Divorce

girish (Querist) 16 November 2013 This query is : Resolved
i am 40plus and had love marriage with a girl 10 yrs younger then me. she loved me a lot before marriage. but after marriage just after 3 motnhs she started quarreling with me and all my family memebsr without any reason. she left home 3 months back and now her family members keeps calling us to meet them and take her back. we met them few times but they kept fighting and quarelling with us. now they want us to meet them at their residence. we are raelly confused whther we shud meet them at their residence or not. my wife ahs ruined my name in my family and relatives and am living under lots of stress since then.still she is abusing me and my family membesr to everyone she meets and all the people conncted with us. can we lodge a n.c before going at their residence or shall we approach a lawyer first? i want to divorce her for sure now. she is working and eraning well, so do i have to give her alimony or not?our marraige is just 6 months old and have no child. i also suspect her i am not sure but has a doubt that she is in relations with her sister in law even before our marraige.pls guide me urgently sir?

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ABDUL RAZIQUE (Expert) 16 November 2013
FOR DIVORCE YOU MAY WAIT FOR ANOTHER SIX MONTH BUT IF YOU WANT TO JUDICIAL SEPARATION THAN YOU CAN FILE TO SHOW HER CRUELTY AND HOPE YOU CAN GET CHANCE FOR RELIEF.

CONSULT LOCAL LAWYER.

Sarvesh Kumar Sharma Advocate (Expert) 17 November 2013
File an application before mediation centre (DLSA) for your issue. Divorce is always last option

Dr J C Vashista (Expert) 17 November 2013
Approach her with a positive mind to reconcile your differences and settle in matrimonial life, you will really enjoy even better than before marriage.
It is not so easy to get a divorce or judicial separation,as you are feeling now.
Avoid putting law into motion. Engage a local lawyer.

malipeddi jaggarao (Expert) 17 November 2013
Fully agreed with expert Dr.Vasishta. It is not so easy and it is too early in your case. Yours is a love marriage. She is not totally unknown to you. Could you not guess her attitude during the dating period? What made you to change your opinion in a very short time? What are the factors that are contributed for her behaviour from your side? Divorce, Judicial Separation will take its own time. Even if you get divorce, to start a new life it will take some more time. If you could not save your love marriage, what is the guarantee that your new life be comfortable that too a stamp on your face that you are already married? Don't be hurry. Have a talk with her and find out the reasons.

V R SHROFF (Expert) 17 November 2013
""she is in relations with her sister in law""
how it affect u??

Rajendra K Goyal (Expert) 17 November 2013
Well advised by the expert, nothing more to add.

ABDUL RAZIQUE (Expert) 18 November 2013
Agree with malipeddi Jaggaroa Ji.

T. Kalaiselvan, Advocate (Expert) 19 November 2013
A few experts have given good piece of advice on the issue, especially Mr.Rao. Thus, as Mr. Rao asked you that what are you going to do after divorcing her, will you be looking for another young girl who will be more ignoring than the present one(suppose)? You say that it is very short period after marriage,i.e., I dont understand one thing namely, while loving each other for years together there was no problem of misunderstanding, harsh treatments, suspicions or any other thing because at that time the infatuation which prevailed did not allow room for such issues hence all the things were taken for granted then, but once that is over now, true colors are coming out making the facts very hard to be digested. However, even now no much damage has caused hence try to save the marriage and continue your married life as planned before itself.

Raj Kumar Makkad (Expert) 19 November 2013
I do endorse the wise advice of kalaselvan.

girish (Querist) 20 November 2013
thank u all lerned friends for your kind advice. but felt dissappointed with Mr.T.Kalaseivans opinion that i will dv. her and then find another young gal. common sir, i and she knew our age diff. right from beginning. in fact she only proposed me and was pressurising to marry her since last 4 yrs. and i never ever touched her forget about being physical with her during our affair. i still luv her and wud want her back again but she only started fighting with me and my family members without any specific reason or any fault of mine and my family members.also, i am not going to marry any gal once i divorce her if she wants to divorce me. me and her family met 2 times b4 and last week we came to know from our sorces that she is telling in public to all that i am elder then her and we are harrassing and torturing her which is totally reverse in my case. only we two stayed there. so who tortured her? my family never came to the house.? see, its crulety on me coz i have always been nice to her, never demanded anything from her.she is having an affair with her sisters husband which i came to know after my marriage.but i dont have evidence for that. now they want to meet us again and want me and her to take a final call without any fights i.e staying together or going for divorce? also they are recording all our talks we are having with them on fone. but we are not worried coz we are on the right way.my only concern is my family memebrs shud not be falsely involved by her? pls guide me ? can i take their anticipatory bail from court? and is a.b. too expensive?

malipeddi jaggarao (Expert) 22 November 2013
Why do you worry when there is no fault on you and your family? There is no point in doubting pre-marital relations. You should help to come out of such situations instead of poking into the history. First of all decide yourself either to save the marriage or to go for divorce. If you want to save the marriage, you should poking into past history and be positive. For sometime let your parents not interfere in your affairs. If you want divorce, MCD is the best option. You should to convince her to co-operate with you for filing MCD.

ajay sethi (Expert) 22 November 2013
your marriage is only six months old . try for reconciliation . suggest visiting a marriage counselor to resolve your differences .

no harm in vising your in laws place . if your wife does not want to stay with you go in for divorce by mutual consent

Dr J C Vashista (Expert) 24 November 2013
I agree and appreciate the advise of Sh. Ajay Sethi

girish (Querist) 26 November 2013
thank u all rao sir, ajay sir,and vashista sir for ur kind advice and support given to me, as per ur guidance me and my famlt memebsr met her and her family members few days back. but again she refused in front of all of us to stay with me jointly.so me and my family members assured her and her family members that if she does not want to stay jointly then i will rent a place and stay with her seperately. but still she refused to stay with me that too in front of my family as well as her family again and again.even her father and her brother
assured me that she will behave properly & started asking me when will i find a rental place to stay with her so that she can come and stay there with me? i said i will find rental residential place very soon and call her but before it i tld them that she has to tell in front of all ( mine as well as her family memebsrs present in the meeting) that she is ready to stay with me there. just wanted to assure myself one last time that if she says in front of all all things will be fine. but surprisingly she once again refused to stay with me in front of all our family members( mine and hers) hwich was very insulting and mental torture on me in public and started quarelling ith my sister and threatend me to lodge police complaint against me.and then i got a shock ing news late in the evening i was called to the police station as she had loged a police complaint against me and told there that she dont want to stay with me. i went to the police stn and they told me wot happenned and i tried to make them understand but they too told me that she dont want to stay with me anymore and wants her money she kept with me back.i felt so isa dtowards the cruelty meted out to me from her side in the police station also. i said ok and told them that i will return all her money on asap and told them to tell her to collect all her belongings also from our residence. the police officer sir told me that they will collect all their things and money she kept with me at the same time. sir, i still loved her after all these cruelty meted out to me by her.i still tried to be optimistic about things getting right.ut i felt shatterred when i started getting threating calls from her sides people to force me to give her divore. now tell me sir was it wrong to was it my fault to marry her?now i hate her. i just dont want her in my life sir. pls. give me permanent solution fro this?her relatives r forcing me to apply for divorce so that they can claim alimony from me though she is working and earn a good salary. pls advise me on asap as i have to return all her belongings and money by Saturday?pls. guide urgenlty sir?

V R SHROFF (Expert) 26 November 2013
"i have to return all her belongings and money by Saturday"

While returning, get a declaration it is willingly and voluntarily and no dowry demand or cruelty or violence.

but return it,, to save u from other criminal actions.

Divorce

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