Victim of cruelty seeking remedy
Arijit Poddar
(Querist) 04 July 2013
This query is : Resolved
Hi, My Wife left my place on pretext of staying at her place for 7 days on 06/05/12 and then never I filed for RCR on 05/16/12 after end number of requests in person at her place and telephonic in form of calls and texts. Hence she deserted without any justifiable cause. When I visited her her place she refused to come along as she demanded to stay separate from my parents which is not possible as I am a lone child. I was abused and thrown out on not agreeing to their demands.
Against the RCR they filed a false case u/s 498A on 19/06/12. I was in custody for 14 days and recieved a bail and was able to get anticipatory for my parents from High Court.Lately she filed for maintainace u/s 125, order is still pending.
In the mean time I being associated with Anti-Corruption Committee was able to get her father suspended on the grounds mentioned in the attached file. I have every document pertaining to the allegations and currently waiting for the final decision from IOCL.
Now I also have a exparte decree for the RCR that I filed and my wife bluntly refused to obey court's order. I filed for the execution though I do not have a knowledge of any property in her name.
In the mean time I am being harassed physically and mentally by my inlaws and a few associates and friends of my wife. I have already informed Police, DM, Hon. Home secretary(Central & State). Also her recent activities demonstrate every form of cruelty and adultry to some extent.
1)What are the steps that need to taken now?
2)I have a 2.5 year old child, how do I claim custody? I havent seen my son for more thean a year.
3)Am I liable to pay maintainance where desertion is establised?
4)What do I do if she refuses after execution?
5)What steps do I need to take after I get an acquittal in 498A which I am sure I will. will I still be liable for paying maintainance? As I am not willing to pay a single dime.
6)Is there any medical test which can be done to prove that she is not involved in any kind of adultry?
ajay sethi
(Expert) 04 July 2013
if your wife has failed to comply with RCR decree then you can file for divorce .
as far as custody of child is concerned since your child is very young it is doubtful that court would award you custody . however you can get visitation rights .
you have not mentioned your wife qualifications and whether she is working or not .
a wife who deserts her husband without sufficent cause may not be entitled to maintenance .
if you get acquital in 498A case you can apply for divorce . filing of false 498A case amounts to cruelty
Arijit Poddar
(Querist) 04 July 2013
Well She left her studies after class 9 hence not even cleared her 10th.She may work as a freelancer beautician.
I have filed for execution as suggested by my lawyer just for the sake of the child although I do not have any knowledge of any property in her name.
If she refuses in front of the Ld. Court as the order is being executed do I need to prove adultry because it is quite difficult to prove adultry however her actions do demostrate the same which I have already informed my lawyer?
Will I have to face any problems in getting divorce?
Guest
(Expert) 04 July 2013
Mr. Arijit,
Is not there any contradiction in your statement when at first you stated, "never I filed for RCR on 05/16/12," and thereafter you have stated, "against the RCR they filed a false case u/s 498A on 19/06/12"? So, what is the actual position as against the two contradictory statements?
Further, frankly spaeaking, when on one hand you had intended to eat the livelihood of her father by getting her entangled in a corruption case and on the other you are trying to prove adultery against her, why should she like to live with you to make her life hell. Only your revengeful attitude seems to have hardened her attitude. RCR depends only upon restoration of mutual trust.
Chances seem to be dim for your reunity with your wife. Both of the parties seem to be destined to harassment from each other for a long time, if none of the party is ready for truce. Forget about custody of child in that case.
Frankly speaking, cruelty is not one-sided. Cruelty is caused and continued from both the sides. Both are victims of cruelty from one another.
Raj Kumar Makkad
(Expert) 04 July 2013
I do endorse the advice of Ld. Dhingra G.
Arijit Poddar
(Querist) 04 July 2013
well I meant to say that she never returned sorry I missed to enter the word "returned". Actually It is a nature or practice of her father to misuse the rights as he did the same in case of her younger sister where he squeezed a lum sum amount from his brother in law and then handed over his son against divorce. Apart from that her daughter eloped alone after she had a quarrel with her parents I was the one who saved her against which her father filed a case u/s 363 where my wife saved me in 164 and that is where a soft corner lies because the marriage was a result of a cordial relation and I never wanted divorce and tried to convince my wife regarding the same and I do have ample proof for the same but it is her her parents whose interference is creating a problem and they wnat a separate accommodation. I tried my level best to get things straightened but all my efforts were in vain I had no other option I was at the dead end where there was no other option but to fight back.
Raj Kumar Makkad
(Expert) 04 July 2013
It seems that you and your wife both love each other and want to lea married life with each other but there is outside interference. I shall suggest you to personally convince your wife to come out of the umbrella of her parents and strongly stand with you. all problems in that event shall vanish.
Arijit Poddar
(Querist) 04 July 2013
Well sir I tried my level best as still now even after all this I am still willing to stay with her it is just that I want this thing to end as it is effecting our life (both of us)and finding no other option I may have to go for divorce but I will not do that willfully.
Raj Kumar Makkad
(Expert) 04 July 2013
Divorce is not solution to such problems rather problems start from this point. Who can anticipate about future would be. Better to make one more serious effort in this direction.
Arijit Poddar
(Querist) 04 July 2013
I would really appreciate if some one really finds me a way because at this point of time I am really worried about her as she is not much educated to support herself and also considering the future of the child it will be difficult for her to face the situations even if I get the custody still both the parents play equal role to bring up their word. Also it would not be that easy for her to cope up with the society. Considering all this she should understand but her parents won't let her do they are simply trying to blackmail me using my child as a bait.
Arijit Poddar
(Querist) 04 July 2013
I would really appreciate if some one really finds me a way because at this point of time I am really worried about her as she is not much educated to support herself and also considering the future of the child it will be difficult for her to face the situations even if I get the custody still both the parents play equal role to bring up their word. Also it would not be that easy for her to cope up with the society. Considering all this she should understand but her parents won't let her do they are simply trying to blackmail me using my child as a bait.
Arijit Poddar
(Querist) 04 July 2013
I would really appreciate if some one really finds me a way because at this point of time I am really worried about her as she is not much educated to support herself and also considering the future of the child it will be difficult for her to face the situations even if I get the custody still both the parents play equal role to bring up their word. Also it would not be that easy for her to cope up with the society. Considering all this she should understand but her parents won't let her do they are simply trying to blackmail me using my child as a bait.
Raj Kumar Makkad
(Expert) 04 July 2013
You have a bigger responsibility now if you understand the problems which both parties may face in future so try to settle the things.
Arijit Poddar
(Querist) 04 July 2013
I would be the first one if I get a chance and a situation to... But it is quite unfortunate that I am not getting any chance to make her understand and get her out of her imaginary world.
Raj Kumar Makkad
(Expert) 04 July 2013
You have adequately been advised and now this is your turn to follow it or not.
Guest
(Expert) 04 July 2013
Had you been worried about her, you would not have even remotely thought about making any allegation of adulteration on her. I can very well guess, you are worried about getting custody of the child. Unless her father is out of the mess of corruption case made by you, you cannot think about any compromise. Your other storry also reveals as if your case is not an isolated individual case but a mix up of other problems of interference in your in-laws lives.
Arijit Poddar
(Querist) 04 July 2013
Well yes as I already informed that her actions demonstrates so but it is hard for me to believe and thats where I am against divorce.
If I get a chance I would be the first one to get this thing settled and as far as the charges against her dad on grounds of corruption yes as a member of the anti-corruption committee I am bound to do what I have done and even it was my dad I wouldn't have spared but here the case is completely different as I stated earlier.
Mr. Makkad I really appreciate and respect your advise and would definitely make a serious effort to settle the matter if I do really get a chance to do so.
Arijit Poddar
(Querist) 04 July 2013
Also regarding the trying to frame the charges on grounds of adultry Mr. Dhingra you are quite experienced and you know how cases work out and you need ample grounds to alledge the opponent and defend yourself hence I would never like to accuse her if I have to on false grounds and hence I am trying to find out a fair way. And do you think they are not going to accuse me in every possible way who have already filed a false case u/s 498A? You are thinking from the point of view of my wife about the loss that they have suffered which I did after suffering a lot for what they had been doing repeatedly and not only with me but with others as well.
Raj Kumar Makkad
(Expert) 04 July 2013
In war and love everything is possible so you both accused each other during war and now don't anything unturned in love game.
Arijit Poddar
(Querist) 04 July 2013
Sir an honest confession I still love her but after all the efforts to bring her back are in vain now only thing is a sudden blow can change every thing which can have both negetive and positive effect it is all upto her .
But Yes I will definitely make a serious effort to bring her back by convincing her at every possible chance that I get.
Arijit Poddar
(Querist) 04 July 2013
And regarding the childs custody I clearly mentioned that Both father and mother plays equal role to bring up their word. Hence what is to be done as neither I nor the court can force her to live with me and that does not mean that I would stay away from my word.
Arijit Poddar
(Querist) 05 July 2013
Sir I really appreciate you all for your time and effort. Please donot take anything personally it was all a part of the conversation. Will get back soon Good Night.
Thanks & Regards to All
V R SHROFF
(Expert) 05 July 2013
Pl clarify the dates:: "06/05/12 and then never I filed for RCR on 05/16/12 after "
confusing !!
Guest
(Expert) 05 July 2013
Dear Arijit,
You are always welcome. We don't take personally any personal case of a querist. Almost all of us express our impartial and unbiased opinion without any prejudice. About me, neither you nor your wife is even remotely related to me or known even slightly. So, the question of taking anything personally does not arise. However, I know that my straightforwardness would definitely have pinched you. In fact, my effort is alwways not to keep anyone in dark. or give camouflaged and wrong advice.
Always, false cases infuriate the opposite party and he also tries to emotionally adopt the same false and fake grounds to hurt the other party, instead of defending the case on merits, which makes the matter much more comlicated. In fact, instead of adopting harmful and false tactics, your merit based defence should have been so strong for the 498A case that your wife should have become ashamed of her father's advice. But you preferred to adopt only a very revengeful attitude by trapping her father even in a corruption case and tried to make her father lose his job. So, how you can expect sympathy of a woman towards her husband, whose husband becomes instrumental to make her father's family die of hunger by losing his job.
You may be victim of cruelty, but you may not be aware of how much your wife would also have been victim of cruelty from your side. If any 498A case is wrong, the judge himself becomes aware of that by the sequence of events and becomes automatically sympathetic towards a person who actually is made victim of cruelty, provided the concerned advocate presents the case effectively.
