past 6 years
Manish Jha
(Querist) 12 June 2012
This query is : Resolved
Hi,
I am 9 years married having 2 kids 8 yrs and 4 yrs.
My wife is of abusive and angry nature and such poisionous nature that after the marriage wanted to spoil my house and family.
She never wanted to live with my parents. Anyway she was staying with me in bangalore and after sometime started quarelling, figting due to this i had lost lot many high presurred it jobs. One day her parents and brother came in 2006 to my house and fought and compained dowry charges broken particulars and went from bangalore to Bihar.
After sometime her father putted her to my parents house in patna and made their life miserable as it became thretening spot for legal, police etc.
As my parents were peace loving tried to adjust but my mother became sick and the house situation made by her so dangerous that her medication couldn't went in peace manner and accidently she died with some other disease which she was not having just in 49 yrs of age.
After my mother's death she chrged on my father for sexual harassment to neighbours, family and surrounding to make him upset and not stay with her, me and my kids.
Now again after 3 yrs she had started same manner behaving which she was doing while her family came and fought with me in bangalore and charged false dowry.
She is abusing my father, brother , her wife and telling will kill her. even she is abusing my died mother.
Kindly suggest the solution as i am in bangalore and very much upset for what step i should do.
Regards,
Manish
Adv.R.P.Chugh
(Expert) 12 June 2012
Dear Manish,
1. Since a lot of litigation is pending, consult an advocate with the entire papers, because without that we can't really advise on how to defend yourself against those frivolous charges.
2. Secondly - she cannot as a matter of right stay there in Bihar at your parental place, her matrimonial home is in Bangalore where the two of you set up your hearth. Your father if he is the owner can seek eviction from the property.
Feel free to talk !
Shonee Kapoor
(Expert) 18 June 2012
In complete agreement with Ld. Bharat.
Regards,
Shonee Kapoor
harassed.by.498a@gmail.com
Manish Jha
(Querist) 03 July 2012
I consulted one lawyer and they told you should inform to nearest pol. st. and commissioner office but I don't want to put it in Pol. as they will start coming to my house and i may be told to vacate house by house owner as generally they don't like such things.
Kindly suggest the precaustion step what I can take in advance from law like filing some petition etc. I had went to civil court and made some Affifdavit but that is not of any important use.
Thanks in Advance.
Manish
Manish Jha
(Querist) 14 March 2013
Due to My wife's shouting and quareel and fighting with my yonger brother's wife and neighbours my owner told to leave the house.
In new house again after 2-3 months she started abusing, shouting and quarelling with me. she is abusing to my father, my died mother and brother and his wife. Her mother threatening me that she will quarrel at my village.
One day suddenly she went to police station and charged again rape to my father, dowry and physical relation with my yonger brother's wife. I submitted medical letter from psychiatrist which was giving medicine to her from past few months after that Police person told her for medical treatment in hospital but she and her mother on phone refused for that as she is fearing i will misuse it.
After this incident I am staying in some guesthouse after leaving home and her paying her maintainences as police person told.
Her mother is coming bangalore in few month and they are planning furtur police complain to make me arrest.
Kindly suggest me the solution as I work for a startup company in very hectic schedule.
Whether I should proceed for divorce?
Manish Jha
(Querist) 14 March 2013
Due to My wife's shouting and quareel and fighting with my yonger brother's wife and neighbours my owner told to leave the house.
In new house again after 2-3 months she started abusing, shouting and quarelling with me. she is abusing to my father, my died mother and brother and his wife. Her mother threatening me that she will quarrel at my village.
One day suddenly she went to police station and charged again rape to my father, dowry and physical relation with my yonger brother's wife. I submitted medical letter from psychiatrist which was giving medicine to her from past few months after that Police person told her for medical treatment in hospital but she and her mother on phone refused for that as she is fearing i will misuse it.
After this incident I am staying in some guesthouse after leaving home and her paying her maintainences as police person told.
Her mother is coming bangalore in few month and they are planning furtur police complain to make me arrest.
Kindly suggest me the solution as I work for a startup company in very hectic schedule.
Whether I should proceed for divorce?
Raj Kumar Makkad
(Expert) 14 March 2013
In the given circumstances, you have no other option but to proceed for divorce but if MCD is possible, explore that possibility.
Manish Jha
(Querist) 14 March 2013
Raj sir thanks.
What is MCD?
Manish Jha
(Querist) 14 March 2013
If MCD is mutual consense divorce then she will never be accepting that I am 100% sure. Her intension is to stay with me by fearing and making home condition miserable.
Manish Jha
(Querist) 14 March 2013
Psychiatrist who was medicating her has told me for her immediate hospitalization but she and her mother is refusing that. Even police station also tried to bring her to doctor but in front of that she started abusing my family and refused and police person and doctors are telling they cann't force her for medication as she can file case against her.
Guest
(Expert) 14 March 2013
Dear Manish,
Please don't mind, the problem can never be single-sided. The problems are created by reciprocal actions and reactions when the other side shows intolerance. Just check, if you are always taking the side of your parents or other family members by neglecting her altogether. Problems at first appear as psychological, but later on become psychic problems by constant repetition or depending upon the environments one lives in.
But, when a question of involvement of psychatrist comes to the fore, the concerned person thinks as if the opposite side is treating him/her as mad. Police cannot compel her to get check up from a psychiatrist without the orders of the magistrate.
In fact, both of you need to consult a psychologist, not the psychiatrist, who can just advise both of you how to behave with each other after understanding the problem by anaysing the state of mind of both of you. A psychiatrist normally gives treatment based on visible or stated symptoms, not by analysing the real background and causes of such symptoms.
Manish Jha
(Querist) 14 March 2013
Dhingra Sir,
Thanks for you reply.
Actually she repeats the incident in the interval of every 3 months. Till 3 months she will be very polite and well behaved.
You can think my mother when died in 2009 and during her final ritual only at my village she started shouting and abusing my father and family persons and whole village collected there and then the sarpanch told her to write an statement that she will be good mannered while living with me then only she can go with me at my working city. And just after 15 days at my Patna residence she charged Rape insultation to my father and he was forced to live his flat and live in some hotel.
Actually culprit is her mother who is illiterate and gunda type people in Katihar Bihar. My family is literate and all my brothers and father is doing gud job but her brothers are unemployed and doing nonsense things in katihar bihar.
Now you can think she is telling that I will make you loose your job but after that how our daughters and her maintainance will happen she is not even thinking for that. I am forced to leave rental houses in every 6 months due to her noise and shouting.
Kindly suggest.
Regards,
Manish
Manish Jha
(Querist) 14 March 2013
I had only thought that she should adjust with my father who is alone after my mother's death and if possible with my brothers.
But if my father will stay if only for few hour's in my house she will create a big issue. By being a son I am attached to my father and if he cann't stay in my house for few days how can I tolerate that. Ok. if she don't want to keep relation to my brother and his wife but she has to adjust with my father and she always started rape, dirty blames on him such that he should never visit my house and meet my childrens.
It's cruelty and lot of eneminess feeling of her towards my family members.
Regards,
Manish
Manish Jha
(Querist) 14 March 2013
-----------------------------------------------------
Guest
(Expert) 14 March 2013
Dear Manish,
Your own statement, "the sarpanch told her to write an statement that she will be good mannered while living with me then only she can go with me at my working city," speaks of some coercion by the Sarpanch putting an illegal condition that she would not go with you to live with you. A Sarpanch could not force her not to live with her husband. I suppose that condition would also have been impsed in the presence of one and all of the gatherings, adding injury to the insult of her ego.
If her mother is of gunda type, only yours as well as your family's love and affection can make her change her side from her mother to your family.
I have already advised for psychological (NOT psychiatric) treatment of both of you. Try to change the environments. Otherwise, if not possible, you may apply for divorce on the ground of cruelty, if she does not agree for mutual consent divorce.
Manish Jha
(Querist) 14 March 2013
I want divorce process related questions:
In mine case of divorce the whole process may go how many years?
And also, If I file divorce case then in a month how much time I have to appear in front of the court as currently I have high pressure start up company Job.
Regards,
Manish
